The King of Oblivion

akingofoblivion @ 2007-12-29T01:10:00

2007-12-29T07:12:29Z

title: Haunting
characters: Sora/Roxas
rating: G to NC-17

a_good_other: There was a house on Sunset Boulevard that everyone avoided. At a glance, it was hard pressed to see why: it was a majestic manor that had a spectacular view of the sunrise as it crept over the distant mountains. The building was four stories high and spacious, and it came with a courtyard was filled with trees and green grass. It was very modern inside, with a fireplace, a jacuzzi, several bathrooms and master bedrooms, a beautiful kitchen, and a sunroom to lounge in. Yet, despite all the possibilities and amenities that it offered, it had been for sale for over a year before somebody finally decided to purchase it.

The family that moved in after the purchase of the home had no idea of the manor's secret. Everyne knew that the house on Sunset Boulevard was haunted. However, the who or what that went on in the home to cause it to be haunted was a big mystery. There were many theories, all involving murder and witchcraft and other such oddities, but there was't one defining explaination as to why.

It must have been very frustrating for the blonde headed kid that had recently moved into this home. The other kids his age tended to avoid him, or if they befriended him, it was only to find out juicy details about what it was like to live in that house. If the answer they received wasn't fantastic enough to fit their tastes, they scoffed at the new boy and left him alone. People were hungry for gossip, as was the norm in these suburban neighborhoods.

Perhaps, Roxas believed that the brown haired kid that shadowed his home was one of those gossip-mongers. There was a boy that often rode a green bike back and forth in front of the manor. He must have went to a different school because their paths never crossed, except when it came to meeting each other's eyes past the wrought iron gate of the manor. The boy always came around sunset, during afterschool hours. First he would ride down the block, and then eventually stop at the gate and look up at the bedroom window.

For an hour, he would stare up at the bedroom, and if he was caught, he would hop on his bike and ride away. This went on for several weeks, until one day, he squeezed a bento box through the main gate and left it there. Whoever picked it up would wonder who was Roxas's admirer, because the meats, rice and sushi had been arranged into the shape of a heart.

Once Roxas got wind of what was in the bento box, he probably formed a whole new opinion about the strange boy that keep staring into his bedroom window.

a_king_of_oblivion: He was quiet under the best of circumstances. This was the main reason why, in school, he made friends very slowly and why, when his parents told him they'd gotten new jobs, it had been so hard to leave. Roxas was truly an island, and the shyness that hindered him back home was a debilitating illness here, where he was new, where he was the requisite social outcast. Even the children who tried to ask about the house got very little information simply because Roxas didn’t know what to say – he didn’t know why they were asking or what they wanted to hear, and by the time he’d guessed as to what might satisfy them they’d long since stopped asking.

Subsequently, Roxas was a very unhappy, very lonely boy.

He found himself at home a lot, and he sequestered himself a lot in his room even though his mother tried to get him out to talk, but who wants to talk about school to their mom? Roxas told her nothing when she asked what had happened at school that day, and he took his snacks to his room and he sat on his computer and he stared out the window.

He noticed the boy after a few weeks of living in the house. For a while he thought the kid was lost, or maybe the paperboy, or maybe even one of his schoolmates who were coming to try and ‘figure out the creepy house’. At first the staring made him angry because it reminded him of all the reasons why he wasn’t a part of the world beyond the fence, why he was an oddity and an eccentricity just like this house. After a while, though, he began to realize the boy wasn’t just staring at the house, he was staring at Roxas’s room. HIS room. Sometimes, Roxas fancied he was even staring at him.

It should have made him upset but it didn’t. Roxas stared back and he wondered why the boy was staring and he made up reasons why he was staring, because he was curious or he was crazy or maybe because he was lonely too and he was wanting a friend too and he was just like Roxas. This last one was the best one, Roxas felt, because to him it seemed the most plausible. In spite of this, though, the barrier of the gate was never broken – they kept staring at each other and who really knew what was going on in the other boy’s head until the day the boy slipped the bento box through the gate.

Roxas came down when his mother called him and he told her he didn’t know who the bento was from and no, it couldn’t be from a friend because he didn’t have any friends and no, he hadn’t seen who left it even though he had, and the whole time he wondered what he was supposed to think, and if he was expected to eat it. In the end he put it in the back of the fridge wrapped tightly in its container and untouched. He went back up to his room.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-09-28T13:13:00

2007-09-28T18:15:16Z

Title: Ties that Bind
Characters: Sora/Roxas
Rating: G
Storyline: Soulmates

A Good Other: It was a week and a half later after that faithful day in the hotel room. Sora didn't mean to delay the trip so much, it was just that there was a lot of preparation to do - preparation that he wished he had done the first time he went chasing after shadows. There was food to be stocked, gummi ships to be tuned, maps to be downloaded and reviewed, strategies to be discussed, and phone calls to be made. King Mickey was nice enough to donate money to their cause, much as he did for Sora the first time he went wandering through the stars. (Which is why he had money to buy a hotel room in the first place.)

And so, one one cool, autumn day, they took off to the stars and never looked back. At first, thing were very easy. They talked about old adventures and consulted with each other about their plans. Easy things that could break the silence without much effort. However, as the days wore on, there were less things to say, and those silences were filled with uncertainties and memories that called up old longings. There were many times when Sora would catch himself slowing as he passed Roxas' bunker door, and in those moments the temptation was great to throw it open, throw himself upon the bed and confess as a sinner would to a priest of how much he loved and wanted and missed and longed for days long past.

That never happened though. Instead, he passed on by, his stomach and heart filled with ache. And the closer they got to that destination, the ache would grow worse and worse, and it was the ache of hope so bright that it hurt. Was it possible that something so good could happen from such a desolate place? Was he building himself up for another long, lonely fall?

dualxwielder: The pregnant pauses and significant glances were not lost upon Roxas. He'd be lying if he said there weren't a few times he deliberately looked away, or pretended he wasn't looking to begin with, when Sora passed. It wasn't because they were unwelcome, either, or because he was offended. Roxas had his own demons, and they were all of them telling him he was imagining things, that there wasn’t anything passing between them there, and that even if there was it was almost entirely one-sided and undeserved. Roxas didn’t have a lot of issues with self worth, but hurting Sora was one of the darkest memories in his past, and there were still a lot of skeletons he’d been unable to release.

As the planet, or world, or WHATEVER it was, neared them Roxas could feel the tension drawing to a tight string he could have plucked and received a tune from. He often caught himself watching Sora out of the corner of his eye without realizing it. In those moments he would right his eyes in front of him, drag his palms over his jeans, and take a deep breath.

A Good Other (1:04:07 AM): Surprisingly, their destination wasn't any planet or even a world at all. It was simply a door, an old, oaken door that would have been perfectly normal as part of a cabin instead of the endless colors of gummi space.

That is, if they could even consider themselves in gummi space anymore. There was no air, and yet they could breathe. There was no light, and yet they could see. They were able to park their gummi ship and step right out to the door, as if they were strolling through a lobby instead of the floorless expanse of space. Everything was, and it wasn't at the same time.

The oaken door opened with the power of the keyblade, and when they stepped through, they were met with the sight of trillions upon trillions of doors floating haphazardly against the backdrop of a spinning miasma of color. It was a sight that immediately struck one with the sheer hopelessness of ever finding Kingdom Hearts.

However, Sora had discovered the secret long ago. He placed a hand gently on Roxas' shoulder, assuring and affectionate, and he smiled warmly at the other boy.

"Run," he said in a sure voice. "And if your heart really wants it, it'll take you there." Sora then dropped his palm and gave Roxas a nod. Something about his demeanor, maybe the rigidity of his shoulders or the slight downturn of his lips, said that this was a run that Roxas may have to make alone. The pathways were long, difficult and treacherous. And there was no telling if the pathways their hearts took would lead to the same place, or even the same desire.

dualxwielder: Roxas stared at Sora for a long time. It was a look meant to assess, to peer through and behind those eyes that were so window like in their openness. Or at least, they used to be. Roxas looked, and for half a minute he expected the doors to be closed on him.

But they weren't.

He turned, and looked down the hall. The doors floated and not floated, each one on a different plane and yet he could walk up and touch any one of them. They would open if he touched them. He knew it. But he didn't touch, not a one.

The first mistake he made was walking. The steps that carried him into that place were slow, halting, and testing. The Thing lurking there sensed that. The Thing lurking there knew.

When the figure coalesced, it was black. The coat was familiar enough, one he would have expected, if he’d been expecting an attack. Roxas found, though, as he looked up into the darkness of the hood, that he dreaded to see the face hidden in the darkness. The conversation he had with it was not entirely in his own head and not entirely out of it – Where are you going? You don’t want to go that way. You know what you really want, admit it. Roxas struggled, and he argued, and he almost felt like he was arguing with himself. Don’t you remember? You choose me. It’s me…

The figure lunged, or maybe he’d already lunged – Roxas didn’t become aware he’d been fighting until one particularly heavy blow jarred him backward. The cowl was going to fall. It was going to fall and when it did, it would be the killing shot.

Roxas turned on his heel, and he ran.

A Good Other (1:27:40 AM): Sora was not privy to seeing what Roxas' struggles were. The minute that the other boy took a step closer to the doors, he'd simply vanished. This left Sora behind to contemplate the doors, and remember his first escapade to Kingdom Hearts.

The sight of so many doors had filled him with despair. He had come such a long way, a very, very long way in hopes of relieving the deep burden in his heart, and now the universe was laughing at him by presenting him with this impossible task.

He had run out of recklessness. Sora ran and went willynilly through any door he found, because going back was even more frightening. And behind every single door was the same scene over and over again: a barren wasteland, and a tombstone bearing his name. There were no tracks on the grave, no flowers to mark that visitors had come to mourn him. Sometimes the wasteland was surrounded by darkness, sometimes it was just at the edge of a pub where all of his old friends dined and went blissfully through life without a thought to the crumbling, dry stone that was left to rot, forgotten.

He couldn't say if he ran for days, minutes or years. All he knew was that he reached a point where he was on his knees and scratching at the dirt with his bare hands, determined to dig up whatever rotting skeleton was under there and throw it at the table where Riku, Roxas and Kairi ate and drank just to make them remember that yes, he once existed and deserved to be remembered -- and instead of a coffin, he'd found another door.

The other doors were all the same. They presented a scene that devastated him to see, and it wasn't until he'd made piece with it that he was allowed to go through. He saw Roxas happily married with children. He saw Riku with a new best friend. He saw Kairi growing up with another young boy. All of them showcasing the very many ways that he could be easily replaced or forgotten, just as he was so sure that Roxas had already moved on and forgotten about him by then.

It wasn't until he remembered the love in his own heart that he was finally allowed through the final door. Because.. even if they forget me, I'll always love them enough to remember, even if its just for me.

And those tender memories had formed a pearlescent chain, which became his final door. It happened then, as it did now. Unless Roxas, he didn't need to run again. He only remembered, and stepped through the door to where heart desired.

And that desire took him to an old, dusty place that was collapsed, ruined, and very deep underground.

dualxwielder: Roxas didn’t care for the doors to find anything – he was trying to run from something, and the doors were merely tools to get him there. Only whenever he ran, whatever door he touched or opened or barreled through, he merely came out into the same hall, face to face with the same figure, the same hood falling back.

At first, it was Riku. Then it was Axel. The fourth or fifth time it became Xemnas. Each time his heart skipped a beat, each time he felt a little piece of himself fall into the dread of his stomach. People he’d betrayed, or who spoke a testament to his betrayal, in one way or another. People who proved his worthlessness, But ultimately, the face he dreaded to see only came after he’d ran himself into stitches, when he was bent double and panting and his vision was blurred with tears he didn’t even feel.

Go ahead. Cry. It’s all you can do. It’s all you’re good for. Broken promises and regret. Roxas looked up, though he already knew he’d meet his own gaze, his own face rising from that coat. He knew he was supposed to feel chastised, but he was far too tired to feel anything at all.

“I’m worth more than that,” he said, though it was hard to get the words out through all his wheezing. His doppelganger-face laughed, and the sound was like anvils falling with the weight of their own mockery. The figure shimmered, and it was no longer his own face in the coat, but Sora’s.

Are you sure? All you do is live in other people’s shadows. Even now, your life is just a mockery of something real, something you do only for yourself. Roxas closed his eyes, but it didn’t matter. He could see Sora in his mind’s eye regardless. There were no more doors to hide behind.

Even I cut you out of my heart. I didn’t need you, or your lies, or your false apologies. False bravado and forced independence. You wear your scars like a badge, your guilt like a trophy that validates your existence, but what have you ever done to prove you’re really and truly thinking of anyone but yourself? He felt the hand slice into his chest, and rip away every wall he’d ever tried to build around himself. And just like that, he was falling back, and he knew it was over. Still, though, the question had been asked, and he wanted to answer it.

I’d go back, if it meant making you happy. I’d die for you.

I need you.

He was standing on something solid, no longer falling. The air around him was curiously silent. Almost peaceful. The air smelled dusty, and stale. Roxas took a deep breath and opened his eyes.

A Good Other (2:18:36 AM): There was nothing in the room but stone, dust and remnants of what must have been sophisticated machinery once upon a time. It was clear at a glance that something incredibly seismic and powerful must have happened to crack the marble in half and pulverize it in other places. The most telling feature, however, were the claw marks that gouged the floors and streaked across the walls towards some unknown destination above them. Even though these features may have been millennias old, Sora recognized the signs of stampeding heartless.

This was the place where it all began. This was the place where their stories unfolded and became part of the tapestry of history. Everything they were, and everything that they were all going to be began in this room.

But that was hero part of it anyway. Sora now knew in the deepest of his hearts that his journey with Roxas began the moment that his Other stepped from that ship, proud and beautiful. The moment he came into his world with all of that light and wonder, their destinies became intertwined. Roxas was the light's gift to him, a completion beyond what any other mortal would ever experience, as was his birthright.

But that was many lifetimes ago. Roxas was no longer his gift, nor could he even consider the other boy to be his anymore. The light gave, but their own darkness obscured its intention and purpose. Sora had forgotten how to protect and set free, and even now, even though he could remember how it had been, he couldn't think of how to make it be again.

Then again, maybe he had missed his chance in this lifetime anyway. If Roxas couldn't remember, then he would just have to accept this face. The years until his death were going to be cold and lonely, but knowing that they would meet again, that eventually they would have yet another chance to make it right again, gave him peace to weather those remaining years.

Sora sat on top of a demolished column with his eyes closed. He waited patiently, knowing that it may be forever until Roxas finally found his way through his demons. Still, he would be here, even if by the time Roxas was done he was nothing more than a skeleton.

When he felt light touch his eyelids, he opened them in surprise, and then blinked quickly to keep them from burning. It took several moments to resolve what he was looking at, but when he finally did, his mouth fell open and a sound of pure wonder fell from his lips.

"..It is here.." he said softly, and he could barely hold back his tears. "It wasn't empty after all. Kingdom Hearts.."

Was Roxas.

dualxwielder: At first, he didn’t see anything. The room was impossibly bright, the light emanating from something in the middle of the room. It moved and pulsed as though with a life of its own, and for a moment he had to look away from the brilliance to allow his eyes to adjust to the light.

As they did, he began to realize the rest of the room. It wasn’t old or dusty at all, but brilliant. Beautiful. The stone was highly polished and faceted, reflecting the light in a rainbow of color across embellishments of silver and gold. Faces of animals, of people, landscapes of forests and cities were all around him in relief, and he could feel them dancing off the walls, those colors, could feel them singing and speaking in a language he’d heard all his life. Only now, it was a language he could understand, instead of simply hearing. At last, he could realize what the light was saying.

The song broke his heart and scattered it at the same moment as it lifted it up and healed it. The words meant many many things, but the most important one was Look. The light sang to him, and it commanded him to Look.

He turned around. He barely noticed the rustle of soft silks around his ankles. His feet were bare and the floor was warm for being made of stone. He looked into the light that blinded, and he found it no longer blinded him at all. And just like that, there it was, the thing he’d been searching for all this time.

He took three steps, he closed the distance, he cupped that cheek in his hand and tilted that chin upward. He looked into those blue eyes so like his own and yet so different for all the color they shared. He closed his eyes and breathed in the scent he’d been dreaming about for years and years and centuries and millennia, bent down to kiss….

“Sora…”

Roxas opened his eyes. He was himself and the walls were no longer polished. A brief confusion overcame him, and then he was distracted – Sora was crying. He shifted that thumb against his cheek, and brushed the tracks of the tears away. He didn't seem to notice how close he still was.

A Good Other (1:25:21 AM): Sora appeared as if he were in a trance while Roxas ghosted towards him. All he could see, feel and hear was his Other and the Light that poured from him like a healing balm. His heart trembled and his knees would have surely buckled from weakness if he had been standing, because every part of him had suddenly turned to water. The ache of a year's separation was nothing compared to the abyss in his soul that came from being incomplete.

In this one moment, he relieved the arrival of his love and heart. Once again, the grand boat was there and he was dressed in his finest furs, and he stepped forwards with his heart in his throat to meet the one he had been waiting for forever. Even before he had seen Roxas' face, he felt the rightness; he felt the purity and deepness of their bond.

And now that he felt it again, he could no longer hold himself back. His hands lifted to numbly grasp some part of Roxas' clothing, and his eyes were full of tears and remorse as the damn broke and everything he wanted to say came pouring forth.

"I have taken you for granted," he said brokenly, "over and over again. Even when we first met, I didn't listen to my heart. And every time we've met after, I always turned away, until it was too late to realize what it is that I have.

"You are my one, Roxas. You are my light and my life, and I'd marry you a thousand times over and take you for my own in a thousand lifetimes in any way that I could. I turn away, I always turn away at first because I know I could lose myself in you and everything would change forever. With you I am different, and it scares me.

"So I take you for granted, and it hurts you and drives you away. And it hurts me, because I always forget that even though I'll change, I'll be someone better, because its you.

"I can't go back to the past. But someday, I promise you, there will be a lifetime where I never take you for granted again. I love you."

DualXWielder (1:42:26 AM): It was all so very very surreal. Everything here was as it really was and yet Roxas simultaneously saw it as something different. It was as though he was existing in two places at once, seeing two different things at one time, and to look back into the pages of his memory earned him revelation after revelation, so many it was almost overwhelming. He could barely reconcile who he was to what he saw in his past, in this place, but at the same time he knew that it was real, and Sora was real, and he was and always had been more important than anything.

"I've always been...proud." Even as he said it he knew it was true. Always, no matter what, he had that streak of pride in him that manifested itself in one way or another. Time could bleed some things out of you, but there would always be fundamentals you couldn't get rid of. Even after thousands of years the pride of that race he'd once belonged to was still strong.

"And it's...hard for me to accept, sometimes, that I need you as much as I do. I work so hard to build my own life and my own identity, and..." He shook his head, and pressed a hand to his temple. "This is really overwhelming, you know? Seriously, how did you deal with this?" He gave a self-concious little laugh and then reached down to take Sora's hand.

"I know we were stupid kids. And I don't really know what just happened here, or what it means. But I know that I am and I always have been half of something without you. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I couldn't be better. And one day, I promise you that there will be a time when I deserve you." He leaned forward, and closed his eyes, and pressed a warm kiss to Sora's forehead.

A Good Other (1:58:47 AM): He remembered. He remembered. Sora's eyes grew wide, and they were so blue and clear and filled with pure happiness. Roxas remembered, and the sharing of memories always meant the sharing of hearts.

Sora's chest felt warm, so warm that he was sure that his cheeks had flamed a dark color. He wouldn't have been surprised to find that they were floating out among the stars, because this moment was filled with a magic so deep that there were no books to record it or any words to describe it.

Kingdom Hearts was light. Pure light. And only now, Sora was beginning to understand where all of that light had gone.

"You're not so bad," he said in a soft, playful whisper. Then his arms wrapped around Roxas' middle and pulled him close for a strong, long hug. Sora buried his face into his Others abs, and smiled for what felt like the first time in centuries. And maybe it truely had been that long since he ever smiled like that.

They had plenty of time to process what had happened here on the way back home. Time to talk about who they were, who they are, and what they wanted to be. For now though, all Sora wanted to do was hang on and remember what it was like to walk hand in hand by an ocean so dark and deep that it reflected every last star with perfect clarity. He wanted to remember dancing and sharing families and secrets and hopes. He wanted to remember all those beautiful moments one last time, and hang on to them for just a little more.

DualXWielder (2:07:52 AM): Roxas was still a little confused. Was this only temporary? Was everything going to fade as soon as they left? From the way Sora was acting it seemed like it. Roxas tightened his arms around Sora and threaded his hand through the back of his hair. One cheek was lowered to rest atop his head, and it was almost like Roxas was trying to wrap him up in a cocoon where nothing could ever hurt him again. Even though he knew he couldn't do that.

"Yeah?" A smile pulled at the edges of his lips. "You're not so bad yourself, I guess."

Images were still flashing in front of his mind's eye, like he'd been hooked up to a direct download and he couldn't stop the stream. It was distracting to try and sift through, so at the moment he blocked it out. No matter what, Sora was still Sora and he was still Roxas. And right now that was all he wanted to focus on.

A Good Other (2:23:48 AM): For Sora, the memories didn't hold as strongly as they did while he was here in this place. They tended to fade at the edges a bit and lose some of their crispness, and every now and then he would get a flash that was as clear as a bell -- only for that to begin to fade as well. Roxas was right, it was an overwhelming thing to remember another lifetime. Perhaps their minds simply couldn't process all that was in their hearts.

Their old lives had ended in a tragic way that affected everything in the universe. Sora felt that he had failed everyone and everything by being unable to protect them from the calamity that had befallen them. After he'd gained the knowledge of his past, he often wondered if living life after life was a punishment or a blessing. Or maybe it was simply what they made of it.

They took all the time that they needed and wanted to see everything that they wanted to see. Sora had his fill first, and when he was done he tilted his head up to watch Roxas' face. If the other boy attempted to pull away, he would find that Sora was unwilling to let go.

DualXWielder (2:33:28 AM): Roxas didn't try to pull away. This was the first time in a year he'd really felt at peace. It was...wonderful. He almost thought he could stand here forever if it meant he never had to let this feeling go.

Sora was staring at him like that, though. He was feeling a strange flush rise to his cheeks. "Uhm." Roxas was really cute when he blushed. It happened so rarely. "Hi there."

A Good Other (2:37:14 AM): Sora smiled up at his Other, and then slowly, reluctantly let his hands fall. He stood up from the broken pieces of marble that he had been sitting on, dusted himself off, and then said conversationally, "Sorry. It's just nice remembering what it was like to have a husband."

He smiled cheekily at the other boy, and then offered his hand. If Roxas took it, then they would walk back to the gummi ship together, and go towards wherever it was that life led them next.

DualXWielder (2:40:49 AM): He felt as though he had the stupidest smile ever on his face. He just beamed at Sora for a long, silent minute, and his mind wandered over the many, many places that word took him~...

"...Yeah." The offered hand was taken. Roxas wasn't going to let it go any time soon.

A Good Other (2:41:53 AM): Neither was Sora.~

akingofoblivion @ 2007-09-24T02:38:00

2007-09-24T07:39:05Z

Title: Questions and Answers
Characters: Roxas and Sora
Rating: G
Storyline: Soulmates

[01:20] DualXWielder: It was a nice hotel, right next to the train station. Roxas had been in the lobby once or twice, out of curiosity and boredom. Once out of necessity. It was decorated to match the clock tower, filled with old finishes and baubles that reminded one vaguely of Art Nouveau. The concierge knew him, and Roxas waved to the man as he entered the elevator. Everyone knew him, here.

It was a far cry from how he'd lived on Destiny Islands, locked up in his room and afraid to meet people or make friends because of how they'd view him...no. Because of WHO they'd view him. Back then, Roxas had been obsessed with being his own person, and the thought of anyone comparing him to Sora had been unacceptable. Now, though...that didn't matter so much, anymore. It had helped, maybe, to get away to a new place, but some things you just outgrow. Parts of him were very much like Sora. Parts of him...well. They just weren't.

The carpet was plush and soft and muffled his footsteps to nonexistence as he walked down the hall to stop in front of the door that he knew was Sora's. He knocked quietly, wondering if his call was too impromptu. Maybe Sora'd been busy.

[01:30] A Good Other: Earlier during the day, Sora had been busy alright. Making intergalactic phone calls, touching base with old friends, job hunting, and... cutting his hair. After getting so many odd looks from the other people in Twilight Town, not to mention Roxas' small - and some not so small- hints, he'd decided to go to the cuttery and chop off most of the long spikes.

Now he was left with a fresh cut and a mostly normal look - for him anyway. He didn't know what they put into his hair to make his layers stay so flat, but he was trying his best to fix it by ruffling his hair back into its usual haphazard, but thankfully shorter mess.

The knock on the door distracted him from this. After peeling himself away from the mirror, he went to the front door, opened it, and found himself face to face with his other half. And still, no matter how many times he found himself facing his Other nowdays, the sight still filled him with such happiness, longing and relief. There were times when he had to restrain himself from throwing his arms around him with the joy of being together once more.

However, he didn't want to make Roxas uncomfortable or to complicate the nice life he built for himself in Twilight Town. So Sora smiled, gave Roxas a friendly "hey," and touched the other boy's elbow after ushering him inside. Completely friendly, despite the way that his eyes were glittering.

"I thought you had classes again today," Sora said once Roxas was situated. He had trouble following the mountain of classwork that Roxas had at the university, and often forgot when it was that his Other was leaving the library or the classrooms.

[01:44] DualXWielder: Roxas entered and for a moment he seemed distracted. He smiled faintly at Sora, but his eyes were very far away and dim with something that could have been a fleeting flash of memory. Or maybe it was just the touch on his arm. Whatever it was, it flickered away as quickly as it came, and Roxas smile became more genuine and real as he entered further into the room.

"Hey." It was a nice room. Single bed, fridge, television, all tastefully decorated. Roxas stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jacket as he looked around. It was a letter jacket, the same color red as the university's colors. Roxas ran track there. A compromise, from turning down the football. "Your hair looks nice."

Obligatory compliment? Maybe. Contrary to what Sora might think, Roxas hadn't wanted him to get his hair cut. He looked just fine either way. But it was hard not to beam at that little bit of old familiarity the shorter hairstyle brought back.

"Yeah. I had them earlier this morning." Roxas wondered if they'd ever be able to get past this seemingly insurmountable barrier of small talk. It seemed to be a living thing, situating itself inside the room like some sort of watchful dragon they had to pay homage to. "So I have the rest of the day off."

[01:52] A Good Other: "Oh," Sora articulated dumbly. It sounded like such an insignificant, one-syllable word, but it carried so much behind it. Oh, class is over. Oh, you have the rest of the day off. Oh, you're here and I'm here and now I have you for the rest of the night if I want to but I don't know how to get past the awkwardness.

It was hard to pick up on their old vibe, because they had been lovers before. Sora was finding that it was very hard to settle back into a friendship after that history, especially one as sordid and long as theirs were. Still, it was a worthy struggle, because it brought Roxas to his door and into his room and made his day a little brighter.

Sora self-consciously ran his hand through his hair and grinned. "I got tired of the kids calling me tofu head. Look!" He ducked into the bathroom momentarily, and returned with the long braid of hair that had been trailing over his shoulder. "They let me keep it. I've never had my hair this long before."

And hopefully he never would again, considering that it had only grown that long because he had been away for so long. "Do you want some hot chocolate? I have a ton of it in the refrigerator." Sora had been drinking it by the gallons since he came to Twilight Town. It was the only way he would take his milk nowadays.

[01:59] DualXWielder: "Oh. Uhm. Sure." It seemed they were both masters of spoken language today. Roxas glanced around for a place to sit, and ended up moving toward the little table situated off to one side of the dresser. It had a lamp and two chairs next to it. Seemed like the logical place. The braid made him chuckle; it looked like some sort of strange tail. "What are you gonna do with it? Make a brooch?"

Roxas hadn't expected everything to be hunky-dory right away. To be honest, he was just happy Sora was here, was talking to him. It was a far cry from how it had been for the past year, and he'd never expected this to happen, not like it had. So really, any conversation was fine enough conversation, it was just hard to balance where they were with where his heart was telling him they should be. He knew the rules dictated from past experience and choices and time and distance, but that didn't stop his heart from jabbering at him that this was Sora, you should be closer...

Pulling his hands out of his pockets, he moved the chair back and sat. He then commenced rubbing his palms over the tops of his jeans in a faintly self-conscious motion.

"Actually...I came to ask you a favor." And from the solemn way he was watching Sora, it was obviously a big one.

[02:06] A Good Other: "I don't know. I just think it makes a good souvenir," Sora answered in regards to the tail of hair. That piece of hair was his testament to all the time he spent searching and searching, and then coming to an answer that had been in his heart all along.

While Roxas sat down, Sora placed the braided section of hair on the glass surface of the table and seemed to lose himself for a few moments in his own memories. For a few moments, the table became shaped like an oversized lilly wrought out of the finest gold-flecked marble, and a beautifully robed Roxas sat next to it on a chair crafted in the shape of a leaf. Roxas was tittering over the milk in his tea that day, he was fairly certain that the milk was sour and since Sora was just standing around he could go into the kitchens and fetch him something better --

[02:07] A Good Other: He blinked when Roxas began to speak again, and once more he was in his hotel room. The somberness of his Other's tone did not escape him, so when he lowered himself into the opposite chair it was slow and deliberate; his movements reflecting the gravity of his understanding.

"Name it," he said evenly.

[02:12] DualXWielder: Sora's mental absence had not gone unnoticed, and Roxas sat there with an odd but curious tilt to his head, watching the way in which the other boy's back bent. Roxas had resolved to ask him about it, and then Sora spoke and the moment was over and the thought flew from his head. Maybe he'd ask about it later...but then, it would be too late...

"I..." It was somewhat unlike him to be unsure of his words, but Sora had the effect of making him unsure in a lot of ways. Or maybe he was just unsure of where they stood, the both of them. Whatever it was, it caused his hand to gloss across the table and fiddle with the lamp cord.

"I wanted to ask you. If you would take me to Kingdom Hearts."

[02:19] A Good Other: The reaction was immediate. Sora's back stiffened, and his face phased through several emotions. Surprise, guardedness, then hope. He didn't know why Roxas was drawn there, but there had always been a secret hope that he would seek it out and peel away its secrets in the same way that Sora had. However, it was long, hard journey, and there were many heartless and personages that they would have to defeat before passing completely through.

Sora never did like to see Roxas in danger. The wish for his Other to always be safe and happy had never changed. However, he was willing to accept this mission because it was as much Roxas' right to at least see the place where it all began as much as it was Sora's.

"I will," Sora answered quietly. Then he added tentatively, because the bright hope in his heart refused to die, "Can I ask why?"

[02:23] DualXWielder: "I...I really don't know." Roxas felt frustrated that he had to give such a lame answer to such an important question. He knew the trip would be a long one, and he guessed it likely wouldn't consist of sitting in a gummi ship for a week. But it was something he wanted to do...no, it was something that he needed to do.

"I just...feel like I should." This answer was even more inadequate, and he felt silly somehow, even though he knew Sora wouldn't think he was. No, it was because he couldn't understand it for himself that he felt so off-balance -- something that seemed so important should have a reason for feeling that way, shouldn't it?

"I've been having these weird dreams...they.." He sighed, and rubbed the back of his neck. "I really don't know why, honestly. I just feel like it's important."

[02:30] A Good Other: Sora closed his eyes. He was trying not to let the trembling feeling in his heart move him into doing or saying anything rash. If Roxas was meant to remember, then he would. If not, then it just wasn't time yet.

Hundreds of lifetimes had gone past. He could barely remember any of them, but every now and than a flash of color or a spoken word would bring him to a place that he had never seen or heard before, but felt familiar all the same. Then the images would slip away, and he would only remember vague smells, tastes and touches that were forgotten with time.

"Well.." Sora murmured, and then he opened his eyes. The edges were wrinkled with smile lines. "It's not the first time you've had funny dreams right? They're never led us wrong before. We'll do it." He leaned away from the table, straight and ready for action. "We'll go together."

Just saying those last three words sent a thrill of excitement through him. They would go together, back to the old forgotten home they once shared. And maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be empty this time.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-09-20T03:48:00

2007-09-20T08:49:21Z

Title: The Light That Fades
Characters: Sora and Roxas
Rating: G
Storyline: Soulmates

A Good Other: Twilight Town looked even more golden in October. As always, the eternal sunset kept the sleepy town wrapped in purples, reds and deep yellows, however in October, they were augmented by the golds, browns and oranges of dying leaves.

The temperature drop always prompted the citizens to give up their tank tops and skirts for wooly sweaters, knitted gloves and jackets that still retained that year-long closet smell - until they were washed anyway. Many images were associated with October, including backpacks, trolleys flooded with school kids, and of course, the coffee shops. Naturally, coffee became something of a commodity when the air turned a little chilly. Shop owners made sure that their neon signs were bright and the tables were well polished and welcoming for the crowd that typically came by. The scent of cappuccino, chocolate and almond permeated the air, so sweet and spicy that one couldn't help but flare their nostrils to take it all in once they arrived.

Sora touched his nose after taking in a deep breathe and found that his hands came away wet. He almost always caught a cold every time he encountered weather that was cooler then the balmy Destiny Islands, but by now he was used to it. The boy scrubbed himself with the back of his hand and then wrapped his palms around the steaming cup of cappuccino that was on the round table before him.

Would he even come?

A lot could change in the year. Sora had changed. His eyes reflected something a little deeper, and his hands looked more worn and calloused as if he had spent a lifetime doing menial labor. The leather of the jacket that he wore was well worn and broken in from his travels, and the tattered jeans he wore could have seen better days.

Still, when he felt someone bump his arm on the way to the counter, he smiled in acceptance of the person's apology, and that smile still held a reminiscent twinge of better days spent in the heyday of innocence.

DualXWielder: It was funny, the things that influenced you. One would think if you came from the same heart as another being, you'd like the same things they liked. And that was true, to an extent. Some things were the same. Some things, though, in the push and pull and tear of separate lives, ended up being very very different.

Roxas liked the cool weather. He liked the colors the leaves changed as the season turned cooler; he liked the smell of fires burning in fireplaces from chimneys along the street. He liked the way his nose got just a little too cold and how soft and warm a really good sweater felt. All in all, he enjoyed autumn, and found it his most favorite season out of the whole year. Summer was nice, and he enjoyed the ocean and the beach. But fall...there was really just no season so nice, he felt.

The coffee shop was small, a locally owned place, complete with a bell above the door that jingled when you stepped inside. Roxas hovered on the edge of the entrance for several long minutes, and he knew it was because he was a little nervous. It'd been a long time. He wondered what had changed, how Sora had changed, what had made him want to 'talk.' It was something he'd thought about many times, of course, but...

He himself had gotten taller. His shoulders were more broad; not the same scrawniness that he'd once been, but not a football linebacker. Though the local university had wanted him to run Quarterback for a while. He'd told them no.

The bell jingled merrily when he walked in. Roxas took a breath, and rubbed his thumbs over his fingertips where they rested inside the pockets of the thick blue fleece hoodie. The shop was full, but not bustlingly so. Roxas scanned the interior, looking for a face he knew he'd find familiar, no matter what the framing.

It was still a little like looking in the mirror.

A Good Other: A little like watching a mirror, but the differences that were there were notable. Sora's hair was highlighted with more honey brown, as if he had spent many months beneath a scorching sun, and it was more haphazard than ever. One of his spikes had grown so long that it went past his shoulder, and that particular strand had been braided and cinched with a black rubber band. It was clear just by being in Roxas' vicinity that they had come to live two very different lives. Roxas' clothes were more neatly pressed and cared for, for one thing, and he carried an air of knowledge that was not there before.

The moment that Roxas entered, it was as if a beacon had gone off in Sora's chest. Before the door to the coffee shop had even closed, he had turned around and set his eyes on the person that he had been waiting for. His mouth dropped open a bit, and then he stood up from the stool that he had been sitting on to greet his Other. That dumbfounded look remained on his face until Roxas had made it all the way to his table, and the first thing he had to say was..

"You're taller than me."

By an inch. Sora's eyes kept bobbing up and down, taking all of Roxas in and realizing once more how very long a year could be. Then the awkwardness of their current reality set in, and he buried one of his hands through his messy hair in a familiar, self-conscious gesture.

"I should have drank more milk," he added in a quieter murmur. His feet wouldn't stop fidgeting.

DualXWielder: Roxas was struck by how much older Sora seemed. And it wasn't the fact that he physically looked older, or that he'd grown or filled out or whatever you want to call it. No, it had more to do with that look in his eyes, the one that spoke to having seen things, and done things, experiences that he'd gained and in the process innocence that had been lost. Maybe, in the end, it was just a maturity that he sensed, one that the Sora of his memory had lacked in what seemed like ages ago.

"Am I?" Roxas raised an eyebrow and couldn't stop his eyes from looking up as though he could see the top of his head if he tried. Heh. He looked back down and rubbed the back of his neck with a faint blush. "Hadn't noticed." Inside his other pocket, his fingers were still running over each other. It helped, to distract him from how fast his heart had started beating when Sora had met his eyes.

You forgot the little pits and hollows in your soul when you were forced to live with them every day. You forgot what they felt like as they dulled with time. Right now, Roxas was being reminded.

"Your hair is longer." Wow. This conversation was riveting.

A Good Other: Sora's eyes squinted slightly, as if he could read beyond Roxas' nervous gestures and fidgeting. It was clear to see that he was suddenly reminded of his purpose here, because within moments, he stopped rubbing the back of his head and his legs went still. Just like that, he was calm and controlled, which was a contrast to the circumstances in which they had parted ways.

Wordlessly, Sora grabbed the spare stool that was at his table and pulled it out for Roxas to sit in what was quite a gentleman's gesture. If Roxas sat down, then he would take his place across from him at the round table, otherwise he would just stand behind the chair, lips thinned by how hard they were being pressed.

"I'm really glad you came," he pressed despite the heaviness between them. "I thought about waiting a little longer, but I wanted to see you now." His words revealed that this meeting was something that he had been thinking about for quite some time. Before he could say more, however, a waiter came by and began giving Roxas his spiel on the specials of the day and his recommendations. Sora waited until the waiter was done, his eyes boring into Roxas' the entire time.

DualXWielder: The statement had quite the effect on Roxas, which was to say it distracted him enough to make him forget his fidgeting. When Sora offered him the stool he gave a quiet but polite "Thank you." and placed his hand on the back in order to sit. He didn't mind the gesture. Once upon a time, he might have seen it as a challenge to his 'authority,' but Roxas had lost a lot of his reckless anger over the past year. It was no longer a matter of 'proving himself' to the world. Time and experience did that to you, too.

"I'm glad you called." The statement was even and easy, said after Roxas had waved off most of the waiter's prattling and ordered a hot tea with a nod and a smile. He wasn't all that hungry, really, and didn't want to have to mess with the waiter coming back every five seconds to check on the table, or how the food was. "Though...I was surprised."

Roxas didn't have issues meeting Sora's gaze. His own was curious, and held a little bit of confusion, but Roxas wasn't going to sit there and try to pretend he hadn't thought about it, or wondered, or wished sometimes in his resigned acceptance. What good would that do? He wouldn't fool anyone, and this was supposed to be a good sort of meeting. He hoped.

"How have you...been?"

A Good Other: Sora looked surprised at the question. How had he been? How had he been. Mentally, he flashed through what the past year had been like. Leaving the island with Riaru to live in Agrabah for two months, before finding out that he had been completely brainwashed by the lamp all along. There had been no Arabian lord pulling the strings with the help of the evil genie, it had been Riaru all along, wishing for the one person that had ever showed him an inch of compassion. If it weren't for King Mickey's interference, he would probably still be living that lie.

But that adventure had led to many more. Worlds upon worlds, billions of miles away, fighting the darkness, searching for the answer to his most burning questions. Why are hearts incomplete, where do fake hearts go, why would his own heart betray, why are people born with such darkness?

His quest was both a searching and an escape from his own pain. There were days when the pain had been so awful that he shuddered to remember what it had been like. But with time, everything had dulled until it became one of those old scars that always brought distant memory whenever seen, touched or remembered. A scar that always came with a story, whenever anyone asked.

"I've... I've kept busy," he answered as honestly as he could. And then he found that he could no longer hold back.

"I've been to Kingdom Hearts."

DualXWielder: "Oh."

Roxas' surprise was evident. For a moment he could do nothing but blink owlishly at Sora; his mind had gone utterly blank with that confession. For one, he didn't understand it, and for another, he didn't understand how that had prompted Sora to call him now.

"What happened?" Obviously a lot, but there were too many questions and Roxas didn't know how to ask most of them.

A Good Other: "Nothing," Sora said in a hushed whisper. "There was nothing there."

Kingdom Hearts had been nothing more than a pile of rubble. Despite all of his searching, all he could presume was that this place had once been very technologically advanced, and there had been something important in that enormous room that he had found himself in - but otherwise, the place was barren. The fabled Kingdom Hearts was nothing more than a broken dream.

"Its so empty," he continued in the same quiet tone. "Not even the heartless bother to go there. People think that there is power there, but it hasn't been there for a long time."

Sora reached into his pocket and produced what appeared to be the broken, metallic shards of something that had once been silver and gold. A Good Other: Their surfaces had become tarnished with time, although their shaping hinted at something that had once been strong beautiful.

"That's when I realized that I've been empty too." Sora drew away his palm, and watched Roxas with a hooded look.

DualXWielder: Roxas had reached out unconsciously to touch at the thing Sora showed him, and only became aware that his hand was moving when the palm was pulled away. He paused, and felt his eyes draw closed and open again, as though a part of him had been a million miles away.

Honestly, he...he didn't know what that meant. Long ago in what seemed like another lifetime, Kingdom Hearts had been something he and everyone he knew had followed after like broken puppies. It was strange to think of it empty and barren, a monument to nothing.

What did that mean? He wanted to ask, but something told him even Sora didn't know.

The hand that had reached forward dropped down to rest atop the table. "Did you find out what had happened there?" Roxas knew Sora was staring at him: he'd seen it, and dropped his eyes down to rest on his hand for a moment. A faintly bittersweet smile came to his face as he sat there, ruminating over the flashes of memory that came across his mind's eye.

"Yeah," he said, finally looking back up. In spite of all the changes, some things stayed the same. Sora still had trouble saying what was really on his mind, sometimes. "I missed you."

A Good Other: When Roxas asked if Sora had discovered what had mysteriously happened to Kingdom Hearts, the boy pursed his lips, and then gave a small, resigned nod. "You don't remember," he murmured, and for a moment it looked as if he might begin to cry, but the tears never came.

Instead, he became earnest and moved as if to reach Roxas, but his hands never quite came across the table. His fingers curled into fists by the shards of metal, because there was still a year of time and people and life between them.

"I don't care about what happened anymore. We were stupid kids, and we're probably still a long way from being smart. Maybe doing dumb things is the only way we learn to be better. Other people might grow apart and go on, but we never will Roxas. We can't, you're you and I'm me and the me without you is so empty. It doesn't matter even how different you are now. It doesn't matter if you've forgotten all about me or don't even like me anymore. All I wanted - if, to ask, I --"

Sora seemed to be having trouble saying the words that he wanted to say.

"Some part. I want to be some part.. "

Sora became frustrated with himself in finding the words for what he wanted to say.

DualXWielder: "I don't..." The question was on the tip of his tongue but for a split second he couldn't ask it. I don't remember what? Something inside of him said it was the wrong question, he was looking in the wrong place. And then he too became frustrated, because he didn't know what he was looking for, or where he should begin to look. Distant and far away, a voice was crying out desperately, and it sounded very much like a voice that was his own.

I want to remember! Please, help me remember...

Sora's distress acted like a focused echo directly on his person; it disturbed him to the point of instant movement. He knew he was lost somehow, knew he wasn't understanding something he really should, but all he could hope was that it would somehow work itself out. Because right now all he knew was that face Sora was making was a face he'd never liked to see.

Not in a million years.

The hand on the table moved without a thought to the consequences, to rest directly atop Sora's. "I don't....I never wanted..." He took a deep breath, and tried to gather his thoughts. The skin under his palm was very warm. He didn't know what to say, or how to make it eloquent, so he simply blurted out the words that were weighing on his heart.

"I'm here."

A Good Other: With those two simple words, it was as if a weight had been lifted from Sora's shoulders. It instantly showed on his face, vanquishing all the worry lines and wrinkles that had come with his desperate frown.

Roxas may never know the truth of how long Sora had been searching. A thousand millennia and countless lives, always birthed separate but always of one heart. However, it was only in this one lifetime where they shared the same body, and that awakened memories within Sora that had been dormant since the world was a panacea of light.

It probably wasn't time for Roxas yet, but that was all right. If Sora could only be one small part of his life, then he was richer than any king in all the worlds that ever was.

Once touched, he didn't hesitate in returning the grasp with a tight one of his own. Then he broke into a warm, grateful smile, and then a tear did slip past his lashes and paint its way down his cheek. He'd always been the crier out of the both of them.

There was no power in Kingdom Hearts. However, in the kingdom that existed in everyone's heart, there was a warm, forgiving light that was strong enough to vanquish darkness, but also weak enough to be overcome by it.

But long ago, he had made a silent promise that he would be strong when his Other needed him to be, and bow when it was his time to be weak. So he bowed deep, and waited for his Other to take him.

DualXWielder: Roxas was shaking. He hadn’t realized he was until Sora squeezed his hand, and he became aware of just how unsteady his body felt. He was shaking and it was as if something inside of him was vibrating apart with an almost agonizing relief. The pain that he’d grown accustomed to, the aching, the hollow – now, at last, it was starting to heal itself. And Roxas couldn’t stop himself from breaking with that release.

He didn’t let go of Sora’s hand. Instead, he stood and pulled the other boy up too, pulled him up and forward into a hug where he held tight. An inch was an inch, and it didn’t matter much. He’d been a lot taller, once.

….the strange thought slipped away almost as fast as it came. Roxas let it go, because right then he was holding something precious and nothing else really mattered. Sora wasn’t the only one capable of tears, and Roxas’ were curling down the sides of his face to land, warm and dripping, in the hollows of his Other’s neck.

There were so many things he wanted to say. So many sorries that he’d repeated over and over, so many thoughts and regrets and dreams he’d felt and had, late at night. In the end, though, he couldn’t say any of them. He could only stand there and press his cheek into Sora’s temple and silently cry.

His heart gave one encompassing ache of deliverance, and was still. “I love you,” Roxas whispered. I’m home.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-09-18T11:56:00

2007-09-18T16:56:35Z

[01:10] Zarathustra wove: Axel picked up the camera from his lap and aimed it out the driver-side window, which had been rolled down. It was dark outside, but the flashes were barely noticeable from this far across the street. In the center of his lens, drifting in and out of focus between perfect shots, was his high-profile prey. Each shot was worth hundreds, but the really good ones (read: the revealing ones) were worth thousands and more. He had gotten a hot tip that this mark would be in town here and now, and it had been right. It was lucky for his pocketbook, that was for sure.

It looked like to him that he was the only photographer out here, but it was hard to tell with all of the dark cars lining the street of the neighborhood. His mark wasn't going to a party or anything, because he wasn't surrounded by bodyguards and aspiring dates. Axel put the camera down and thought that maybe there was a fifteenth home nearby, of course listed under a different alias. It didn't matter, since he was going to follow his mark regardless.
[01:21] DualXWielder: The street was silent. He didn't really like silence. It was pretty oppressive, most of the time. Especially if you were used to people all around you all the time, yelling and grabbing at your attention. It wasn't that he liked the craziness, really, he'd just always had issues with being alone. Strange sounds, and all that crap. Ever since he was a kid, and his parents were always gone.

He shoved his hands in his pockets deeper and dug into the sidewalk with his heels. It was cold, and he should be thankful for the break from the screams and the flashes of pictures. He should relax.

Reflexively, he pulled out his phone, a slim little slice of technology that fit right in his palm, and dialed the number of the first girl who came up. There were a lot of them.
[01:28] Zarathustra wove: Axel watched the cell phone come out with piqued interest. Was this some sort of midnight rendezvous with a new earnest love? He probably would have traded one of his lungs to get a look at the guy's little black book, since the information there would be worth millions if handled by capable hands. The glow illuminated the side of Roxas' face and Axel's eyes drifted over the hazy profile. For a second there, he wasn't thinking right.

Silently, he got out of his car and looped the camera strap around his neck. There were a few more tools he grabbed too, like a notepad and his parka, which he slung on to make himself look more like a nighttime speed-walker. He followed Roxas, staying on the other side of the street, with his fingers curled around the camera beneath his parka.

Axel was the kind of photographer that lacked scruples when it came to snapping shots. He didn't respect the wishes of celebs and other high-profile slabs of meat, like trial lawyers, murder suspects, and all the rest. A few times he had even gotten fined and arrested for digging in trash, climbing fences; he had gotten roughed up by bodyguards for harrassing their clients; once, he had almost gotten killed on the premises of a trigger-happy ex-cop in the middle of a mafia-related drug bust. It was the closest he ever got to dying, but his bank certainly didn't suffer.
[01:37] DualXWielder: The phone rang and rang and Roxas rubbed his fingers together absentmindedly as he listened to the tone. She wasn't gonna answer. He knew that already, but he kept on because the ring of the phone was mildly comforting. Not really, but he told himself that.

That was pretty irritating. Most people picked up immediately when he called, not because they were all that interested in what he had to say, but because this city was all about who you rubbed elbows with. He knew most of his friends were only fakes, a pathetic version of the real thing that only associated with him for what he could do for them, but he told himself that somewhere deep inside they really cared. It was why he kept calling, and kept feeling empty every time he hung up.

He hung up and kept walking. This was one of the nicest neighborhoods in the city, but you could still hear feet echoing on pavement if you listened. Roxas listened, because he didn't have anything better to do. He then stopped, and looked behind.

What?
[01:43] Zarathustra wove: There was nothing behind him except the lonely stretch of sidewalk that was punctuated by solid iron street lamps. The sound he was searching for was coming to the right, across the street, on the sidewalk over there. Someone was out there. They were coming out from behind a parked car, parka and darkness consuming most of them, but they stepped beneath another street light to reveal some tall redhead--it was easy to see how his fiery hair lined the insides of his hood like fox fur--out for a very late walk. Axel was looking at Roxas, but his eyes weren't quite as distinguishable as his hair.

Being noticed was never a good thing, but he knew that if he stopped walking, he'd look even more suspicious. At worst he was going to have to walk past Roxas and then double back. Hopefully he wouldn't miss where Roxas had gone, if there was even a place for him to stay around here. Maybe he had run away from something and turned degenerate; that happened sometimes.
[01:47] DualXWielder: He lived around here, or at least there was a house that belonged to his family around here. He hadn't turned degenerate yet, though he had run away from something he was supposed to be at. He didn't care; if they got offended, so what? It wasn't like they wouldn't forgive him when his next album came out and he made hundreds of millions of dollars. Money forgave anything.

Except stalking. Which was the first thing that came to his mind when he saw the guy across the street. He didn't look familiar, and no one who lived in this area could fall into that category. Every face in this place had a name to go with it, and Axel had neither.

Roxas thumbed his phone. He wanted to shout at the guy but he knew that might not be a good idea. Stalkers got violent sometimes. Instead he turned on his heel and walked faster.
[01:50] Zarathustra wove: Having the police called on him wouldn't be the first time either. The great thing about the police was the same maxim that Roxas was familiar with: money forgave anything. So long as Axel was packing his pockets with green, then he could keep the cops from locking him up and throwing away the key for at least one more day. But getting arrested was still a lot of paperwork to sift through, so he held his breath when he saw Roxas eyeing him and carressing his phone like he was going to dial 911 faster than you could say "cheese!"

The moment passed. Good. Axel kept his head forward and eyes to the side and kept walking, never changing his pace at all; if Roxas got ahead, that was okay, because he'd see that golden halo of hair beneath every street lamp from here to the bend in the road. When Roxas got where he was going, Axel was going to try to figure out a way to get even closer.
[02:04] DualXWielder: House wasn't that far and down a gated lane with security. Dude would have a hard time getting in, so Roxas felt safe when he finally entered his house, regardless of whether or not he actually was. Everyone feels safe in their own homes.

Course, this one was huge and empty at the moment, so that didn't exactly HELP him. He continued to palm the phone back and forth in his hand as he climbed the stairs and made his way to the wing of the house typically reserved for him. There he changed and moved back toward the patio. There were two pools. He choose the one outside, because the sky was clear. For once.
[02:08] Zarathustra wove: The house would have been intimidating to someone who had never been in and around mansions like this. Axel crossed the street and walked past the gate, keeping a sharp eye out for the surveillence system. Every system had its blind spot, so it was a matter of scouting the perimeter and formulating a game plan. While he was lurking behind a tree on the opposite side of the place, wondering if there were anyone else home and what sort of vicious dogs or security personnel might confront him, he heard splashing. His ears perked. A pool. An outdoor pool, which struck him as funny, since that meant the right angle meant some real nice shots. What if Roxas swam nude?

Dollar signs, and...

He moved closer to the sound, making sure to never touch the fence or stray too far from the deepest shadows. When he reached the next tall oak tree, he studied the trunk and branches, and decided to see if he could see anything from up here. Thinking of the compact pair of binoculars in his back pocket, he hoisted himself up into the tree proper. When he got high enough, he chose a particularly thick branch to start scooting out onto to see if it overlooked the pool or something eles. The branches creaked dryly...
[02:13] DualXWielder: The house was empty, but it wasn't his, and though he knew no one would be home until late or possibly even tomorrow, he still walked through it in a bathing suit. Granted, it was far less than trunks and looked like something a professional swimmer would wear with its streamlined tinyness, at least he was covered in case the help came wandering around.

The creaking of the tree was lost amid the soft fall of water into a pool. Roxas stretched and took a deep breath. It was too quiet here. He didn't like it. But he'd left the keys to the stereo system inside. Maybe submerging himself in water would help block out the silence.

Only the trees with eyes would see him dive in.
[02:24] Zarathustra wove: Perfect. Axel felt his mouth water as he pulled the camera out from beneath the parka with one hand. The hot tip had indicated that Roxas wasn't supposed to be in this part of town right now--some boring and all-too-predictable party that his colleagues were probably smothering--so this midnight swim was all the more interesting. Perched on the branch, one hand on the camera and the other keeping his balance, he struggled to get a focused shot on the swimmer.

"Shit," he muttered when he was having trouble manipulating the expensive camera with only one hand. There were a bunch of dials and lenses, and buttons to press, and his fingers were long but not long enough.

It should have been against his better judgement, but he let go of the branch and reached up to handle the camera better. Nothing amazing happened; he didn't lose his balance. Unfortunately, it turned out the shot from here was pretty shitty even with it focused. He scooted forward on the branch and it dripped toward the fence, but he was looking through the viewfinder and not noticing.

Well, he did notice when the old, dry branch snapped on this weaker portion o it and sent him tumbling forward. The split-second reaction to jump off of the dipping limb was the only reason he didn't end up not clearing the fence and getting impaled on it.
[01:30] DualXWielder: Luckily for Axel, there was a nice hedge seperating the fence from the pool proper. Undoubtedly Roxas would have heard him regardless, had his head not been under water right at that moment. As it was, he surfaced immediately after the incident occurred, and spent several seconds breathing heavy and shaking the water from his hair and face. So long as Axel didn't make too much noise, he'd likely be safe.

Likely.

Roxas swam on his back for a few laps, and the heavy sigh was louder than even he expected. He didn't understand why he felt so heavy. Everything about him felt heavy, even his body. But mostly, it was a subconcious feeling going on beneath his skin he just couldn't shake.

After a few more meaningless laps, he got out of the pool and moved to grab a towel from the stand. They had outdoor showers here, complete with teak slatted windows for guests to adjust. At the moment, they were open. He didn't bother to close them.
[01:38] Zarathustra wove: Oh thank god.

Axel held his breath. When Roxas emerged, Axel kept his eyes forward and peered through the bushes. Unelss Roxas was taking his time in calling the police, then he hadn't been seen or heard when falling out of the tree. His heart was beating really, really hard; the adrenaline bothered him, since he tended to be calm.

The camera. He sat up and checked the camera, and miraculously it hadn't been damaged or destroyed. It was a good thing that Roxas was getting out of the water, too, because Roxas had a pretty good shot through these bushes. He pushed some twigs aside and peered at Roxas through the viewfinder.

His eyes sort of wandered, and between the illicit view, the adrenaline in his bloodstream, and the possibility of being discovered at any second, his mind was drifting.
[01:44] DualXWielder: Lucky camera.

It took little to no effort to get undressed and Roxas went about it mechanically. His mind was a thousand miles away and it showed in the distant way he handled the knobs to turn the shower on. The water was fast and hot and immediately felt good on his too-cool skin. Standing there with his face upturned to the stream, he tried to imagine the stress of the week sloughing off him with the wash of the water. There were knots in his neck he knew he had, and hopefully the heat would help that. He didn't much worry about it.

It was easy to let his mind drift. A small bottle of expensive body soap was nearby on the shelf; he grabbed for it with his eyes closed and had no trouble pouring some into his hand.
[01:52] Zarathustra wove: The camera dropped down a little and he stared at the cold black of the case, wondering what he was thinking. He shook his head, lifted the camera again, and started taking near-silent shots. He already knew that he wouldn't be able to use shots like this--they were risque, and not very interesting, because who really cared if Roxas took a shower by his pool? Maybe he'd get to sell these to off-shore website that dished out nude pictures of celebs or something at best. A mag wasn't going to touch it for fear of invasion of privacy.

Roxas was hot. It was fairly obvious why the girls went so fucking crazy over him. The soap glided over his skin, making it shiny, and then turned into suds when the water hit it. All the bubbles sparkled and inched toward the ground, over slim hips, pert ass, strong-looking legs...

Axel swallowed hard and the camera dropped back down again.
[02:04] DualXWielder: Who cared, indeed?

Roxas let his hands wander slowly, feeling the smoothness of the soap beneath his fingers. It was a sensation to get lost in, if he really consentrated on it, and it helped to take his mind off of whatever else was hovering in the background, so that's what he did. He tested the feeling over different parts of his body -- neck, shoulders, chest. The water was droning and the motions were soothing and unconciously he let his head drop forward a little bit. The world was a finite place that existed only inside this shower, and Roxas found he liked it that way. The sigh this time was much less heavy.
[02:09] Zarathustra wove: Voyeur. That was the word to describe him, and he knew it. It was right there on the tip of his tongue. So was perv, pedophile, and other unflattering variations. Roxas was hot, and if legions of old women could wet their panties over him on a daily basis, than this one blip on the screen that was Axel shouldn't have mattered too much. Wasn't like anyone would find out. And it was Roxas' fault anyway, since he was showering and touching himself out in the open like that. Anyone could have come along. Sort of.

So Axel watched Roxas touch the various parts of his body and slowly became conscious of how he was touching himself. The camera was on the ground; he wasn't even holding it. Beneath the parka, his fingers were moving over his own chest, brushing his hard nipples through the fabric of his shirt. When he started petting his dick through his pants, he realized this was Very Very Wrong. He bit his lower lip and cursed himself. It was just one kid, and a high-profile one at that. And a male.
[02:22] DualXWielder: Axel could justify it however he wanted. Most people did. Wasn't really any different than looking at a magazine and lusting, was it? Though magazines were always clothed, and lacked a lot of the sensuality currently going on in the space between eyes and action...

The help was asleep and Roxas was alone here (he thought) so he didn't feel bad about the little fluttery exhale he released when his fingers ran over his own nipples. The water was hot, too hot, and it was making his heart skip beats. Or maybe that was from the slick way the soap made his fingers slide over sensitive skin. He'd masturbated in the shower before, of course, but usually it was a fast in and out sort of thing. Now, though...for some reason, he felt like taking his time. And unconciously his hands moved in a mimic of another pair just like them. There was a spot on his stomach that was particularly sensitive, around his belly button and another on either side of his hips. He alternated between a light touch and a heavy one, enjoying the way the soap made everything tickle just a tiny bit more. He didn't realize how erect he really was until his palm accidentally brushed across the head of his cock and sent a jolt of pleasure through his body so suprisingly intense it made his back arch a little.

Nnn...
[02:27] Zarathustra wove: Axel was dirty, disgusting, a peeping tom. Going to get arrested, definitely. Going to be charged with trespassing and all sorts of other crazy thing that his money probably wouldn't get him out of. He repeated all of this to himself in a mantra, a hot and heavy one, as he undid the buckle of his pants and scooted back while scooting his pants down. Petting himself through his clothes was great and all, but he wanted to touch his cock for real and feel how hard it was, how hard it must have been, just like Roxas'. There was nothing to prop up against, so he'd have to push his pants down, dig his dick out, and crane over it while whacking off right there on the spot.

He might have paid a million dollars to get a chance to slam into that ass in the shower ahead of him, or get the same in return. His pants were damp; he smelled semen already. Oh, god, how was he going to do this without making a sound? He wanted to cry and he pushed at his own stomach between each slow-motion stroke down his cock. It was too slow for him, but he felt compelled to take it slow, to savor this.

"F-F..." Just a rustling noise, the branches, something.
[02:51] DualXWielder: It was okay to be just a little bit more animated when you thought no one was watching. Well, no one ever watched anyway, but that's why you felt safe, right? You could do whatever you wanted because it was private and no one would know...

So Roxas didn't feel guilty when he leaned back to rest his head and pelvis against the heavily polished teak wood of the shower wall. He still had his eyes closed and it made everything seem a little bit more encompassing. The feeling of his hand around his cock was far bigger than anything he could imagine, making his mind expand outward from his body with the sheer pressure to react. He was pretty fucking sure he'd never had a feeling this intense before. Not while masturbating, anyway. With girls it was better, but...nn. His mind was malfunctioning and every time was better than the last, wasn't it?

"Fuck," came the word, quite unbidden. He'd meant to keep his hands moving over his body but now that his hands were on his cock he couldn't bear to move them. He wanted to spread his legs wider but he couldn't because he was sure he'd slip and fall, and there was no bench to sit on. Still, though, he managed to shift enough to slide one hand back between his legs to cup his balls and massage the area of skin right behind. Every time he slid his hand over his cock, he'd move the fingers of the other, and every time little flashes of light exploded in his mind's eye. Wow. The word was right on the tip of his lips but he'd forgotten how to talk and it didn't matter that all that was coming out was little ineffectual grunts. Who the fuck caaaaaared.
[02:57] Zarathustra wove: Axel knew he wasn't going to last very long. There was something weird going on here, because this wasn't normal masturbation, good morning to his morning wood, standing in the shower and just jerking it before work. It was probably the adrenaline rush and the prospect of getting caught and the hot as fuck blonde who was masturbating in front of him that made this feel better than anything he had felt in a long time. He wanted to fuck Roxas so bad and he hunched over further, pumping his dick almost hard enough to bruise it. His balls were begging for attention, to be hefted and palmed, but he was focused on his dick.

When he came, he splattered the bushes in front of him with cum and made a startled noise that he hoped to Christ wasn't audible from this far away. The concern was short-lived, since he needed to learn to breathe again too; he was on fire, every last one of his nerves was burning, and he kept coming with Roxas on the brain. His eyes squeezed shut and he felt so dizzy, dizzy enough to have to lean back onto his elbows when his dick couldn't give any more.
[03:08] DualXWielder: "Ha..." There was a breathless emergency he couldn't stop, he had to cum he NEEDED to cum but he just...couldn't...seem to get to that last step and so he hovered in an agonizingly blissful pain that compelled him to handle himself so roughly that several times his hands launched right of his dick from the force of his pumping and the slick of the soap. There was a stinging around his urethra, a sure sign that the sudsy foam had worked its way too far in, but he didn't care because somehow the pain made it even more exquisite when he slid his hands down over his skin again. He knew his face was contorted in an expression he could never hope to duplicate at any other time, but he didn't care, he didn't give a FUCK, because christ he was cumming and it was so hot so hot, hotter than the water and the air and his breath and his lungs were burning, he couldn't catch his breath and if he squeezed it seemed to go on forever.

"Ah...Ah...AHHHH!" The water was loud but even it didn't mask his screams when his heart stopped for those five or ten or twenty or thirty seconds of mindlessness. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck and there was cum all over the opposite end of the shower wall and he did not care because it was all he could do not to fall forward or to the side or just curl into a little ball and pass out right there.

It was so. Fucking. Hot.
[03:30] Zarathustra wove: Axel stared at the sky as he listened to Roxas' ecstatic screams. If he hadn't been so spent, he might have gotten turned on again. Touching his cock yielded no immediate results, so he wiped his hands off in the grass and sat back up again. Oh, dear. Someone was going to find these splattered bushes at some point. Hopefully it'd rain...

Too dangerous, he thought, wiping sweat from his neck. It was dangerous just being here, and especially dangerous lusting after a celeb like that. Clouded his judgement and all. Unfortunately, he was going to have to camp out in behind the come-sprinkled hedges until he figured out a way to get out of here without being caught.

Those screams were still ringing in his ears.
[03:36] DualXWielder: He came back to himself eventually, his mind picking up the scattered pieces of itself like some sort of dazed wanderer picking his way through a desert. Slitting his eyes open he became suddenly and immediately aware of how annoying the water had become. A feeble hand reached, groped, and turned it off. Luckily he'd been out long enough to be washed pretty clean, considering. The shower was too wet for anything to stick anyway.

He wobbled up on unsteady feet, grabbing again for his towel and leaving the swimsuit behind for the maids to find. Who cared. He was too tired and the world was kind of tingly on the ends of his fingertips. When he breathed too deep he still shuddered just a little bit.

The stairs to the house was ahead of him and the pool was to the right and for a moment he just let his eyes roam over the landscape, not really seeing any of it and unconciously stopping on a section of shrubbery. He stared, and stared, and he didn't know why exactly he was staring until he slowly became aware that he was, and that it had been important, but he didn't know why.

He shook his head to clear it. Strange. The steps were taken steadly, one at a time.
[03:39] Zarathustra wove: Axel had a minor heart attack when Roxas looked that way. Thankfully it was dark enough that his hair was obscurbed by the shrubs and that his eyes didn't gleam in the shadows like a cat's.

When Roxas began moving away, Axel felt kind of disappointed. It was for the best, certainly, but it would have made an entertaining story to tell his coworkers late at night while very, very drunk. Hey, I just jerked off to Roxas behind the bushes on his estate, and then he came and found me. Yeah, I got arrested and locked up for a while with crazy-high bail, but he was naked and it was hot anyway. So Axel felt bereft, watching Roxas go, but didn't dare reveal himself. Even if he wanted Roxas to discover him and then fuck him as punishment, because that was his newest fantasy as of right now.

[03:43] DualXWielder: Fantasies were far better than reality, and much less logical.

Or were they? One thing was for sure -- at least they kept you coming back for more. Roxas entered the house, though something in his back twitched oddly, and he had a fleeting after-image of limbs tangled in a mess of dirt and grass.

Hn. Maybe he wouldn't be sleeping right away.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-06-29T22:30:00

2007-06-30T03:33:02Z

Title: Slaves II
Characters: Axel and Roxas
Type: Plot with sex
Rating: NC-17

salva veritate: Axel was awoken early in the morning, but not by the raj or even anyone close to his position. It was just other servants, other slaves, who woke him up and told him about all the chores and responsibilities he had. He might have been a harem member, but he was no different from other servants, unless the raj had sent a memo telling them to leave Axel alone.

Either way, Axel spent the day trying to keep himself busy. His mind wouldn't stay off of his current situation, though, and how he might escape, talk his way out, so on and so forth. It wasn't until sometime around lunch that he was approached by actual advisors about the raj that he had been shying away from REALLY thinking about.

"You want me to..." He trailed off, not quite believing it. They were firm, of course, and the muscles on the guards beside them were even firmer. The gauzy pants and top were lying there on the bed beside him, along with the chains of bells and baubles and other glittery things.

It was mortifying to wear this stuff. And when he was shoved into the dimly lit throne room and told to dance for the raj, who looked like he was a pretty unhappy water buffalo, Axel did as he was told and was even more mortified.

dualXwielder: Axel would find a fairly unresponsive audience once his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting in the room. The raj was indeed sitting on a throne of silken pillows, but he was facing away from the door, his chin propped up on one curled arm as he stared out of a darkened window. Long moments passed before the trilling of movement and bells made him stir, and when blue eyes finally chanced to gaze upon the uncomfortable dancer before him, those same eyes blinked once -- the boy seemed surprised to see Axel in particular there.

Rousing himself a bit, he glanced around the room. Everyone had been ordered from the room, but it seemed someone was trying to cheer up the poor prince vicariously. It was better than more grandiose attempts made in the past, but he still found himself mildly irritated.

Someone would be spoken to.

Axel was stared at for a long time before the raj motioned at him to stop. "Sit." And just like that, Axel was offered one of the lower cushions. The prince reapplied his chin to his fist, and resumed staring out the window.

salva veritate: Axel looked uncomfortable and embarrassed and scared and all, but he was definitely relieved when Roxas told him that he could stop. Even if there wasn't anyone else in the room to gawk at him. He sat down on the cushion offered to him, folded his hands over his gauzy crotch, and looked at the floor for a while.

The silence bothered him. His eyes kept straying from the floor to Roxas to the window and back again, and his wary curiosity was evident. He was good with reading people, so he knew that this prince was brooding over something dark and deep. And he didn't really feel like he had a right to ask or comfort him or anything like that, so he did something totally crazy and put his cheek on the prince's nearest leg and just held himself like that. Like a concerned pet.

dualXwielder: Axel got the first display of emotion from the raj since he arrived; the boy started at the touch. His head turned to gaze down at the man attached to his leg, and he actually seemed surprised at the sudden display of concern. After all, this new slave had been quite angry when he'd arrived yesterday.

"What's your name?" The question was almost wistful. Often times, slaves were renamed when they were bought or rebought, but the raj seemed interested in what Axel had to say. Precious things were hard to come by, after all

salva veritate: Axel figured that anger wasn't going to get him anywhere. His best bet, as far as he saw into the future, would be to gain the trust of this raj and convince him to give the gift of freedom. Or murder him in his sleep and escape out of the castle. Either or. The latter wouldn't have been a problem for someone like Axel a few days ago, but he still felt a weird thing tugging at his heart strings, telling him that...

"Axel," he said quietly, wondering what sort of new name he'd get--dog, pet, it, whore. He'd suffer debasement and then get out of here, no problem. It was just a matter of biding his time and surviving and playing his cards right, though he had very few to play and no aces up his sleeves this time.

dualXwielder: "Axel," the boy repeated before looking away. He didn't volunteer up his own name, but that wasn't at all surprising. He was royalty, after all. Everyone was meant to call him 'your excellency' and 'your radiance.' It was a wonder he even remembered his own name...it wasn't as though there was anyone left to call him by it anymore.

The raj's face was grim indeed. It only lightened a fraction when he spoke next, some fifteen minutes later, and only enough to make it seem as though he was commenting on the state of the weather.

"It is my birthday today." Axel was, likely, the only person in the entire city who didn't know.

salva veritate: Axel hadn't any idea, but now all the muttering made sense. He blinked a couple of times, listening to the silence that told him absolutely nothing, and pulled his cheek away from the raj's leg.

"Happy birthday," he said, staring at his hands again. Weren't princes supposed to have lavish parties on their birthdays? Fountains of wine, fabulous women, piles of gold, treasures from allies--it seemed like all of that was missing, or maybe he had overlooked it all. "I don't have anything to give you."

Axel knew his name: Roxas. He knew the names of all the leaders of all the world, though he had only met a fraction of them personally. He didn't dare say his name, though, because it was disrespectful to unless permitted. Last thing he needed would be for an already brooding raj to get angry.

dualXwielder: The well-wish wasn't really enlightening; the boy didn't even smile. There was no point, really. People said words because they were obligated to. Obligations made the world go around, in the end. What was it to be wished happy birthday by a slave? A joke, a pity. A nothing. Words were nothing without the feeling to drive them.

It was a laughable thing.

"You may go," he whispered, suddenly remembering why he'd wanted to be alone in the first place. Today was not a day for masks.

salva veritate: Axel squinted at the raj, as if he suddenly remembered something and this revelation was so stark in his head that it hurt even his eyes on the outside. If he still had his dates straight, and if this was indeed Prince Roxas, then today was not only his birthday--it was also an anniversary of something that he doubted anyone talked about within this country's borders. Nonetheless, he got up, because he was being dismissed and didn't want to try anyone's patience.

"I'm sorry," he said, briefly touching the raj's knee before he stepped back, bells jingling, "for your loss."

He meant it, because he knew loss too. The loss of self was incredible.

dualXwielder: The silence was heavy, and with it dragged the thick weight of a few stark tears as they wound their way down his face. So meaningless to be crying over something in the past. It was a horrible weakness. One he knew could mean his ultimate demise. There were always jackals waiting in the shadows, just as they’d been waiting for his twin brother. Who was to say Axel wasn't one come to take him next?

Somehow, though...he knew it didn't matter. It was a sad day, and he was a sad being tired of pretending he was not. Here, in the solitude of private chambers, he could no longer hide the fact he was a boy forced too-fast into adulthood and left alone when that had never been destiny's fate for him. The one person who he’d been born to walk beside forever, who matched him perfectly in every way, was gone.

"Loss is a part of life." He looked very small amidst all those cushions. Almost pathetically so. "Especially here." If you were not strong, you died. Sometimes, you died anyway.

salva veritate: It was a wise and obvious thing for Roxas to say, but he shouldn’t have been saying it--he was too young to have seen all that he had. Axel stared at Roxas, unsure what to do, because what if someone came in and saw Roxas crying with his newest slave standing over him? An odd situation, certainly, but Axel feared that he would be hung or worse for any assumptions that servants and advisors might make.

That didn't stop him from throwing caution to the wind and approaching Roxas again. "Hey," he said quietly, kneeling down in front of Roxas again. "You're still alive. And--being a slave doesn't exactly suit me, but I could be dead or worse. We should be thankful. Even if living hurts, at least hurting means..."

He trailed off. Was he really trying to cheer up a prince that probably didn't give a shit about him anyway? He was just a body--one of many, judging by all the harem members and servants he had seen in just two days. He made a low noise, regretful, and used the gauzy stuff wrapped around his palms to wipe away Roxas' tears.

"I don't mean to talk out of turn," he apologized.

dualXwielder: Blue eye dragged around to meet aquamarine, and the sorrow there was deep and vast and breathtaking. Axel dried away the tears and as he did, the prince's head turned to follow the movement. It was only a moment before he was reaching up to take the hand even as it dropped away. Before Axel knew it, his palm was being applied to a prince's neck in an impromptu caress.

"Do you like me?" The question was soft and wistful and slightly childish and entirely inappropriate, considering its source. What did a raja care if a slave liked him? When did slaves usually like their captors? So far, though, Axel's imprisonment had been anything but ordinary. Somehow, even in a place so formal as a throne room, the prince managed once again to appear to Axel as he really was -- a young man desperately longing for an affection and companionship he'd lost.

salva veritate: Axel hadn't been expecting a question like that. His fingers moved against Roxas' neck, stroking the fine blonde hairs there and brushing over any necklaces the kid might have been wearing, and it could have been considered a true caress. He stared, affected to the point of shock by those free blue eyes, and he didn't know where he was for a second. What was up and down?

"You're nice to me when you don't have to be," he replied. You're hurting all over, he thought and shifted forward to get closer to those pained eyes. Roxas smelled nice, like those oils that he had used on Axel last night. It was intoxicating, like the smell of opium. "I think. I do. You smell good."

dualXwielder: That was a funny reason to like someone. Just because they smelled good? The faintest flicker of a smile wiped across his face and left lingering trails of brilliance in its wake. What a silly thing to say.

"You're a very beautiful thing." He didn't call Axel a thing in a debasing way, rather...like a strain of music, or a painting. He was touching Axel in that forthright way again, unafraid, uncaring of personal space. Across the temple. Across the forehead. As though memorizing the lines of his face by touch.

salva veritate: Axel didn't like Roxas because he smelled good--did he not hear the first thing Axel had said? Obviously the poor prince stopped listening when he was depressed and turned too inward. That whole thing about smell was a kind of distracted comment that Axel felt prudent to make, if only so he'd see Roxas look amused and actually smile.

"And you look better when you smile," he said, trying not to tease and failing. If only so he wouldn't focus on the fingers moving over his skin, memorizing him, and Axel felt hot and then cold wherever Roxas touched--except on his face, where he was flushing. This piece of art was variable.

dualXwielder: The prince smiled a little wider then, and it seemed wonders did not cease, because the smile was almost shy, in a way. Compliments were a regular thing for those in power, but real ones suffused with intimacy likely were not. Blue eyes glanced to the floor for a moment before looking back; equilibrium had been regained, and the faint rosy tint to his cheeks had died down.

The gossamer trails were lifted and fingered thoughtfully. "Who told you to wear these?" He asked in an almost detached way, thoughtful, as though he was seeing them for the first time. They were beautiful, certainly, but the prince didn't believe one should cover art.

salva veritate: The prince was blushing? Axel hardly believed it, and just like that, he was no longer afraid of angering him. It wasn't about losing respect for Roxas, who had let his facade slide away enough for tears and flushes, but about realizing that Roxas was too young and too human for his position. He wet his lips as he watched the color ebb, but not drain away completely, giving Roxas a healthier color compared to his earlier pallor.

"One of your advisors," Axel said, looking down at his costume as if for the first time too, "whose name I wasn't told."

He might as well have been naked, because practically all of it was see-through. The clothing was a haze of color rather than a covering and slid embarrassingly over his smoother portions whenever he moved, which he wasn't right now. He looked somewhat self-conscious.

dualXwielder: Fingers slid over the soft silkiness, feeling the warmth of skin through too-thin covering. The raj was no longer looking into Axel's face but rather over that body, all to perfectly displayed beneath its curtain. His eyes followed his hands and much like he had with Axel's features, he seemed to be memorizing and finding the curves and lines of Axel's body.

How unnerving.

"Would you like to kiss me?" The question was almost...offhand. Like he'd asked for Axel's opinion on the drapes. But even if he was a boy, there were some things his upbringing would never allow him to do. Asking permission to kiss a slave was one of them. Giving permission, however, was perfectly acceptable.

salva veritate: Question met question: "Do you want me to kiss you?" Axel asked, trying to focus on the words and not the feel of Roxas' hands moving over him. There were these hollows along his back and especially around his hips where Roxas' fingers would dip down, and once touched there, Axel would flinch and avert his eyes every time. It wasn't a flinch of pain or irritation.

Axel's skin was warm--almost too warm, especially when the fabric was rubbing over it and trapping the heat in. It was hot in here. Or maybe that was just Roxas, haha, who wasn't looking so forlorn and small on this cushion as he had earlier.

dualXwielder: Roxas had been trying to give Axel a bit of leeway, since he'd been so skittish about being approached before. Taken advantage of, and all. Axel was playing coy now, though, and Roxas wasn't a coy sort of person. At least, not unless he was the one doing the cloying.

So, instead of wandering around his body the hands came up to palm his face. There was a long moment of silence in which the raj searched those green eyes for something deep and unnamable. Axel would likely get lost in that gaze before he realized he was even being caught up in a deep and soft kiss.

salva veritate: That made Roxas a hypocrite, which was only suitable for royalty, after all. Axel wouldn't have been surprised that Roxas didn't respect coquetry from anyone but himself. In the back of his mind, he realized that he was being warned and wondered if he could have said no and if the raj would have accepted that no, I don't want to kiss you. Probably not. It wasn't like Axel could stop him.

There was a lot in Axel's eyes, but not all of it was in immediate view. Was the raj good at reading people, especially ones usually as guarded as Axel? It took a special kind of person to read his lust, his homesickness, his intoxication. Roxas smelled good--too good and too warm. When they kissed, Axel didn't think before opening his mouth and melting into the raj like this was the first real kiss he had ever gotten.

dualXwielder: The kiss wasn't innocent, but it wasn't filled with rampant lust, either. There was want there, certainly, but it was a finely tuned emotion, refined and pure in its strength. And it had a lot of strength.

Axel didn't seem inclined to make any moves other than melting, which was probably to be expected, but even still the raj's arms moved forward, the one not occupied at Axel's face pulling around to palm against the small of Axel's back. After a few moments the kiss was broken, and Roxas sat still on the pillowy cushions looking deep into those eyes again. It was probably safe to say a little bit of all those hidden things were ferreted out and seen.

"Would you go home, if you could?" Was it a test? Maybe. Or maybe the raj was just weighing his options. He wasn't interested in courting a slave who wasn't willing to give him what he really wanted. Why set oneself up to be crushed again when Axel was only planning to continue his attempts at escape? Fingers reached up to toy at the edges of his hair.

salva veritate: The question threw Axel, who had been confused and allured by the strength of want and restraint in that kiss. It probably took a lot to make the prince really want something enough to go wild for it and Axel doubted he could unlock that with just a simple kiss. He had been busy thinking about that and licking at the one string of saliva between them when, asked, his eyes opened a little wider.

He sat back on his haunches as best he could, but Roxas was holding onto his neck. "What am I here?" he countered, tilting his head toward the fingers in his hair. His eyes were dark with thoughts. "I'm nothing. Nobody. I'm one of your hundreds of slaves that you could kiss if your majesty pleased. And I could be murdered in my sleep here and no one would care."

Such things were not unheard of. Jealous harem slaves turning on one another?

If anything, Axel was a firm believer in quid pro quo: if I'm more than dirt, then maybe there's something worth staying for. It wasn't like he really enjoyed where he came from; he missed it because that was where he came from, which everyone did. He only had his job as family and his government to say goodbye to, although being another face in the crowd didn't appeal to him either.

dualXwielder: The prince stared at him for a long time, and it was hard to discern what was going on inside his head. Not having a harem was simply unheard of; harems were what princes had, and he was a prince. The only prince, the last of his line. Even his own brother had been murdered, his twin, and he had been worth more than every soul inside this castle. The raj had more to fear from ill-doers who coveted his position than Axel did, who was merely a lowly palace slave. And a new one at that.

But there was one thing that separated Axel from all the rest of the crowd. "I choose you." The three words were simple and succinct, and if Axel didn't know the raj's history they might not mean very much. Fact of the matter was, though, there were rooms upon rooms of people in this palace he had never once seen or met or touched, and yet here Axel was in the prince's throne room, the only one allowed to be in his presence on the most emotional day of his year.

"I did not choose them. I wouldn't let them hurt you." If they did....

Unfortunate for their lives, indeed.

salva veritate: "Is it because I have red hair?"

Axel's slavers had commented endlessly on his hair color and how much money they would be able to get out of some rich noble or king. Axel hadn't seen anyone with hair like his in this country and he doubted the raj had any slaves that were as unique visually as he was. But that question wasn't really weighing on his mind--it was Why do you choose me? that he was hinting at, but couldn't work his mouth into saying. He didn't ask that explicitly because he was afraid of the answer, but because maybe this nice warmth between them would go away when they would be forced to explain the matters of the heart.

dualXwielder: The raj was a ruler but he was not a liar. He nodded gently, but there was a hint of a smile at his lips. "Your hair...." That hand reached around to touch the soft pads of skin just below Axel's eyelashes. "And your eyes."

Axel's eyes were green. That was unusual too, wasn't it? Perhaps not the best answer...if it weren't for the fact that the raj wasn't talking about the color of his eyes at all. Axel'd been right when he'd observed that he was the only one who'd had any fire left, any desire to fight. He'd been a bright spark in the midst of a pile of dead wood. He had eyes that were angry at the world and hurt and afraid and alone. He had eyes the raj understood.

The raj believed people looked the way they looked because of their quality of characters on the inside. Axel's character was, in a word, striking.

"They burn."

salva veritate: Axel blinked from the touch and then blinked again from the answer once it was rectified. He would have admitted being disappointed if it were only his appearance, because then the slavers would have been right and all there was to him for these foreigners to want would be his hair, his eyes, the paleness of his skin like the royalty's but not quite. Rectification came in those final two words, which made Axel blink and tilt his head some, peering at the raj from behind a couple strands of that striking hair that had fallen over his forehead.

"Yours do too," he said slowly. He already knew this, had already seen the raj's anger and loneliness and general desolation, but he was pointing it out aloud.

The question now on his mind was whether or not he wanted to stay for this kindred spirit in an alien world under alien circumstances. Even if he wanted to be freed, he doubted he would be, and would earn the raj's scorn on top of that. To be the raj's chosen one...

He gently kissed Roxas without permission, because fire was reckless like that.

dualXwielder: It wasn't a stretch to say that the raj was desperate for affection. He was strong, but he was also oh so fragile, broken once and twice and cracked and not ready to be shattered again. It was unfair that someone so young should have to grow up alone in a palace surrounded by people. But then again it was unfair that people starved in the streets of the city, or that others lived out their lives as slaves. That was how life was, just as the raj said.

You found solace where you could. Right now there was solace in the kiss he deepened to the point of breathlessness, because it seemed Axel had made his choice, at least temporarily. There was always the chance he would grow bored and try to take flight, but if that was the case then Roxas would simply have to ply him with enough reasons to stay....

One of which was not the gauzy pieces of fabric that were currently being pushed from his body. Axel was pulled further up onto the dais, almost atop the prince's lap, and when the kiss was broken his eyes weren't simply burning, they were smoldering.

"Dance for me." It was less a command and more a request, and it was plain the prince did NOT want Axel to move away to do his 'dance'.

salva veritate: Axel could have sworn that he could see the cracks in Roxas for a few seconds there, somewhere between his lungs burning for oxygen and the gulps of air he took after the kiss broke. He touched the places where the fissures were fading but not gone entirely, the scars hidden in the tension of his muscles and all over his face. He was so overheated and Roxas was touching him too, pushing away the damnable fabric that didn't know how to breathe despite being manufactured in this hot, dry place. Life was unfair, but Axel decided it would be more unfair if he didn't give this life a chance. If Roxas really wanted him, then he'd show it..

He stuck out his tongue in a silly way at the prince's request. He could dance all the prince wanted, rubbing and rutting against him, rotating his hips this way and that, humming some foreign, some from-far-away song under his breath. And that was what he did, but at some point, he touched his own stomach and then slid his hand down, because he knew the prince was watching and he wanted to make his dance more gratuitous and teasing than it already was.

dualXwielder: Blue was not a color associated with heat, typically, a cold color fed by ice. But the prince's eyes were definitely not cold as he watched his dancer's face, as he gripped those hips and pulled them close against him as they moved. They were not cold at all, but heated and intense and scathing, a color that sucked you in and made you lose your breath and drown.

When Axel reached down the prince's eyes followed, but at the last moment his hand wasn't allowed to finish its path. The prince grabbed it by the wrist and the palm that wrapped around the straining erection was not his own, but the prince's itself. One thumb curled around the head and pillowed into the slit, only just beginning to dampen, and there was an eager fire that kept his fingers clamped there as Axel moved his hips and that heat slid in and out of Roxas' well-made fist.

salva veritate: Axel's murmured song faltered and then faded when Roxas grabbed his cock like that. There was a hiss of pain and arousal, maybe, but for the most part he made these tortured sounds of pleasure as he grabbed onto the nearest parts of Roxas--arms, shoulders--for leverage. He barely missed a beat in his dance and quickly caught up, fucking Roxas' dry fist as he did so, and wondered when the last time he had masturbated was. In between bureaucracy and bureaucratic missions outside of his country, it had been a while.

He made his own fists, grabbing nothing, and whined when Roxas wasn't teasing the head of his cock or he had to close his own eyes against the heat or he was just whining, actually, begging to be fucked wordlessly because he didn't know what he was saying at all. Princely skin is so soft, he noticed somewhere in the part of his mind that wasn't frying.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-06-27T23:24:00

2007-06-28T04:26:16Z

Title: Slaves
Characters: Axel and Roxas
Type: Plot with mild innuendo.
Rating: R

salva veritate: Axel had been angry before. Plenty of times. It came with being a relatively important person in his nation--not on a presidential cabinet or a dictator's court or anything, but he was still respected and leaders still listened to his opinion. But he had never imagined that visiting another continent on a diplomacy mission would end up like this: kidnapped. He had been kidnapped. And Axel was really, really mad.

His kidnappers didn't sugar-coat anything: he wasn't going to be killed for a political statement or anything like that, like regular terrorists would, but rather sold into slavery, because he was foreign and pretty and pale, and more importantly had red hair, which was rare in these parts. Assholes. Axel was mean and nasty, and had to be beat or drugged to calm down, both of which severe or well-hidden so as to not leave scars and other disgusting marks on his skin that buyers would reject.

DualXWielder: All the slaves came through the palace first. It was no secret that the best and most beautiful slaves lost themselves inside the palace walls and never came out. That was the nature of a ruling body -- the most exotic furs, the best spices, the loveliest artisan works -- all of it was picked over by rulers first, and lords second, leaving the remaining to be divided into the general populace. At least, those who could afford it.

Not many could.

Of course, it didn't help that this raja was too rich for his own good. Not that spending one's life as a palace servant was all that bad. Alternatively, having a opulent room and delicious meals was a natural preference to the living conditions many of the slaves ended up again. Most of the harem wasn't even visited on a regular basis. Mainly, the raja himself was obsessed with one thing, and it was not physical intimacy, but rather keeping up appearances. And appearances stated he have a large and expensive cadre of Beautiful Things.

This day was different. This slave was special. The raja rarely ever stopped to choose the slaves -- he'd delegated that task out to one of his advisors, and they always picked the best ones. Axel, though...well. Chance to be seen as he was led down the hall in a filed line. He likely would have been taken anyway. But he was special. Because the raja himself saw him, and the raja himself picked him out.

"That one. I want that one." And then -- "Put him in the upper quarters." For those were the quarters the raja actually, occasionally, chose to visit. When he felt like it, of course. Apparently, he felt like it today.

salva veritate: Axel looked sullen, angry, vicious, and somewhat drugged compared to the rest of the slaves, which were silent, stoic, and tamed. He kind of struggled against his bonds, but not enough to get slapped for it, because his skin hurt and yet somehow hadn't bruised. It didn't matter to him that this fucking raja--funny, he might have eventually met this guy as an emissary and not a slave at some point in the future--picked him over the others. He didn't give a shit. At all.

So he was led (read: half-dragged) up to the upper quarters, which he also didn't care about, and he tried to bite one of the servants or advisors or whatever that brought him there. And once he was left there, he was hopefully still bound, because otherwise he destroyed the first piece of furniture he could get his hands on, or tore up the pillows, or something. Fuck, he screamed in his head.

And when the raja came in, Axel was crouched in the corner and glaring.

DualXWielder: Actually, the raja was waiting for HIM. He was sitting beneath the window, on a seat made expressly for that purpose and built into the wall. When Axel came in he did not immediately look over, waiting instead until the guards had left. Finally, when they had, the prince looked over.

The first thing Axel would likely notice was how incredibly young the raja was. Almost too young to hold a harem. But perhaps that explained why they were rarely visited. The next thing he would notice was how absolutely golden he was. Whereas commoners in this country were denoted as dark skinned and dark haired, the inbreeding of royalty produced a very pure strain of barely-tanned, golden-haired children, of which this child was the brightest of all. He regarded Axel with an open, if not blunt, curiosity. He seemed unaffected by Axel's anger.

"Are you thirsty?" he asked politely, somehow oblivious to the fact Axel was tied and nearly naked and looked as though he'd been dragged through the streets. (He probably had.)

salva veritate: It was a good thing Axel was well-versed in the languages of the world, but he still stared at Roxas with one of those austere stares that suggested he had no idea what the FUCK he had just been asked. Might as well have spoken Greek to him. Was this kid a moron? Raja or no raja, he wasn't fit to run a petty candy gambling ring in the streets if he was going to ask questions that daft. Fuck, he thought anyway.

It was pretty shocking that this kid did look so different compared to his captors and the other people he had seen in the palace thus far. It didn't soothe his anger that Roxas looked so innocuous. It just made him stare and blink once, very slowly, like he had to think to blink.

"Let me go," he said. It would have been nice and articulate, but he had a gag in his mouth.

DualXWielder: Asking if Axel was thirsty was daft? Well, the boy didn't seem to think so. He was merely trying to see to his new slave's comfort. Axel was regarded with a inquisitive if detached stare, as though his anger was entirely wasted. Somehow, the words were understood, as though he had read Axel's mind.

"I shan't let you go until I am certain you won't hurt yourself. The guards are positioned outside the door. They are trained to return at the slightest sign of distress. If I untie you, it would be unwise to seem distressed." Though his words were gentle, it was obvious he was laying down a very subtle rule. If Axel wanted to live, he'd calm down a bit.

"I have fruit," he finished placidly. "It's very good."

salva veritate: Axel closed his eyes, because he refused to look at someone that made him feel like an animal in a zoo. But wasn't that what being part of a harem was all about? Cages full of willing or unwilling sex partners. Fantastic. He was really looking forward to this and struggling to preserve his very quickly waning freedom.

"Fine," he mumbled petulantly and gagged when the rough, sweaty cloth touched his tongue. He was gross all over: dirty, disheveled, mostly naked, tired, stressed. He probably had a few gray hairs by now.

Fine, he'd play nice, and eat some retarded fruit, and figure out how to talk his way out of here. He was good at talking. The only unfortunate thing was that Roxas was very attractive; why couldn't they have met under different circumstances?

DualXWielder: The prince wasn't ogling Axel so much as staring at him curiously. His face, so guarded and emotionless at any other time, was now actually openly curious, and the unspoken statement of I've never seen anyone like you was horribly easy to read. Blonde hair ruffled freely as he stood and moved over to remove the gag first, and then the ropes around his hands. Axel was left to rub the sensation back in his fingers, and whenever he cared to turn around, he would not find a pushy raja waiting to sexually molest him. No, instead that selfsame raja seemed to be drawing him an incredibly warm bath in a pool inlaid into the floor, surrounded by gossamer thin curtains. The steam was a palpable presence in the room.

"Please." It was the only word he spoke as he motioned to the water, before moving to a small table and pouring a glass of the clear liquid and bringing that and a plate of exotic fruit to the side of the pool.

Was the prince this kind to all his guests? Well, Axel would never know.

salva veritate: Axel was not someone who trusted easily, which was just part of his job description as a government employee. He didn't want to trust this raja, who had purchased him like he was a piece of meat at the butcher's, but some sixth sense that rarely affected him was tingling and making him see that hey, look what he's doing for you. what a gentlemen. does he treat all his whores this well?

Once his wrists were freed, he rubbed at them until the painful tingling sensation went away and didn't attempt to murder the raja or destroy something. He definitely trusted what the raja had said about the guards stationed outside the door; he'd need to be quiet and pleasant, at least on the outside, and leave his destruction for later. The water did look very inviting, as did the cool water and the fresh fruit, and he was torn between being a difficult little bitch and actually cleaning himself up. He chose the latter as a matter of principle.

He got up, trying to be mindful of his nakedness, and headed over to the tub, which he climbed into. "Thanks," he said quietly, trying not to flush or anything with the curious way that Roxas was looking at him. Not like a piece of meat, maybe, but like a piece of art.

DualXWielder: Maybe he'd hit the nail on the head when he thought that. Maybe that was the look in the boy's eye. A one of a kind piece of irreplaceable art. Surely that would explain why the prince reached over to dip a soft cloth in a velvety scented oil, why he began to gently apply this cloth to Axel's skin over his chest and arms and shoulders, why when he'd done this, he then applied the mixture to his hands and subsequently in a massage to the depths of Axel's hair. The scent was thick and rich and exotic, like the fruits on the plate, and throughout the whole exchange the boy never said a word.

Maybe the boy was lonely, or maybe he just new a precious thing when he saw one. Either way, it'd be hard to stay angry in the face of such attentive and single-minded ministrations. Like a child dressing a doll.

"Where did you come from?" came the question at last, in that same curious tone as before, as in that gaze.

salva veritate: In a word, it was nice. For a second there, somewhere between the scalp massage and the damp smell of fruit, Axel forgot that he was the slave here. Surely princes wanted the members of their harem to be pretty and smell nice, but how often did said princes do it themselves? Weren't there advisors and lesser servants and even other harem members to do this? Axel would have bet money that there were, so why... mmm..

He opened his eyes and realized that his mouth was kind of open in pleasure. How embarrassing. He flushed along his chest and up his neck, not quite to his cheeks of course, and his mouth snapped shut so fast that his teeth clicked. Stare. A slightly bewildered, embarrassed stare. Where was his anger? Damn it. He wasn't a doll, but having his hair touched like that made him feel so good, arrrghhhhhmmm.

"Far away," he said, sounding a little distracted. His accent wasn't too bad for being from so far away. "The other side of the world."

DualXWielder: "You're alone. Like me." It was a simple statement of fact, and yet it carried enough weight as to be burdensome. Suddenly the state of the country was put into sharp relief in the short span of four simple words. The prince was so young, barely out of boyhood, and yet he was the ruling body of an entire country.

Because there was no one else.

Axel would not be able to see the faint, small smile on the cherubic face as the raja stroked his fingers down and through heavy, damp hair one more time before reaching down to cup water in his hands and rinse away the excess. "You must eat, if you are hungry."

salva veritate: How could Axel turn down hospitality like that? And from someone whom he felt a lot closer to all of the sudden. This made no sense to him, but things had stopped making sense the second a darkly grinning man beat him over the head with a club from behind and abducted him into this out-in-the-open underground of slavery. He stared at Roxas, still looking kind of perplexed, and ducked his head a little. Shy? Angry?

"Okay," he agreed and his eyes slid over to the plate of fruit. He moved over to the side of the tub and reached for the plate of fruit, where he picked out one at random and popped it into his mouth to munch quietly.

Maybe he didn't see the smile, but he heard it with that weird sense of his. He didn't know if he should be paranoid or what.

DualXWielder: The hair rinsed, Axel would become aware of a finger beneath his chin, pulling his gaze and face to the side to stare into the honey-gold of a too-bright prince. He was looking, but not in an appraising way. There was even a certain amount of innocence there. Axel had expected to have sex forced upon him, but the only thing present in this exchange was the light, chaste kiss to his shoulder. Almost...respectful. Like a courting beau to a lover.

With that, the raja stood. He did not bow, but instead walked toward the door with the slight ruffle of expensive silks. "I hope you rest well." That was it? That was all? It seemed so. Apparently, all of Axel's first impressions and assumptions had been mostly, if not altogether entirely, false.

He was being left to his own devices for the evening, it seemed.

salva veritate: Axel stared dumbly at the raja’s eyes and realized they were beautiful--not the ugly muddy brown of all the commoners and slaves here, but rather blue, like the freedom of a summer sky. Freedom that Axel would probably never have again in that sense of the word. And when Roxas kissed his shoulder, he didn't recoil or lash out. He shivered.

"Th..." anks, was what he couldn't say, because his tongue got heavy and he wasn't really thinking straight anyway.

It wasn't until Roxas left that Axel realized he was really, really turned on. And Roxas would have been able to see that if he looked beneath the surface of the steamy, kinda cloudy with oil water. What the fuck.

Axel wondered if the raja could spy on him while he was left to these "devices."

Drabbles: The Organization

2007-04-12T05:38:03Z

The Twelve Teeth in the Key of Destiny

The Enigmatic Man

He was not allowed to release his keyblade. If he lost his focus or if the hilt was dropped or if the black abyss of unconsciousness flooded his vision and the weapon began to dissipate, an intense agony would situate itself inside his chest, a parasite of breath and thought and being, and even the oblivion of nothingness was no escape from it. On these days, if the torture became too much or the fatigue too great, he was cured just enough to keep him from passing out. On these days, he learned not to eat, because inevitably the food would end up an ugly brown stain on the pristine white floor, a humiliating testament to his weakness.

He learned to dread these days.

“For the weak, there is death.” Even in his dreams, years later, he would hear that voice. It rang out from nowhere and everywhere at once; it was in his head and through his body, it was a jagged vibration through his bones. The hood always obscured the face of the man who spoke, but he knew who it was. You listen to the voice that names you.

Only your god can name you.

“You are nothing. You were born to fight. Every other ambition, every other desire you have, is the worthless echo of a forgotten life.” In one regular exercise, he would be chained to a wall. He was taught how to make shields with the light that coursed through him in this way – first, searing bolts were flung, and if he did not deflect them, his flesh was burned. And again. And again. And again. He learned quickly to summon a protective barrier to himself, but even after days and weeks and months, sometimes…he would miss. Occasionally, his dreams would smell of rancid, burning flesh and the stink of charred hair. Those nights he’d wake himself up with this own gagging.

“This is your home. There is no other place for you. There is no other purpose for you. You are a soldier, and that is all.” Another implement they pitted him against was illusion: other members, raids of dusks, Heartless, the Real. They would come in wave after wave after wave, and they did not stop, even when his hands were blistered so horribly the blood dripped through his gloves to smear on the ivory of the floor. In his room he often peeled off the leather only to take the skin covering the palms of his hands with it.

Only at the end of the session did the black phantom, the Other, come. If he defeated it, he was allowed to sleep without punishment. If he did not, the outcome varied. He never remembered the penalty; only the searing behind his eyes immediately after it began. On those days he would awaken in his room and even the fresh burn of the bile evacuating his throat could not distract from the agony of his body. Sometimes he would find blood, or fresh wounds, but not often. There were worse things than bleeding. Far worse.

“You are Roxas. You are Number Thirteen. One day, they will come for you. You will fight, or you will disappear.”

He hated this man, this self-appointed god, and he fantasized about what it would feel like to bring the cold black steel of his weapon singing down through the flesh of his throat. But more than that, he would not disappear.

Roxas shouldered his keyblade, and began the fight again.

The Freeshooter

He would pick his nails with the point of a knife twice as long as his index finger but not as sharp as the lines of his face. The flesh of the scars crisscrossing his features was pink, a new pink, the pink of an infant's skin or a newly healed wound. His hair made him look older than he was.

"Y'wanna know how to get out of here alive, kid?"

Sometimes his hands would slip, and the edge of the knife would dive into the soft pads of his fingers. He never winced. Slowly, methodically, he peeled the halves of the severed wound apart and watched the blood drip down into his curled palm.

"Tell me," was always Roxas' answer, who had never seen the man's hand slip with a knife at any other time.

"Don't breathe."

The Whirlwind Lancer

The forest was lush and warm, making the weight of the coats they wore ponderous, heavy and uncomfortable. Overhead birdsong curled around and through the foliage to mingle with the light of the sun as it fell. Even the wind was humid when stirred, causing the ends of his long black hair to wave in a snakelike dance as the metallic point of a wickedly sharp lance whizzed past his ear. It sunk, quivering, into the wood of a tree several feet away, a long violet exclamation point amidst greens and reds and browns.

"I dislike noise," he said, and continued to walk. When the lance dissipated, Roxas watched the feathered body it impaled fall from the wood of the tree with a heavy thud, trailing multicolored feathers behind it like a radiant afterthought.

The Chilly Academic

"Does this hurt?" was the question immediately preceding something that always, always hurt.

"No," Roxas lied, in spite of whatever was spiking into his flesh or sending a plume of carcinogenic smoke up from his body. The examination table was the only surface kept free of equipment. Everything else was covered with machinery, vials, fluids, tubes and piles of forgotten and discarded notes. The room smelled faintly of sulphur, and not so faintly of the metallic bite of cold steel. The lights were too-bright and he never blinked.

“Have you remembered anything since your last examination?” Whenever he leaned in close, Roxas would feel the tickle of heavy blonde hair against his body. It was cold and lifeless and faintly oily, and the only thing in the lab that made him release an involuntary shudder.

“No,” he said again, even as the dream from the night before was recalled to his mind. Boats. An ocean. The distant cry of gulls.

He had to be careful now, not to summon both of the blades whenever he summoned the one. The black weight of Oblivion was handed to the scientist, who inspected it with a careless eye. Behind the thin veil of reality, Roxas could still feel the other one waiting there, humming, like a dog anticipating a call.

Stay.

“Well, everything seems to be in order. If you remember anything…you will let me know…”

“Yes,” he lied for the third time, and somewhere a rooster crowed.

He knew these examinations were only an excuse.

The Silent Hero

He was big, too big, bigger than anyone there, and sometimes Roxas caught him bending slightly as he went through doors: a secretive, furitive movement that made him wonder what emotion the man might be feeling the remembered echo of -- shame, or irritation. He was gone often, and they said he was working on building the Other Place, but they never really spoke of what that Other Place was. Roxas wondered if he was building doors in that place he wouldn't have to duck in order to go through.

When he was present, many times he found the giant speaking in the hallways, and Roxas suspected it was to save himself the face of having to enter a room and bow his back to an inanimate object. He was proud and tall and whenever Roxas walked by, he could still feel himself eclipsed by the man's lengthy shadow long after the murmuring resumed and they stopped watching him pass. For such a large man, he had a very soft voice, and Roxas could never hear what it was he was talking about.

He always looked at him in that way, like he was a puzzle that was almost solved.

The Cloaked Schemer

"Do you really think that he cares for you?"
"He told me he did."
"You're a fool if you believe that. He lies."
"I believe him."
"Would you believe him if I told you he says that to everyone?"
"You lie, too."
"True. But at least I'm up front about it."
"How noble of you."
"Indeed. Tell me, if he cares so much for you, has he told you about Sora?
Sora.
"Ah. I can see by your face the answer is no. Well, don't believe me. Ask him for yourself. After all...

...I'm just a liar."

The Luna Diviner

You know why everyone respects him? I'll tell you. Because he's the one they send to deal with you if you fail. And out of all of us, out of everyone? He is the only one who shows true emotion.

He takes pleasure in watching your pain. Remember that. And whatever you do, don't scream.

The Flurry of Dancing Flames

He couldn't remember who'd portaled into who's room first -- it long ago ceased to be a violation and instead became an expected practice. He always made up some excuse when he did it, saying he came to check on quarters, or to see if he was healing properly. Strangely enough the touches had never been unwelcome ones. He had eyes Roxas understood, eyes he could decipher. They were guarded and cold and calculating, but underneath all that they were something else.

Alone.

He didn't say anything when Roxas climbed into his bed and curled up next to him to sleep. The silence stretched on, stiff and dark, until one hand was moved to drape across his body just underneath the curve of his chest. The room was always stifling and hot -- there was no need for blankets.

"You can't keep doing this, you know," he said without really meaning it.

"I know."

Sometimes it happened the other way around.

The Melodious Nocturne

"Wanna know why I don't like to fight?" They were sitting on a rocky ledge overlooking a curtain of water. Below, the mist churned up into the air to form a wet, damp cloud that clung to everything. He could smell it even from here, the earthy, fresh smell of damp, and it made the twilight of gathering evening seem that much deeper.

"Sure." He had a leaf he was shredding, an oversized elephant ear that he tore into different length strips. He tested each one between his thumbs before releasing it, letting the brisk, high-pitched note ring out over the chasam once before watching the slice of green fall, fall, fall down to disappear into the chilly pillowy water below.

"Because I like to live more."

Roxas secretly thought he was the smartest of everyone.

The Gambler of Fate

He didn't understand the game.

The Ace could be high or low, one or fourteen, caused your hand to both win or lose. If you lined the numbers consecutively it was good, but better if they were of the same mind, and they almost never were. The higher the numbers the better you sat, which was never true in real life, and the ten was the last card before Royalty. The Queen, the only female, could kill you if you held her too long, and the Jack could sometimes do everything, sometimes do nothing, and was always, always made out to be the fool.

"What about the king?" he said, watching as a card was held up depicting the image of a man weilding a sword. He was old and the blade was blunt and he held it with all the seriousness of a man leading his troops to war.

"Why, the king?" the gambler asked, his smile widening so far as to almost split his face in half. "The King is Thirteen."

The Graceful Assassin

He saw the girl only once, as she was being lead away by the guidance of his heavy hand on her shoulder. She was short, and looked too-pale and too-frail, whiter than the white walls of the castle they lived in, so white as to blend in and disappear and make you forget you'd ever seen her. But he wouldn't forget, he'd never forget -- her eyes were shockingly blue, a color he knew couldn't possibly exist in reality, a blue so deep it hurt to look them, and he was sure he'd seen a blue like that somewhere before in his dreams.

"Did you like my pretty flower?" he asked the next day, and walked laughing down the hall, as though he had just told every joke ever created within the short span of six easy words.

The Savage Nymph

"Do you know why I'm the only woman here?" Watching her fight was like watching a string of music in fluid motion: everything about her bled liquid electricity. She produced the knives from nowhere, pulled them out of nothingness, out of the air, she wove them through her fingers and made intricate patterns that dazzled your eyes as she lunged. Her movements were wild and reckless and still they held a calculation to them, the slow and measured thought of a lioness stalking its prey.

The air whistled when she sent the knives cutting through it. They always hit the mark of her target, no matter how far away it was. Head. Heart. Stomach.

He knew why she was the only woman.

"Because they're afraid," he responded, and she would reward him with a wide, predatory smile.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-04-11T03:40:00

2007-04-11T08:40:27Z

Title: Rememberance
Characters: Axel and Roxas
Type: Yaoi
Rating: NC-17

Axel: It was nice and warm up here. The sun was directly in his face, just the way Axel liked it, and he squinted against the glare of it over the mountain ridges in the distance. Perpetual twilight painted him with a multitude of reds and oranges, making his pale skin darker and his hair darkest. His popsicle stick had more or less been picked clean, but he still licked the wooden edge of it and got maybe one or two splinters on the tip of his tongue. It didn't really hurt.

They had been silent for a couple of minutes, having lapsed since beginning to eat. Axel usually had peace offerings like this for all of the new members--at least the cute ones--and this "Roxas" was no exception. He almost wished he had drugged the popsicles somehow, because his hollow insides were starting with ache. Maybe if he could get Roxas to look at him, and see his unsaid intentions, then...

Well, for the moment he just leaned on his knee and stared at the kid without trying to make it obvious. Roxas. The name of an ANgel, certainly.

Roxas: The staring was a little more than obvious, but he didn’t mind. Once or twice he’d looked over to give the man a faint but nonetheless pleasant smile in response to his staring. It was lucky that the sun made his face look ruddy anyway, because he disliked the way Axel’s gaze automatically made his cheeks feel hot. The man had showed him what he could do with fire. Roxas wondered if he was making his cheeks feel that way on purpose. Could he do that?

“Did you like the ice cream?” he asked, because they’d lapsed into silence after talking about this and that and everything. Axel was the second member of the Organization he’d met, and he found he liked him infinitely more than Xemnas.Axel’d seemed surprised to see him, or perhaps he’d been surprised at his age, Roxas couldn’t really tell. Whatever it was, it hadn’t seemed to matter much as Roxas had shown him around. Did all the people seem this eager to look around a town? Roxas didn’t understand why it was that big of a deal.

Not that he’d minded....

Axel: Roxas' smiles were encouraging, which made Roxas a fool for giving them out so willingly. Axel was still a master of finding and exploiting weaknesses, especially those of the new members. Of course, whether he knew it or not right now, Roxas' smiles were instilling a weakness in him. He briefly licked his lower lip, the end of the popsicle stick, and then let the stick drop off of the tower. It tumbled through the air and disappeared. What a litter bug!

"It tastes great," Axel said, dusting his hands off. "Do you?"

... Slip of the tongue? Does yours, he meant?? Oh dear.

Maybe Axel was surprised that Roxas was so young. He was definitely the youngest member, this number thirteen. Demyx was the closest and yet still years off. It didn't help that he had a preference for... younger... people. Yes.

Roxas: His brow furrowed for a minute. “Do I what?” Stupid question, yes. Please forgive him, he doesn’t have any memories, and he was spawned from a boy who thinks babies are made from wishing on stars.

….anyway.

He got props for putting it together, at least. The man, the one from before, had insisted he couldn’t feel, but he was pretty sure that Axel was making him feel really embarrassed right now. Embarrassed and somewhat high-strung. It wasn’t something he was used to feeling, anyway, which was probably why he raised his hand to rough self-consciously through the back of his hair. This guy was just messing with him, surely. Well, he could mess back!

“I don’t know,” he said at last, and this time his smile was cheeky. Roxas didn’t smile a whole lot. But he didn’t mind doing it, if there was a good reason. This seemed like a good one. “I’ve never tried myself. I’m willing to bet not like ice cream though.” Roxas chose to set his stick on the ledge next to him, after breaking it in half.

Axel: Breaking a popsicle stick in half was sort of a downer on Axel's libido, but he only twitched slightly and his smile didn't falter at all. He planted both of his hands on the warm sandstone ledge that they were sitting on and pushed himself to a stand. "Haha," Axel said, feeling inwardly pleased that he had made Roxas look so flustered with just that two-word question. Perfect. "You ready to do something else or what?"

There was a great deal of other things they could do, after all, and it wasn't limited to walking around Twilight Town some more. Roxas was already pretty familiar with the place--it was his "home," anyway. And why did Roxas' hair look so silky? And why did his thoughts always get so random when he wanted some tail? He extended a hand for Roxas to take if he wanted the help.

Roxas: He didn’t need the help. In fact, he halfway succumbed to the instinct to brush off the offered palm and climb to his feet on his own. He was independent like that, usually annoyingly so. And the guy did kinda deserve it, what with the question and the prodding and the blushing and all.

A little shady voice inside him told Roxas that it would be far more of a tease to take the offered hand, though. He didn’t know how he knew what Axel’s staring and Axel’s smiles meant he was thinking, but he did. For some reason, Roxas just found Axel really easy to read.

He gave the man a small smirk, and placed his hand firmly against the other’s palm. “Sure. Take me.”

Ohoho. Parry, and riposte.

Axel: Axel typically was easy to read, but only what he let be read. When he wanted to clam up, and clam up tight, he was impossible to decipher and it probably drove introspective people insane with trying to figure him out. At the moment, it was very easy to see that he was interested: the perk in his smile, squirk in his eyebrow, and the half-lidded way his eyes slid over Roxas' face and down to their joined hands. He squeezed as he pulled Roxas to a standing position in front of him.

Take me? This kid was a minx and he probably didn't even know it yet. "Glad to, princess," he murmured, keeping the words strung between them like the first sudden breath after a kiss. Without warning, he yanked the kid off of the ledge and through an archway, into the small area with a spiraling staircase that led up to the actual bells of the clocktower. It was warmer in this area and dimmer.

Roxas: Now Axel was just pushing buttons on purpose. It would probably delight the man to see how the (inappropriate, Roxas felt) pet-name made his eyes narrow and his mouth press into a line. Princess? If Roxas was the princess, then Axel was a veritable /queen./ He could take this guy with his eyes closed!

And if you asked him, he’d tell you so.

Even so, the man didn’t give him much time to brood, cause suddenly they were moving through the clock tower, and the dust motes wafted and danced with the pass of their bodies, making brilliant iridescent tracks thorough the air. Not for the first time, Roxas was caught up in the /feel/ of the light reflecting off a mass, and for a minute his eyes got a little glassy and his face a little vague.

It was still unlike anything he’d yet experienced.

“This is your ‘something else?’” Roxas asked with a deliberate quirk of his brow, maybe because he knew it wasn’t at all. “You need more help than I thought.”

Axel: "What?" Axel wondered aloud, turning to look at the kid. "You want something more comfortable? I can do that. My bedroom has all sorts of pillows and pretty colors for you to look at."

Hopefully neither of them were lost to the fact that they were still holding hands--or rather than Axel wouldn't let Roxas' hand go. It was one thing to help someone to their feet and another to not relinquish one of their limbs at all. Particles of dust were rendered temporarily visible as they drifted into bands of pure sunlight that was punctuated by the stone columns rising up around them. It was a very warm, fuzzy scene that would have reminded Roxas of Destiny Islands summers if he had really remembered them. When the bell began to toll the evening hour, it was likewise fitting, although the sound was almost deafening with their proximity to the bell itself.

Roxas: Roxas ignored the comment about the bedroom. He didn't care about Axel's bedroom or his damned pillows. He got the feeling this guy didn't think he could handle a challenge. Which was an entirely childish thing to think, but Roxas was still technically a teenager, no matter what the birth certificate read. Roxas stared at their connected hand, and noticed how warm his fingers felt.

It was the first time someone had touched him like that.

Roxas smirked at him again, and waited until the thrum of the bell died away before he spoke again. "What do they give you to wear underneath the coat?" A foolish question to ask, to be sure, but he rather liked this man in spite of himself. He was dangerous, and cunning, yes, and Roxas knew very little about him. But he thought it might be nice to have someone he liked in this strange new world. Up until now, he'd been very alone.

It was hard to tell for whom the bell tolled.

Axel: "That's for me to know," Axel replied with a bit of an edge to both his smile and his voice. He didn't finish this atypical phrase with and for you to find out, but it was implied in the curve of his fingers around Roxas' and the subtle tension that had crept into his already curved spine. It was like he was waiting for something, a cue maybe, and he wasn't exactly sure what it was going to be until it happened. It was always different with every different person he encountered.

Axel tended to feel dangerous all the time--he was the Organization's bona fide assassin--but Roxas was making him feel dangerous and reckless, which said a lot. He wanted to recklessly pin this kid against the nearest hard surface and find out if he had been born nude or with clothes off, which varied from recruit to recruit, or if Xemnas had given him something else to wear besides that heavy black leather thing. Which looked hot on Roxas, don't get Axel wrong, but it left too much to the imagination for all it covered.

What were they talking about again? He forgot.

Roxas: Perhaps Xemnas had been right. Roxas was certain somehow he should be feeling hesitation right now, when he closed the distance and fixed the man with his bright blue eyes. He thought regular people might feel shame at the action that curled his fingers around Axel’s zipper and held it there, motionless and promising. He was sure he should feel a lot of things, but right now he wasn’t feeling any of them but one, and that was /want./

It was want that drove his hand, want that had tightened his fingers around the back of Axel’s palm, want that made him seek and hold the aquamarine eyes with an unfaltering gaze. And it wasn’t even want for Axel because he was attractive (which he was) or because he’d pulled the mood between them so tight it hummed with the tension (but a delicious tension, nonetheless). No, mostly, somewhere deep inside his chest, it was a want for a connection with something or someone to fill the hollow ache that told him somewhere along the line, he’d /lost/ a portion of himself he might never get back.

“So should I find out?” Blue eyes had deepened into a heavy, dark cerulean, and Roxas voice wasn’t so teasing anymore.

Axel: "I uh..." Axel breathed out and then in, all through his nose, because he was afraid of what he might do if he promised his mouth more than just the few words necessary to communicate. His tongue restlessly prowled behind his bottom teeth when it wasn't helping him to form coherent sounds. This mood was like a second skin all of the sudden, closer to him than the leather of his jacket was, and he desperately wanted to get it off, get it off. "I think that's what I meant, yeah."

The zipper was silver and heavy. He waited, wondering if this were a bluff or something special that needed to be handled as delicately as china. Was this kid far more fragile and skittish than he looked? Maybe. He had seen that this kid was a fighter, and definitely knew his heart to be one, but...

Axel blinked and realized his mouth was dryer than the desert. When had that happened?

Roxas: What had driven a man like Axel to lose his heart? Roxas did not remember the time spent in the dark before this place, but somehow it didn’t seem to be something that would haunt his dreams. For Axel, though…Roxas wondered. Everyone was afraid of something. What was this man, with his sly smiles and his smooth words and his dark occupation, really and truly afraid of?

Maybe Roxas would find that out beneath this façade of black. Roxas wanted to know, all of the sudden, wanted to know what this man kept hidden and close to him, what he guarded and clutched. It was there, somewhere, all he had to do was peel away the layers. The hand at the zipper brought it down, to expose what was beneath, and surely, surely Roxas thought /something/ was hammering through him and making his blood race.

Perhaps it was simply that heat Axel still managed to bring up across his skin.
Roxas didn't say anything, and his eyes were two gleaming stars that shone even brighter than the yellows and reds of the setting sun.

Axel: Roxas was one of the few that had retained no memory of his true self. Luckily, this wouldn't alienate him: those who did remember never talked about who they once were anyway. If he had asked Axel about it, at least up to this point, he would have been rebuffed (albeit jokingly, or with a smile, or something to lessen the apparent distrust in divulging information like that). There were some things that Nobodies just didn't talk about; their Somebodies were one of them. Maybe if Roxas toyed around with the letters A, E, and L in a mixture of alphabet soup, he'd be able to figure out Axel's true name. Saying it aloud would be a different matter.

It was doubtful that Roxas was going to find anything revealing beyond the obvious if he stripped Axel of his jacket. Fears couldn't be hidden in pockets, joints, folds of skin. Those were felt and yet not touched, if that made any sense. Unfortunately for this high tension moment between them, Axel was wearing more than just his birthday suit: his clothes were plain and thin and boring, but they were still clothes. The zipper only got halfway down his chest before he seized Roxas by the forearms and carried him forward to the nearest, convenient, and wonderfully hard surface. The stone column must have been warm on Roxas' back with the sunlight that it had been soaking up all day. Leather scraped it audibly.

"Curiouser and curiouser," Axel murmured, towering over the kid and precluding any more sunlight from reaching his already too sunny hair and too bright eyes. For one freakish moment, he felt like he could have eaten this kid on the spot--he looked that delicious and smelled that strongly of boyishly enthusiastic hormones.

Roxas: Roxas seemed not to register the thud that was his back against a stone wall, however warm or cool it was. His hands had gripped both flaps of Axel’s now partially open jacket when he’d been hoisted from the ground, and the redhead would feel their weight around the back of his neck, bringing him forward and down. He was not given the reprieve he sought; Roxas’ eyes still gleamed, even in the shadow of Axel’s own body, and they never left his face. Maybe it was more than a literal unbinding, because they were certainly piercing, those eyes. Even in a place completely devoid of light, it wouldn’t be a far stretch to believe they’d still be able to see…

…right down to your core.

It was true. The clothes were boring. But it wasn’t about the clothes anymore, if it even ever had been. The want was clawing now, all razors and nails up the inner walls of his chest, over and through his throat, and out between his lips in one swift exhalation of air as Axel pressed him there. “Shut up,” came next, the only two words he uttered before that grip on Axel’s collar would be redoubled enough to bring him down into a swift, ravenous kiss. Axel talked too damn much.

Axel: Yeah, Axel thought wickedly, this is what was missing.

His eyes stayed open for a few seconds, since he was genuinely curious to see if Roxas kept his eyes open or closed when he kissed somebody. Since Roxas had no memories whatsoever, all of this was happening based on pure instinct and that was purely hot to Axel--hotter than the lithe body beneath his or the heat from the stone that bled through it. There was still a curve to Axel's lips, a smug smile, and this translated into their kiss in the unapologetic nibbling he gave the kid's lower pouty lip.

Regardless of what Roxas did, Axel closed his eyes when he kissed someone. Even when he was going to stab them in the back, he closed his eyes and shifted closer as he did now, forcing out all of the dead zone that kept heat from heat. Since he had to bend awkwardly just to complete this kiss, he was free to slide his longer thigh and knee over the kid's legs to try to find purchase in all that dense black.

It would have been so easy to dump them both into a portal and send them careening onto his bed, but for the moment it was too warm and stifling to go anywhere. The air was kind of sticky with humid heat and he liked it--liked Roxas being so desperately uncomfortable as to kiss him like this. He barely knew about what was really going on behind this kiss, about Roxas' want for something to fill the void, but Axel could have guessed. Roxas was just as easy to read when his body was drumming like that.

Roxas: Axel may or may not be disappointed -- Roxas closed his eyes, but not all the way, and it was a three-fourths hooded look that kept the barest slivers of blue visible, as though if he were ever to fully close his eyes, that light would go out. Course, that was a silly thing to think -- it was far more likely Roxas was simply too lazy to close his eyes all the way, or maybe that he was too distracted to remember to keep them shut. It certainly seemed like he was distracted, what with the kiss he gave.

Let's talk a little about the kiss.

Axel'd not been far off when he'd noticed that the actions were being driven purely by instinct. This was the first kiss this body had experienced, and it had not the memories to compare it to any other. But what it lacked in expertise it made up for with pure, raw energy. Heart or no, hormones were still in existence, and though there were moments when it was faintly clumsy, it was also reckless and open and hungry and inquisitive. Roxas taught himself by doing, and what he was doing currently was tasting the other man, prodding him insistently, ravaging his mouth like a dying man would drink from a well. The want compelled him to take, to clutch, to bring close and hold, and whatever Axel gave Roxas took and then some.

Ah, youthful enthusiasm. It was likely more than Axel bargained for, what with all the time he’d spent around the old coots. Then again, maybe not. If he wasn’t careful, Roxas would zip by him twice before he’d even managed to register what happened. As it stood the boy was fast, and already he was slipping his fingers in around that thin fabric with a questing determination. It was hot and the air was heavy and it made his head float. The frustration of the barriers between body and touch was palpable – this close, there was no way to pull the zipper down anymore, and Roxas pushed at Axel’s body in all ways possible in an effort to bleed free of his clothes.

Axel: Axel would have said something snarky then, something like Easy, tiger or maybe Woah there, but his mouth was too caught up in some of that youth, hormonal enthusiasm. His tongue was certainly in no position to be forming any words beyond the soundless, meaningless ones that got hashed out against Roxas'. He took a breath somewhere in there, which brought a shock of cold (compared to this kiss) and fresh air into the equation; it felt really, really good.

"... heh." The laugh was more like a soft hiccup, an afterthought of his throat, because the frantic movement of Roxas' hands weren't lost on him. He reached up between them, hands snaking across leather and silver teeth, looking for the paws that would sooner rip leather off than calmly unzip and remove. Luckily for Axel, Roxas hadn't gotten frantic enough to summon a keyblade and literally saw the clothes away. He gently did all of the hard work for Roxas, prodding him when he needed to shrug his shoulders this way or that, wiggle his arm, and that sort of thing, as Axel also freed himself of the shackles of uniform in favor of his drab attire. The real question was, and he didn't look so much as he touched: what was Roxas beneath his jacket?

Roxas: Roxas had clothes on, fortunately or unfortunately enough, depending on how you looked at it. His pants, like everyone else's, were black -- the clothes he'd worn before had been taken from him and he hadn't seen them since gaining the coat. The shirt was supposed to be black too, but somewhere he'd managed to keep hold or find or scrounge up something very much not black. They'd taken away his precious jacket. It was the very slightest way he could thumb his nose at the Man.

Needless to say, the shirt was white. Roxas didn't spare it a second thought, though, not as Axel guided the coat from both their shoulders like that. The kiss was ended with the laugh on Axel's part, and for the first time in quite a while (fourty-five seconds to a minute, tops) Roxas was once again given a bird's eye view of that fascinating face.

His hands were the first things he moved, and he molded them over Axel's features like a sculptor would a piece of clay. It was as though Roxas was memorizing the lines of his features, investigating and familiarizing himself with all the nooks and hollows of his neck and shoulders. He pressed and he careessed with a hand that knew no difference when it tread across a sensitive area -- if Axel didn't make any sign of approval, Roxas would continue on without stopping. If, however, eyelids did droop or faint murmurs were heard, he would pass over that hollow again, this time with a grin. If the reaction was particularly nice, he even latched onto the area with his mouth, which was the case with the circular patch of neck just between jugular and clavicle. Then there was no escaping the volley of lips and tongue and teeth.

Like a baby takes steps into a new world, so Roxas was exploring this new experience of touch. How could anyone forget this?

Axel: Axel was, needless to say, a very willing guinea pig when it came to teaching Roxas all about the wonders of sensation. There was a new texture to be discovered every inch of the way: slick leather, harsh cotton, warm skin, that special little place just behind Axel's ears with lots of soft hair that made Axel create this indescribable noise and push himself into Roxas, hard and then harder. It was a good thing they typically wore their hoods up during guild powwows, because Axel doubted he was going to be able to hide the marks that Roxas was leaving on him.

Who was claiming who, exactly? Despite all of Axel's bravado and comings-on, Roxas was certainly playing him like a finely tuned instrument right now. Maybe it was the paradox that was Axel: look one way, act another. But nothing really needed to make sense when they lived in a universe with scourges of darkness, fairy tale princesses, and kids wielding giant keys to combat evil. He pawed at the paradox that was Roxas' white shirt in all this black, looking for buttons or seams to fumble with or tear at. He wanted more than just this fashion statement of a rebellion; he needed damp flesh and husky sounds, kind of like the ones he was making but coming from the throat of this ANgel instead.

Roxas: Roxas was sure this man would swallow him up. He pushed his body forward like that and now that the coats were off, Roxas could FEEL it, feel the heat smothering him from chest to hip to pelvis, and Roxas could not help but press back, because pressure was nice, pressure was /good/, pressure was the cause of the series of high-vibration murmurs Axel then received into the flesh of the skin behind his ear. There was no hope of hiding anything now – Axel would know exactly what he was doing to the boy by the way his body writhed and scrambled for purchase. Axel would very likely have to rip off that precious shirt, because Roxas was a leech that had attached itself to his body and would not let go. He almost seemed to suffer to distraction, his hands moved so swiftly over Axel’s body, like they wanted to be everywhere at once, like they didn’t want to miss anything. They were already slithering up underneath Axel’s shirt, hiking it upward, and when it was high enough Roxas would unceremoniously pull away from that flesh with a wet ‘pop’ only to bury his face in a new target – Axel’s chest.

And when he found the tight round bud of a nipple, he would likely not resurface for another good five minutes.

Roxas was finding he /loved/ to touch and be touched. Axel pulled off his shirt, whether whole or in pieces, and he would find a willing body there beneath it. It was easy, to hide behind the walls of words, but touch…it could tell you everything! Roxas came to the alter of Axel’s body as a blind man, and he worshiped there and was made to see, and as he did he was sure he’d never find anything so beautiful. He could believe it was beautiful, couldn’t he? This new experience? Axel was beautiful, and Roxas almost felt like that empty space WAS being filled somehow, because right now Axel was all alone and all his.

Mine. He was never getting away.

Axel: Roxas was a quick learner, Axel realized too late to save himself. One of the things Roxas probably noticed was that Axel's skin was strangely dry, which came from long overexposure to his own Twilight-fueled abilities, and the first droplet of sweat was like a crescendo of flavor on skin that was otherwise too bland. Axel's knees bent awkwardly as he kept himself upright, leaning on Roxas--and therefore smothering him even more--and the stone column behind him. The hand braced on the stone went numb with pins and needles. His other hand, ever more illustrious and cunning, pulled at a ripped piece of Roxas' shirt, spazzed and clenched like claws around a prey of broken cotton, and then trailed down, down, all the way down.

"Yeah." What was Axel referring to? Probably everything all at once. His voice was as dark as the cramped space between them and he licked absently at the moisture at the corner of his lips in between huffing breaths. It was easy to fill the voice with physical intimacy, sure, and Axel was already wondering how Roxas was going to react when it was over. If you were weak-willed, the need consumed you and burned you away little by little. For someone who had no memories, was this experience going to be delicious traumatizing?

Axel didn't really have the heart to care about the ethics of fucking a little kid. He just cared about trying to rid Roxas of the rest of his clothes, one-handed and shaking all over, because Roxas was hot and Axel liked hot things. This wasn't about the beauty or something cheesy like that, at least to him, but he could pretend it was if Roxas wanted it that way. He was a great pretender.

For being an amnesiac, Roxas certainly knew what to do with his mouth to make Axel cringe with pleasure.

Roxas: Roxas didn’t know at all. He only knew what Axel reacted to, which was why he was trying everything. When Axel did, react, though, Roxas seized on it with a single-mindedness to make a bloodhound proud. He liked it when Axel made those noises, you know why? Because they were noises Axel made from something HE did.

And that gave him a sense of selfish pride. Of course, in his youth and inexperience he thought there was no one who could make Axel sound –quite- like that. No one but him. Perhaps it was true, and perhaps it wasn’t. One thing was for sure – once a dam is broken, the water doesn’t stop flowing for quite some time. Hormones were the same way, and Roxas was far, far too insistent for his own good. Likely Axel would come to regret encouraging this before their time was over.

Or would he?

It was stifling. Roxas could barely breathe. That was the only reason he pulled away, to delve beneath an arm for a deep breath of gloriously cool air. Axel’s shirt was half off and Roxas had been berefted of his, and now the boy stood with glimmering, intense eyes as he stared up at the redhead. He would not admit nervousness, if he had any, because he foolishly assumed he could take whatever was dished out. If he incited it first, there could be no accusations of hesitation or fear.

Which was why Axel’s belt was the first to go, followed not too long after by his pants. Roxas felt that somehow, clothes were not allowed in moments like this. Not that he really knew what would come next. As far as he was concerned, he’d keep touching till he got somewhere interesting.

Axel: Roxas was able to snake Axel's thin belt away and get those heavy black jeans halfway down the guy's thighs before Axel slipped two fingers under Roxas' chin. With just that leverage, he tilted Roxas' head back and brought him in for another kiss already on the edge of suffocating breathlessness when it began. Cool, fresh air was overrated to Axel, who wanted to breathe exhaust and succumb to the damp fire that was twisting into being between them. He didn't even bother trying to take Roxas' pants off, right now anyway, because that took too much time; he just wormed his hand in and grabbed the kid's ass, discovering immediately if he had underwear like Axel did or had decided to free-ball it. (Thankfully, Axel didn't let himself wonder if Xemnas now included a tidy pair of underwear with every Organization cloak. That'd be creepy enough to ruin the mood.)

Things like regret were lost on Axel, who didn't have a heart or even the pretending necessary to feel emotions that abstract. What happened, happened. If this kid could instill regret in him, the presses would have to stop. The only real concern was Xemnas finding out about him molesting the newest, arguably most powerful and most impressionable member of the Organization on top of a clocktower at dusk.

But Roxas kind of tasted like sea salt ice cream, so Axel, again, didn't particularly care. He sucked at Roxas' tongue to glean the last of the flavor from where it had been absorbed into tastebuds and slick, hot crevices elsewhere.

Roxas: He would die if he stayed down here, he was sure of it. Axel might like hot, but Roxas needed to breathe, and Axel was making it incredibly difficult to do so. He hiccupped once against the kiss, perhaps in reaction to that hand down his pants (do you really want to know what kind of underwear he has on? No? We didn’t think so. Imagine lacy thongs to your hearts content if you must) before sliding his arms again around too-thin shoulders. Using that leverage he was able to hoist himself high enough to almost-climb up Axel’s body and wrap his legs around the man’s waist. This provided two advantages. 1.) He was now no longer cornered in a dark space beneath a much-larger mass and 2.) it gave him the pleasant sensation of always having a presence between his legs. This last discovery was an intense distraction at first which culminated into a frenzied few moments of movement as he tried to /not/ succumb to the impulse to ride Axel’s torso and did a somewhat bad job of it.

Poor kid. He was so far gone now Axel could’ve done whatever he wanted to him.

Axel: Roxas certainly didn't help himself by making his skin even more available to Axel's ministrations. Although one hand was still shoved down the kid's pants, roaming over this underwear that was left up to his sordid imagination, he had his other hand cupping the curve where shoulder met neck. He squeezed and dutifully let Roxas breathe, though he would have preferred to take Roxas right up against the edge of hot unconsciousness and flirt with it. There was a fetish here--asphyxiation. What had Roxas gotten himself into?

"Easy," Axel murmured, opening his eyes only halfway. Was he calling Roxas easy or trying to calm him down? Probably both. It was a good thing Axel had gotten to him before anyone else had--knowing the call of this kid's absent heart, he was going to be startingly loyal to whoever made out with him first. Axel considered himself lucky to be this kid's righteous guardian, albeit one that wanted to make him cry and scream with pleasure. "You wanna... go back to my place?"

Because as romantic as copulating on a clock tower at dusk was, Axel would rather scrape his shoulder blades on carpet than on rough stone. He probably wasn't going to take no as an answer, either, considering the world was already melting around them in purple-black nothingness that would devour, transport, and deliver them into some one-room place in The World That Never was that functioned as a home at the best of times.

Roxas: The sudden influx of free oxygen made him giddy and lightheaded. As such, he didn’t even register Axel’s question until they’d already left and arrived at another place much farther away and far less “substantial,” if one wanted to get technical. After all, what substantiality did a place that never existed have in relation to a town on the edge of twilight?

Roxas spared two seconds to glance around the room and two more seconds to promptly forget whatever it was he saw. Even here it was hot, or maybe that was just Axel being so close, because Axel was very hot, Roxas had noticed. He leaned down to latch his teeth in silent rebuke into that spot beneath Axel’s ear, that spot he knew made him shudder and gasp. That was for the “Easy,” whatever it may have meant.

Roxas didn’t particularly feel like calming down. He liked this giddy feeling, he liked the way Axel made him feel wild and reckless. There was a freedom in that, like there was a freedom in fighting. This dance was sort of like that one. Axel was a good partner.

"You ask stupid questions."

Axel: Axel was definitely going to be easy whenever Roxas exploited that weakness beneath his ear. Hopefully this kid wasn't as nefarious as Axel could be, because he could make a real mess of things if he ever agitated that spot while they were in public. The cold, unyielding assassin of the Organization couldn't let himself been seen as a blubbering pile of overexcited flesh, now could he? He tried to say something to Roxas about calling his perfectly logical questions stupid, but his tongue got tangled with his teeth and wouldn't work out the right syllables. He moaned in his throat.

The portal had deposited them in the apartment on Axel's bed, natch, but it was not a typical bed. His mattress didn't have a frame, so it was low to the floor; Axel's back was up against the sheer volume of pillows he had stocked the thing with and Roxas was the one straddling him now. He licked his lips and looked past the ruffles of blonde hair in front of him to a mirror he had installed on the opposing wall. Oh, yeah. Roxas looked good on top of him. Roxas was a little scrawny, but he was unmistakably strong. It was kind of shocking to Axel when he saw how needy he looked, all puffy red lips, glowing eyes, wet skin, and mussed hair. His hips lifted against the weight on top of him.

"Off, off... --get these off," he growled, removing his hands from Roxas' offensive pants. Pants were stupid, Axel decided viciously. No one should have to wear pants. They had cloaks, so it wasn't like it'd be indecent in public, right? Pants were dumb.

Roxas: And where had Axel’s pants gone, one wondered? Were they still pooled in a silly little bundle around his knees and ankles? If so, he should kick them off, because Roxas was already making himself quite at home atop Axel’s body, making the man spread his legs out a little bit with the downward weight he was applying to his pelvis. If Axel wanted Roxas’ pants off, he should stop grinding into him like that, because it only made blue eyes roll back into his head and words turn into a distant, pleasant sort of buzz. Roxas himself was pondering the pleasurable effects that different applications of pressure brought to the heavy throbbing between his legs when he became aware of Axel’s hands groping at his pants.

He still had pants on? What? OH. Right. He hated pants too, he’d never wear them again. Though that might cause a bit of a problem, considering how high up Axel always kept his bottom zipper. Then again, it made it easy to slide hands under….

Focus, Roxas. Pants. Two sets of hands fumbling at one zipper didn’t really make for any faster progress, but eventually they did get them off. Roxas even allowed Axel the added bonus of taking his boxers (thong?) with them. The man now had one very naked boy straddling his body, a boy who was already pulling at the elastic of his underwear as though to reveal what lie (stood at attention) in wait beneath.

WHAT to do.

Axel: Axel had to suppress the urge to smell Roxas' underwear, which sounded incredibly gross and yet would have been impossibly erotic if Roxas had been excited enough to stain his scary, lacy thong. The thong fell through Axel's fingers when plain cotton scraped his own erection and made him hiss with pain; needless to say, he was very sensitive right now, and Roxas was pretty reckless when he wanted something as badly as he did. Again, Axel was thankful a keyblade hadn't come into the equation. That might have been kinky, but the bodily injury resulting from it would be something else.

His own pants had cleverly gotten themselves lost at some point--probably into a proxy portal that had spawned when they were traveling here in the first place. Or maybe he had just kicked them off from around his ankles and they were at the end of his bed. Either way, the only piece of clothing still left on him was his shirt, which had been crumpled up pretty badly and yet had not gotten torn off yet.

This must have been some sort of record for Axel. Just how often did he bed a cute blonde boy within hours of meeting one? It must have been his new cologne, which smelled like musk and something flowery. Definitely the cologne. He sighed and tilted his head back, getting comfortable.

"You wanna touch it, baby?" Axel asked. His low bedroom voice actually turned this potentially hilarious question into a sexy one. At the very least, he hadn't given his genitals their own name. Hopefully.

Roxas: Dude. What the hell had he just said about stupid questions, and Axel was STILL asking them? He seemed like a kinky type of guy; Roxas considered asking him if he had any duct tape…

He probably did.

So would this be a bad point to say that Roxas had yet to masturbate himself? He hadn’t really been up for all that long, you know. He didn’t have chance! Luckily enough, there was still that good old natural instinct floating around inside his head that told him this was a pretty damned erogenous zone. And Axel seemed erect enough for Roxas, who shamelessly passed a finger across the head of his cock and over the slit. He was approaching this just like he’d approached the other earlier – touch, and see what brought the most response, and then latch onto it like sucking made it bleed liquid life. And maybe, this time, it actually would.

He was taking this a little slower than the first, though. Who knows why that was. Maybe he was intimidated by the fact that he was touching the culmination of all their efforts. Maybe he was embarrassed. Or maybe he just wanted to drive Axel genuinely mad.

Who knows.

Axel: Axel decided then and there: Roxas was a god damn, motherfucking tease. There was no wiggle room to deny this, to make excuses about embarrassment and intimidation--he was convinced this kid knew what he was doing, even if all of his ministrations were cautious and slow right now. A cock was a cock and sex was sex, and Roxas made Axel whimper, which was completely unacceptable. Earlier, the kid had been taking the bull by the horns, so to speak, and Axel had honestly been expecting no different here. The muscles in his legs locked as his toes flexed, scraping the soft blankets beneath them.

Where had this demon of mercy come from, really? Sora, yeah, Sora the Keyblade Master, but he sorely doubted Sora the Keyblade Master had ever seen anything phallic beyond his own Kingdom Key. He dug his heels in and barked out half of a throat-muffled laugh. His hands roamed over Roxas shoulders, up into his hair, where he swept through that choppy blonde stuff without stopping to grasp at any of it. He might have ripped it out if he weren't careful. Maybe Roxas was kinky enough to like that kind of pain--Axel certainly was. His legs were going numb with Roxas sitting on them like that and it felt great.

Roxas: It’s hard to look innocent when you’re grinning like Roxas was. He was trying to hide it, but the smile still pulled at the corners of his lips anyway. It was a smug, pleased smirk, making it pretty obvious that a.) Roxas was happy with himself for the power he could exact and hold over this man and b.) he really did have some idea what he was doing.

He halfway wished Axel would grab his hair. He had this fleeting image of the man seizing him by the head and pressing his face down onto his cock. It was brief and intense and it made Roxas shudder – if he’d still had those underwear on and he hadn’t stained them before, he certainly would have now. He wondered what Axel tasted like.

He decided he’d find out. And if all that practice from earlier wasn’t a promise, then Axel hadn’t been paying attention. Surely he had, though, the way Roxas had licked and sucked that long blue, bitingly cold ice cream. His eyes probably hadn’t left Roxas’ mouth the entire time.

A hot pink tongue slipped free to take a sumptuous lick from base to tip, just like Axel was that remembered ice cream., and his dripping was getting on Roxas' hands.

Axel: If Axel weren't clutching Roxas' hair before, he certainly was now. His fingers stretched through the blonde scruff and then locked there, trying to resist the urge to guide Roxas' mouth over to where it would feel best or to get him started on the real cock-sucking with the perfect, maddening pace that Axel needed right now. It was no secret that Axel had been saying some silent something by offering Roxas a popsicle like that and then watching him with burning want as he devoured it from start to finish. He tortured himself like that sometimes. Roxas was too perfect not to have homoerotic fantasies on top of a clocktower about.

Unfortunately, Axel wasn't done saying stupid things, but the questions were thankfully absent. At best he could muster some disjointed words, sentences that got scrambled on the way from his brain to his mouth. He tasted like the rest of him did: warm, vagulely nutty, kind of salty, real. Realness didn't have a flavor, the same as water, but it was definitely a component in Roxas' mouth. Even with Roxas' weight atop him, Axel forced his hips up an inch from the bed as he braced himself on his shoulders and writhed uncontrollably.

Xemnas was going to be pissed if he found out the newest recruit had lost his mouth-virginity this fast, but maybe he shouldn't have given Roxas such a pretty and exotic thong.

Roxas: Why did Xemnas dress them all, was the real question. Were they all just dolls to him? They were definitely soldiers, but there was no telling what went on in that man's head. He definitely had some issues, and it was probably a good thing Axel had gotten to Roxas first. The man had been correct when he said the boy was a bit impressionable. There was no telling what might have happened if Number One had been the person to push himself on the teen, and not Axel.

Then again, Roxas HAD pushed back. So he'd obviously wanted the man on some level. Axel insisted he wasn't waxing poetic about something that was purely for fun and attraction, yet he was the one using sappy words like 'angel.' Perhaps it wasn't too far fetched to say there was something that just resonated in the space between them.

Currently, Roxas was resonating noise against the mass in his mouth. At first it had been an automatic shuddering moan in response to Axel's hands in his hair. It gave him goosebumps. Now, however, he was purring to see if the vibrations against the shaft would have any effect on the writhing going on beneath his body. Roxas liked it when Axel writhed. It made him like a particularly flexible strain of music. One Roxas was currently playing out with his fingers. Axel didn't taste like ice cream. But it wasn't bad.

Beware. The kid's a biter.

Axel: When Roxas did that, Axel no longer had the space in his brain to think about Xemnas, or the Organization, or even how uncomfortable it was to twist his back and hips the way he was. The rush of blood to his brain on the way to his cock made him light-headed and dizzy, and halfway afraid he was going to suffer a seizure or worse, since he was seeing black without his eyes being closed. Luckily for him, he didn't pass out and miss what was going on: he steeled himself, hands in Roxas' hair and heels in his bed, and went rigid with the pure shockwave of it. How could such small hums cause such devastating explosions? It was
Axel (5:05:11 PM): chaos theory in the wild.

Axel had since amended his notion that Roxas was an angel--he was a demon, a filthy incubus born from the fires of hell and sent to seduce him with less effort than it had taken anyone before him. As much as Axel secretly liked being the one played, he usually was on top, the one bearing down and pushing buttons, limits, everything.

Roxas: Apparently Axel'd been suffering from his hard-on for far longer than Roxas thought, if he'd given Roxas that popsicle with the intent to torture himself. Allow him to help you with that, Axel.

Well, at least if he was an incubus, he was an incubus who was currently attached to the most coveted and sensitive part of Axel's body. Roxas pulled away a bit to incline his head and place some pulling kisses in the hollows of Axel's thighs, followed by some pinching nips of skin in the spot he'd immediately kissed. These continued along till they reached the base of Axel's cock, at which point those teeth were recklessly raked along the length of him.

Roxas was finding it hard not to touch himself. As it stood, he was currently wriggling his body around in an effort to find some sort of purchase against the mattress or a leg or SOMETHING. He had not the expertise to ignore himself for someone else, and the throbbing erection was getting really distracting.

Axel: "Fff..." Fuck was right there on the tip of his tongue, concealed between his lip and upper row of teeth, and that was exactly what he wanted. As nice as it would have been to let Roxas jerk him off with his mouth, he wanted to see some of this screaming reciprocation before he came from the insanity of it. His thighs were unusually pale, which made the bite marks stand out like warning signals; his cock was already hard and blushing, but it only seemed to darken and get worse with Roxas' reckless raking. The veins were very prominent all of the sudden. "Gh..."

Fuck words. Hopefully Roxas did have a thing for a little pain, because Axel wrenched him upward by hair and shoulder, away from the weeping cock that cried for him. Without even missing a beat, Axel took him by the mouth and plundered it for a taste of himself. He felt Roxas' wanting cock slide over him with its own lubricant and almost went crazy right then and there.

They couldn't communicate psychically, of course, because that was madness. But Axel could always try. I'm going to fuck you, he thought in Roxas' general direction. As much as he considered just doing it extremely hot, he was painfully aware that Roxas was a virgin--probably a tight one, at that. Axel fumbled over the edge of his bed for something, looking through the mess his clothes had made next to them. He wanted Roxas slick, wanting, and ready to sit down on him in a way he hadn't yet.

Roxas: The gasp as Axel pulled him upward and away from his prize was audible. It did hurt, but the pain was both somehow deadened and heightened by the friction of his erection up the length of Axel's body. It made the entirety of him /pulse/, and he couldn't help a twitch, even while his little moan was swallowed up by Axel's mouth and tongue diving into the depths of his throat.

He was still straddling Axel's chest, and he didn't make any effort to hide the fact that he was now obviously pleasuring himself by grinding against Axel's torso. The rhythm was somewhat erratic and strange, but only because he couldn't decide which felt better - rubbing against that hot skin at a feverish pace, or a slow, agonizing one. It was now terribly, painfully obvious that all thought of restraint or teasing had completely flown from his head, and Roxas was simply the sweetest little virgin that had ever been tempted and turned into a delicious wanting sex fiend.

Yes, was the thought-response, and he didn't care if it was demeaning, or if Axel was shifting the balance of power. He wanted it, he wanted it, he wanted it.

Please.

Axel : Axel was experienced and it showed, because he had all of the tools and tricks of the trade ready for his disposal. The tube of lubricant was an innocent-looking, gray, blank thing, tabula rasa and all that, and it curiously reminded him of the writhing blonde nymph on top of him. His hands were shaking badly than he ever remembered as he popped the cap and tried to coat his fingers in the stuff without getting it all over himself, Roxas, or his bed. He let Roxas grind mindlessly until he was ready; when Roxas had pushed upward a little, Axel grabbed his butt and didn't even bother to warn him before one slick finger smoothed down the crack of his ass and entered him.

Would tomorrow be awkward? Could Nobodies even feel awkward about having sex? Axel hoped that he was a sex god in Roxas' eyes, someone never to be turned away and denied, because he would have liked to do this as often as Roxas were willing. The poor kid was probably going to be sore later, even with preparation like this, just because it was his first time and Axel wasn't the gentlest person ever. If Roxas at all looked uncomfortable by fingers pressing and testing inside him, Axel licked at his lips to get his attention and kissed him with the sweetness of a first.

akingofoblivion @ 2007-03-15T01:51:00

2007-03-15T06:53:54Z

50_rps theme set started with a_young_hero: Soulmates

50_rps theme set started with traitorousflame: The Next Life

ACTIVE

2007-01-11T02:11:12Z

Title: Colors of Light, Pt 2
Characters: Roxas/Sora/Riku
Type: Plot/Yaoi
Rating: NC-17

The address Riku gave was one Roxas vaguely knew to be across town. He didn’t spend much time in the area – in fact, if it wasn’t the school, Sora’s house, or the island, he didn’t often venture far from his home. Like a territorial animal he had a space he prowled, his paths crisscrossing and interconnecting like an invisible web only he could see. Riku, as always, was making him break his circle yet again.

There was no window to climb in, or if there was, Roxas was not yet familiar with it. He looked at the number one last time to make sure it was correct before climbing the steps to the door. Sora was asleep, and he had no idea what the interior of these apartments looked like; his knock was therefore barely a whisper against the wood of the door. He didn’t want to wake anyone up.

There was always a mixture of anticipation and anxiety that settled down deep in the pit of his stomach whenever he choose to make these outings. A conundrum, a gut-twisting Why am I here? mixed with a flutter that didn’t need words because it was answer enough, in itself.

Roxas adjusted his backpack, and waited.

For You

2007-01-10T08:05:21Z

Listen to the song

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

Anger and agony
Are better than misery
Trust me I've got a plan
When the lights go up you will understand

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing
Rather feel pain

I know
That you're wounded
You know
That I'm here to save you
You know
I'm always here for you
I know
That you'll thank me later

Pain, without love
Pain, can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Rather feel pain than nothing at all
Rather feel pain

Mood music

2007-01-02T22:40:57Z

Hear the song.

Come on
Fear of the dark, tears me apart
Won´t leave me alone and time keeps running out
Just one more life, I'm so sick and tired
Of singing the blues, I should turn my life around
Come on

Tell me why do I feel this way
All my life I`ve been standing on the borderline
Too many bridges burned
Too many lies I´ve heard
Had a life but I can´t go back
Can´t do that, it will never be the same again
And I know I don´t
Have any time to burn
Come on

They follow me home, disturbing my sleep
But I´ll find a place, A place where they cannot find me
Maybe I´m lost, and maybe I´m scared
But too many times I´ve closed the doors behind me

Tell me why do I feel this way
All my life I`ve been standing on the borderline
Too many bridges burned
Too many lies I´ve heard
Had a life but I can´t go back
Can´t do that, it will never be the same again
And I know I don´t
Have any time to burn

Leave it all behind,
Cross the borderline,
Face the truth, don´t have any time to
Have any time to burn

Tell me why do I feel this way
All my life I`ve been standing on the borderline
Too many bridges burned
Too many lies I´ve heard
Had a life but I can´t go back
Can´t do that, it will never be the same again
Gotta go, cause I know I don´t,
Have any time to burn

ACTIVE

2006-12-05T04:23:18Z

Title: Waking Dreams (Closed)
Characters: Kairi and Roxas
Time: Post KH2
Type: Plot-driven characterization (Angst/Romance)
Rating G to NC-17

Summary: When Kairi begins to see a blonde boy no one else can, it startles her. When he starts talking to her, she starts to wonder if she’s going crazy. Are these memories and dreams from a past she was never a part of? Or is there a part of her heart that’s still reaching out for something only she can find?

Most of the time, when she saw him it was only for a second. A flash, ones she questioned the reality of – he would be sitting on a park bench, or passing her on a busy crowded street. Once, she swore he was sitting next to her on the bus, but when she turned back to look again, the seat was empty. It always happened that way. Every time she turned to look for him, he was gone.

He was always smiling at her.

She’d dream about him too, sometimes. And though everything else in the dream was tepid and faded like an old, cracked photograph, he was constantly so real it was shocking. Like she could wake up and he’d still be there, standing right beside her. Looking at her through that shock of light blonde hair, watching her with that laughing grin.

And yet, his eyes were so very sad.

Destiny Islands’ sunsets were something of a tourist attraction, for those tourists who managed to make their way out to such a quiet and peaceful island paradise. Still, even with the locals, they were something of a treasured thing – even though most islanders were used to them by now, you could still catch people on their porches and out on the beach, viewing the spectacular golds and reds as the great orb slowly made its way down over the edge of the ocean. Watching the sunsets was something of a tradition, an opportunity to stop and take the time out of a busy day to realize the world really was a strange and beautiful place, worthy of awe and admiration.

The sun was setting now, and the lights were just as breathtaking as ever, though for some reason today there thin threads of purple and deep, faint green spread throughout the vista, as though someone had taken fingers full of paint and drug them through the picture. Storm clouds tended to look like that occasionally, though these were odd storm clouds indeed – thin and wispy, like smoke. Perhaps it was simply a trick of the light. Light DOES tend to do strange things sometimes, after all.

Strange things, indeed.

INACTIVE

2006-11-19T00:17:30Z

Title: Colors of Light
Characters: Roxas/Riku
Type: Yaoi
Rating: NC-17

Light is everywhere. Even in the pitch black, there is the potential to generate radiance and warmth. From the faintest glow of the stars, high above, to the brilliance residing in one human heart, the world exists on light. Without it, life is nothing. Without it, all would die.

Roxas, perhaps, was not quite so poetic about the element he was born into as that. Throughout his life he’d existed in darkness, but even in that his essence had been so much more. More than once, he’d taken solace in the realization that he was not simply a shadow, as they said. How could a shadow ever generate light as he did? It had been something of a validation for him, and back then, he’d gripped tight every example of such proof he could come up with. How could he not? He’d been starving.

Now that he was here, light had not stopped being a comfort for him. An old and dear friend, he had not turned his back upon it once finding Sora, but embraced it. That his light now had a personality, a taste and a smell, was simply a further proof he'd made the right decision. It was still the same element, still unique and part of him. And it still sang to him just as sweetly as it had all that time ago, only now the voice had a name.

Its name was Sora.

Riku wanted, more than anything, to be a part of that light. To taste and to touch and to feel the essence of the boy he’d loved for so long. Roxas understood his loneliness, though his sympathy was often mistaken for pity. It wasn’t, though. Roxas had no pity for Riku, just as he had no pity for himself; what was done was done, and you lived with the consequences. Riku could beat himself up over things as he liked, but his last words had left Roxas feeling the sting of the intended slap. I never needed you.

Needed. Needed. Did he even know what that word meant?

It was late. Far, far too late to be awake. The moon was high and full, casting all things in a silvery whiteness, making the dull come alive with a metallic sheen. The gentle wind rustling the curtains in Riku’s attic loft was neither warm nor cool, but just the right temperature. Comfortable. Pleasant. Like a hand, it parted the gauzy film and caused the fabric to ripple with its weight, almost like a person pulling aside a barrier to enter in. The breeze crouched upon the windowsill for a moment, whispering to itself. It watched the boy upon the bed with eyes the color of watery moonlight.

When it stepped forward into the room, it was little more than an outline of a thing. Undulating and ever-moving, like the curtain, it seemed as though forms caught in its shape and solidified, a soft and yellow fire licking up an invisible page. When the foot touched the ground, it was no longer an outline of a foot, but a cloudy apparition of one, glowing softly in the darkness. The flame licked upward. First calves, then stomach. Blooming outward across the shoulders, the illumination spread as wings unfurling. The figure was faceless, though the hair atop its head seemed ever-shifting in its radiance, and the eyes which peered from within its expressionless features were bright and real, filled with an unmistakably recognizable life.

The figure sang, though the song went unheard. And as it approached the bed with each step its boundaries became more solid, more familiar, though it never seemed to define itself enough to take on a definite likeness. It was merely an echo of a someone, a tablet by which to read…whatever one wanted to read. And when it finally knelt beside the bed and the prone form therein, its eyes were bright and keen with knowing.

And the lips upon the ear? Tangible.

Until there was a move made to look upon the intruder. And then all there will be is the gentle flapping of the curtain beneath the bright light of the moon, still perched upon the windowsill.

Mood music.

2006-11-17T04:57:45Z

Yeah, I know it's a girly song. Shut up, I don't care.

- R

Download Here With Me
by Dido

I didn't hear you leave
I wonder how am I still here
I don't wanna move a thing
it might change my memory
Oh I am what I am
I'll do what I want
but I can't hide

And I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
until you're resting here with me
And I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
until you're resting here with me

I don't wanna call my friends
they might wake me from this dream
I can't leave this place
and risk forgetting all that's been
Oh I am what I am
I'll do what I want
but I can't hide

I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
until you're resting here with me
And I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
until you're resting here
And I won't go
I won't sleep
I can't breathe
until you're resting here with me
And I won't leave
I can't hide
I cannot be
until you're resting here with me

Active

2006-11-15T06:27:08Z

Title: Further down the rabbit hole
Characters: Roxas and Sora
Type: Yow-ee
Time: Canon, Post KH2
Rating: NC-17

Roxas almost….almost didn’t even spare the time to grab clothes. His mind was already distracted enough with thinking ahead to all they were going to do tonight, he barely had the presence of mind to consider things like clean underwear. Really, in the wake of the thought of Sora’s hands and Sora’s eyes and Sora’s lips, who could really blame him? Roxas was male, and once his mind began to travel down certain avenues there wasn’t much turning back.

At the last minute, he did recall, however, that if he didn’t want to put on the same dirty clothes after he showered…or if he wanted to use his own pajamas, and not Sora’s this time, he would need to bring some things. He might not stay the night, but…you know. Just in case. Maybe his toothbrush. Clean socks. Oh, whatever. Just shove it all in a bag and go.

And he did.

He wondered, as he walked, if Sora’s mother was home. Should they keep furthering the future they’d set for themselves, sooner or later he’d have to meet her for real…and he didn’t quite know if she’d understand, should she ever find out about…well. He didn’t want to think about it, really. It made his stomach flutter in an uncomfortably anxious way, and seemed to further complicate an already complicated situation. Roxas found himself living in the moment more and more, as of late, simply because the future held too many uncertainties to plan.

He had become an expert at climbing into Sora’s window without the aid of the ladder, though. And this he did tonight, simply because he could. He wondered if the other boy would be waiting for him…and he made sure to peek first, knocking on the side of the siding lightly before entering.

In progress

2006-10-27T18:27:26Z

Title: Travelling
Characters: Axel and Roxas
Time: Organization period
Type: Slash with gender swapping
Rating: NC-17

[23:31] fiery memory: Axel still wasn't sure about this but... he had a feeling he'd end up doing it no matter what his head told him in the end, because Roxas had a mind of his own. A mind that knew that Axel tended to follow him around like a lost puppy because he didn't like anyone else at all here. That was why after his first expression against the idea he didn't say anything beyond that and had actually went about preparing to leave that night, like they agreed. Well... there wasn't much preparing a Nobody could do. All he had, really, was the dumb coat and himself. None of the possessions he had here meant anything to him, so he'd leave them behind; he still wasn't sure if they were going to come back or not but knew Roxas probably wouldn't want to unless it was by force. So... slipping out of the castle that never was and into the city below it with an equally redundant name, Axel headed to and eventually, leaned with a sigh against the wall near the alley they'd agreed to meet by. The weather was dreary as ever and of course the night was pitch black; the only light that was offered were the annoying blinking neon signs Roxas hated. It made it easier to leave in a way, because honestly Axel despised this place too. Axel was a rule-breaker by nature and so this little... adventure with the blond would probably result in a much more relaxed view on what Xemnas' orders might have been. Who knew, it could have been the thing to set him on the path of being a traitor?

[23:44] DualXWielder: Roxas, on the other hand, kept pacing his room, trying to think of anything they might need. He hadn’t managed to amass many belongings here, and very few of them held any sentimental value, but there were a few things he’d like to take if he was sure they weren’t coming back (which he wasn’t sure). Food, for one, but he figured that’d be entirely too cumbersome for this outing. Really, he didn’t want to RUN AWAY so much as…get out of the castle for a little while. It was very likely they’d return, but Roxas wanted to see what was out there; he hadn’t left in so long, and all these preparations were getting him paranoid. It would be nice, to have a break.

He did have some currency he’d managed to acquire in his wanderings, though, and this he secured in one small blue pouch beneath his coat. With that item (which jingled every so often whenever he walked) he set off down the hall. He knew where they’d agreed to meet, and he was eager to get there; walking through the dead city was not one of his more favorite things to do, but he did it, and he did it as quickly as possible. To say he was excited would be an understatement.

He saw Axel long before Axel probably saw him; he had to suppress a smile at the redhead’s doleful expression. He was so nervous about leaving, and it was so uncharacteristic of him, Roxas had to laugh.

“Hey. Y’ready?”

[23:48] fiery memory: Axel perked at the familiar sound of the other's voice, looking up and over at him through the darkness. A smile crossed his sharp features and he moved off the wall, pulling his arms from his chest and letting them hang at his side.

"Yeah, I'm ready," he replied, giving a nod. He turned his head then, garishly red hair shifting with his movements as he glanced toward the dark alley he stood beside. He supposed it would be a good idea to have the portal open up in there; didn't want to do something out in the open street and get noticed, after all...

He did have to wonder if anyone would notice they were gone, though. His logic told him it was very likely no one would, and if they did, they wouldn't care enough to actually go and tell Xemnas about it, but there were still a few lingering doubts floating in his mind about how much trouble this was going to get them in.

He bit them back and turned into the alley, looking over his shoulder. "Would you like to do the honors?" he asked, chuckling a bit.

[23:55] DualXWielder: The smile he flashed almost lit up the entire alley, and he turned immediately to open the portal in front of them. He wasn’t going to even spare time to respond; the black rip in reality bubbled up from the ground and wavered unsteadily in front of them. He remembered a trip much like this, long ago. Oddly enough, Axel had been far more relaxed than he was now.

“Lighten up,” he grinned, glancing over his shoulder before moving to walk through the portal. His blue eyes were bright and beckoning, but then they always held that light whenever he looked at the redhead. They were the last things Axel would see before Roxas disappeared into the portal.

It was something like taking a shot in the dark, or closing your eyes and pointing at words on a page; Roxas picked the direction blindly and had no set path on where he wished to go. They arrived at their destination without so much as a pop; Roxas stepped forward into existence and the first thing he noticed was the biting stink of sand. Against skin.

Skin?

[00:02] fiery memory: Being Axel, the first thing he noticed was the sudden, intense heat. The world that never was was always cold and wet and he didn't like it at all and then the moment he'd stepped through Roxas' portal, he was enveloped in a thick, wonderful warmth, the kind of weather he loved most.

Eventually, other things started to sift into his mind. The feeling of roughness under his bare feet- sand, and... opening his eyes slowly, a long, long expanse of it, a beautiful golden colour that contrasted nicely against an endless and cloudless blue sky. He blinked slightly and looked upward, and that movement prompted one of the last senses to come back to him- he heard the slight jingle of bells, near by.

Near by, seeing as they were on him. His eyes widened, and he immediately jerked his head downward to look at himself. He was NOT prepared to see what he saw right then. Frozen in a stare, he- he couldn't even make sense of what his body was supposed to be now. That, or he didn't want to accept the first dreaded thought that came to mind...

"...R-Roxas?" he asked eventually, unable to tear... her gaze away from the well-rounded set of breasts that sat on her chest, concealed only by a string of gold, and other assorted jewelry.

This was not happening. This was NOT happening.

[00:34] DualXWielder: His arms were bare. He was aware of that initially. He didn’t understand why this was, because his face was still covered by something he took at first to be his hood, but upon closer inspection revealed itself to be a wrapped headpiece with a cloth passing over the bottom portion of his face to ward away the wind. Other than that, he seemed to be wearing very little; loose fitting pants covered his legs and ended below his belly button, and a tunic with a light, finely embroidered vest adorned his chest; for some reason the tunic had no sleeves, which explained why he could feel the immediate brush of the laden wind. Two glittering armbands encircled his wrists, and he could feel the heavy weight of the same metal around his neck and through his ears. This was…weird.

And it was about to get a whole hell of a lot weirder.

He ALMOST didn’t recognize Axel’s voice. He knew it was Axel, because no one else was with him or would call his name. But the pitch, the timbre was all wrong. It was still obviously him, but for some reason the tone was higher now, like he was…scared? But no, it wasn’t that, either. He turned to look, and it was almost the last thing he ever did. If his jaw could have dislocated from his face, it would have; as it stood it was all he could do to remember how to breathe; his pulse was skipping beats all over the place, and he was sure he was having a heart attack.

The woman who stood in Axel’s place was uncommonly beautiful. Deep red hair was pulled back and tied loosely with a leather thong; it spilled down her back like an adornment. And truly, it was one of the only ones her upper body possessed – aside from string after string of golden beads and discs hanging about her neck, she was entirely bare to the skin save for a too-thin swath of crimson fabric that ran from one shoulder to the other. Below that was another coating of gold, these strings surrounding a slender waist and terminating finally in layer after layer of alternating silks and see-through satins. Bracelets and bells of gold also hung from her wrists and jingled at the slightest movement.

Roxas was sure his life ended for a moment, because he had no memory of standing there and staring for as long as he did. It was only Axel’s voice that finally brought him back to himself – deeper, and huskier, but still very much Axel.

“Holy shit,” he whispered at last, the words catching in his throat and in the fabric over his face. “…Axel?”

[00:42] fiery memory: It was still hard for him to look away. He... how... he didn't understand this at all and it was really starting to hurt his head. While he couldn't deny the body that he apparently possessed seemed quite beautiful, as was the elaborate clothing that decorated it, but- it wasn't his! It couldn't be his! He hadn't even thought to take note of the voice that was his and yet not his as well. It was all too much to process.

Hearing Roxas' voice, his only comfort, he looked up quickly and saw his change of garment as well- the black coat was gone, replaced by the traditional clothing of the world. But he was still very much a boy. Green eyes widened at this and then narrowed, finding frustration at that; if Roxas could keep his gender here, why couldn't Axel?!

That thought brought some comfort to him, however. This was only for this world, and so it was only temporary. Still, this was so very odd... he wasn't sure if he liked it. Looking down at himself awkwardly again, his arms extended and he eyed either one of them, lost in examining himself.

"It... I..." he stammered, biting his lip a moment. "It turned me... into..."

[00:53] DualXWielder: "Beautiful," he breathed in an almost reverent tone, before once again coming to himself and realizing how wrong that statement might be taken. He immediately blushed and was suddenly grateful that the face cloth hid most of his features. He almost tripped over himself in an effort to "fix it."

“I…I mean, you were handsome before, I liked you just fine, it’s just…” Bringing a hand around to the back of his head, he rubbed his neck; this was a gesture he always executed when he was nervous or embarrassed about something, though it was hard to tell which he was now.

“..wow.” And that, truthfully, was the only word he could think of to say. The figure before him was fluidity in motion; Axel looked at himself and Roxas could not take his eyes away from how the chains dipped and swayed around that exotic neck, how they pulled away to reveal even more of the supple breasts beneath. He became aware he was staring again only slightly before he became aware of the uncomfortable weight between his legs; his cock was almost painfully hard, though the pants managed to hide it adequately. For the second time in the last five minutes, Roxas blushed and forced himself to look away.

“Uhm.” Think. THINK, dammit, words were simple things. “Maybe we should start walking? Try to get out of this wind? Since you’re not…you know.” He couldn’t quite bring himself to say it, fearful it would only make his situation worse – he was already trying his damnedest not to picture Axel in his mind, or what it might look like when he started walking in this new body.

Oh god.

[01:02] fiery memory: Axel raised his brows at that statement, looking back over at the blond. He was... beautiful? 'Wow'? Was he really worth those words when he looked like this? Honestly, he felt a bit disdainful now, not at all used to the feeling of all of these new... assets that were on his body. Where he felt weight taken away, it was placed back in other spaces... awkward, yes, even if it wasn't entirely as bad as his mind had originally told him.

He shifted and made note of how loose and light his clothing was, and how the little bits of jewelry and such adorned about his body made soft sweet noises. Something feminine. Oddly, Axel's face was just perfect for this; as a man he had the handsome, smooth sort of face that could honestly be mistaken for a girl's if he tried correctly, and now... well, he hadn't changed much at all.

Jaw-line smoother, eyes softer, his shoulders more like a woman's... his hips exaggerated, and of course he felt the heavy breasts on his body. He slowly got used to the body as he came toward Roxas slowly, unable to control the seductive sway of womanly hips, how every movement revealed the dangerousness of the curves he now possessed.

Recognizing that familiar look from Roxas, he grinned and chuckled almost girlishly, licking his softer lips and lifting a hand- pausing a moment, he looked down at it and noticed the longer, beautifully decorated nails and wrist, and then turned his palm upward, nudging away the fabric that covered the other's face so he could cup his hand beneath his chin.

For whatever reason, Axel entirely ignored his words. Maybe he was having too much fun with the role now...

[01:15] DualXWielder: Roxas was twitching. He’d never touched a woman ‘like that’ and truthfully, he’d never given the two he’d known a stare like he was giving Axel now. But they had not looked and did not look like he currently did; now that he was closer, Roxas could smell something deep and musky permeating the tawny skin. It was…jasmine? Perhaps…myrrh.

He didn’t know and he didn’t care. Despite his previous lack of proximity, there was a certain amount of latent behavior that cannot be killed even by continued inexperience or lack of exposure. His body wanted this figure before him; it reacted and responded to those movements and curves like he was bred to do so. And he was. He might enjoy Axel’s cock to the point of obsession, but apparently he was still very obviously MALE.

And when Axel took his chin in that hand, he almost melted. He almost, almost, took the other by those naked arms and pressed him back until there would be no choice but collapse into the sand. He almost reached up to cup one of those orb-like breasts possessively, to kiss the lips, which were currently smirking at him so amusedly. He almost did all those things. Almost.

“Uhm.” Again came the word, repeated for the second time as he tried to gather his thoughts. It was waaay more difficult now. “I…REALLY would like to kiss you right now, but I figure once that starts, there’s probably no chance of it stopping. Soo…unless you LIKE sand in places sand isn’t supposed to go, perhaps we should…start walking and find a place to..” He coughed here. “Rest?”

[01:22] fiery memory: Another girlish laugh, and Axel pulled his hand away, shaking his head. It was funny how much control he could take on Roxas so easily, just with a few subtle movements. "All right, all right," he agreed, and turned his back to him, beginning to survey the area for some place that might be convenient to head to for... rest, as he'd said. "Let's go, then."

The smirk on his face kept, and the moment his eyes caught sight of what seemed to be the entrance to a city just a short walk away, he immediately began to head in that direction. Thankfully that didn't take long at all, and they were entering the gates of Agrabah.

Curiously, Axel glanced about at the bustling marketplace that seemed to take up the majority of the city. He stared for a few moments and naturally, with his bright red hair and rather strikingly beautiful appearance, turned a few heads- it didn't seem like many of the women had their bodies on display as much as his was, unless they were some kind of... street performer.

Careless, however, he looked over his shoulder and at Roxas with a mischievous grin, and headed further in. Turning down what seemed to be one of the quieter streets, he intended to seek out refuge beneath an awning or something, where no one else was around...

[01:34] DualXWielder: He was on the verge of following Axel when he realized his partner didn’t really have a set plan, or know where either of them was going. Now that they were in a city with other distractions, he was more easily able to collect his thoughts; he took in the marketplace and the people, noticing how the pair of them were far more decorated than most of the men and women in the square. Axel was, of course, the more noticeable of the two of them, but there were very few men who wore any sort of jeweled adornment, and his clothes were more colorful than any he saw.

He noticed then that Axel was heading down an alley; he knew the redhead well enough to know he lacked the…foresight to really –plan- things to fruition. With a tiny grin, he reached out to snag that slender hand in his now larger one – this was the first time his hands had ever been larger than Axel’s.

“No, no, no,” he said, and blue eyes were twinkling as he shook his head in a teasingly admonishing gesture. “You will come with me.” He pulled the other along, glancing up at doorways as they went; the money was still a comforting weight at his waist, and it wasn’t long before he saw a housing advertising what appeared to be upscale rooms. As they walked, he was aware of how the men stared, and it was with an inexplicable possessive pride that he clutched the arm at his side. It was amusing, their expressions. Roxas couldn’t help but smile.

“You could dance for them, you know,” he said as he opened the door and moved aside for Axel to enter; his grin as he did this was entirely cheeky, a sort of taunting “ladies first” sort of look. He’d likely be slapped for it.

“Then again, I think I’d rather have you dance for me.” The words were murmured into his ear as Roxas slipped by; procuring a room was easy enough, and upon entrance it proved to be ridiculously opulent. He’d probably been more heedful of what he spent had he been more familiar with money, but as it stood he neither cared nor questioned. Cushions and blankets were everywhere, and those things were wanted and soft.

Perfect.

[01:44] fiery memory: Axel blinked, but let himself be led along. If Roxas had a better idea, well then, be his guest. Glancing about as they walked, trying to take in everything as they moved through the streets yet ignore all of the men that so obviously stared at his body (and the sometimes, the jealous women at their sides), he was nothing but amused with the looks he was getting.

Too bad for them he was all Roxas'. He didn't seem to mind the possessive grip or the gesture of opening the door first- this seemed like a game to him, mostly now, even if he was only beginning to get used to it. The suggestion to dance piqued his interest most definitely and as the blond led them to their room, he half-grinned and contemplated the things he could do for him...

Entering, eyes scanned the area and took everything in. It was as beautiful as the clothes he wore, he noticed, and he almost felt out of place here. He didn't consider himself.... no. Nope, he wasn't going to let his mind wander down that path, not now. He had... someone to entertain now, after all.

Once the doors were closed properly, he smiled and looked toward Roxas. "All right, how do I begin this?" he questioned aloud, a brow quirking as he glanced to the ceiling. Hm. Somewhere in the background there was a dull beat, the sound of music: something happening off in another room, most likely. Axel decided it would be best to pick up on that.

"I'll dance for you, just for you," Axel said, already beginning to slowly rock his hips, arms elevating slightly to give him room to see. "So just sit back and relax..."

DualXWielder: Roxas was sure he had never seen anything like the rhythmic sway of those hips. The exotic décor of the room, the warm sunlight filtering in from the open windows, the thick sents of spices and burning oils carried on the air, all of it combined to carry him away from himself, to make him forget anything but what was right here and right now. It didn’t matter where they’d come from or where they might go after, so long as Roxas could exist in this moment for as long as possible. And it was a beautiful moment to exist in, indeed.

He could tell Axel was finally relaxing and having fun simply by the way the movements slowly became more fluid and relaxed. Music has a way of carrying the psyche away upon itself, of permeating the conscious mind and making everything heady and alive. Roxas knew it was working on him the instant he stopped blushing and became consumed with the desire to touch.

But he didn’t touch. Not yet. It wasn’t his moment right now, and he was taking far too much enjoyment from watching the way the light glittered and shifted off of the jeweled collar at the other’s neck, the way the lines and curves seemed to flow and cascade beneath the shift.

It was doubtful if he could have told anyone his name at this point. All there was was Axel.

[22:46] fiery memory: Axel thought this entire outing would leave him tense, and yet... as he tuned his mind into the music, and as he let everything go, and just melted into it, things began to settle into place. His hips swayed slowly, arms rocking gently in the air as he danced. He had no idea what he was doing, honestly, so he did what came natural- slow, fluid movements, moving, indeed, like a dancing flame.

The movements continued like this for some time; sometimes, a leg would extend, letting his waist rotate at a different angle, and sometimes he would turn to the side and shimmy. Either way, each movement flowed into one, then another, and then another as he continued his dance for him.

Spinning around, the redhead turned his back to Roxas, arms coming up and over his head, hips continuing to rock rhythmically in time to the gentle beat of the music some rooms down. His body lowered slowly, stomach, back and shoulders arching and lowering again and again in a wave of movement with just the slightest of erotic undertones.

He began to move up again, reversing the movements and erecting his spine properly as he turned back around to face the other, a grin on his face as he looked over his expression- not bothering with tease at him with words, as much as he wanted to ask, "Are you having fun?" He continued the movements of his stomach, while tongue darted out to lick over his lips. He was glad Roxas was enjoying this.

[23:08] DualXWielder: The slightest of erotic undertones? This whole experience could not have been more erotic had he been naked instead of partially clothed – that would have left nothing at all to the imagination, and Roxas found he quite enjoyed being teased by the continued reveal and conceal of curves and flesh. His eyes slowly became lidded as he watched; the sun was slipping down in its apex, curling over the sky onto evening, but in the room it was far too dark, even for the waning time of day. The azure orbs were keen and bright beneath the swath of brilliant silk, and it was not a hard stretch of the imagination to think the light surrounding him was reacting to his mood. In the darkness, the flickering flames of the oil lamps caught against the walls and seemed to match the undulating dance performed by the fiery redhead.

Axel came closer now, and Roxas could not stop the back of one hand from raising and brushing at the layers of gossamer fabric covering those legs. It was a slight touch, one that caught the edge of one hip and traveled down to the barest hint of inner-thigh, but it was there all the same and likely amplified by the soft caress of silk against his skin. He wondered if it felt different…being touched in that body. If the same areas would be receptive, or if there was a whole new layer of feeling to discover and explore.

A sudden, intense eagerness to do just that enveloped him, and he glanced up at Axel with a hungry stare.

“Come here,” he commanded, with all the imperious demand of a young rajah. His eyes were gleaming jewels amidst the alabaster of his face, and there was something about the look housed there that was uniquely predatory.

akingofoblivion @ 2006-10-21T16:15:00

2006-10-22T03:12:49Z

Title: Between Friends
Characters: Sora and Roxas
Type: Yaoi
Rating: Danger, Will Robinson!

He was there early, waiting. And he was doing his utmost not to look impatient. Because it wasn't that he was impatient...ok, maybe a little...there were little fluttery butterflies winding their way around in his stomach the longer he stood there, and every so often had to walk a circuit around the dock to release them. The boats were tethered to the pier and he’d made sure one was ready to take just as soon as Sora got here. And he’d tried…he’d tried not to do anything to make Sora uncomfortable, but it was so hard to second-guess what might DO that when it came to his Other. Should he row the boat himself? No? What should he wear? He didn’t want to make it seem like some really fancy thing..even though he kinda did. Eventually he’d settled on a nice pair of khakis and deep navy shirt, which he left untucked, rolled up to the elbow and buttoned only to his clavicle. Even then, in the relatively informal ensemble, he still felt ridiculous.

And yet he felt like he should have done more. Sora seemed to like flashy, complicated clothes, but Roxas always found himself drawn to simple things. Maybe it stemmed from the fact he’d worn “regulation standard” clothing for so long. He found he liked looking somewhat normal, now.

His hands couldn’t seem to find a place – first they were in his pockets, and then they were out at his sides, and then crossed over his chest where they began the whole cycle anew. This was new territory for them both and Roxas desperately wanted it to go well. He’d spent so much time today, picking a place and getting it ready…

Please let it go well…

He hadn’t brought a watch, and that was a good thing, because if he had he’d be looking at it every thirty seconds. As it stood he was doing a slow little shuffling semi-pace across the pier, watching the moon hang bright and ivory above him. Not a cloud. Perfect. He gave thanks for that much, at least.

Inactive

2006-10-16T05:53:23Z

Title: A little kiss.
Characters: Roxas, Sora
Type: You know the drill.
Rating: G to NC-17

He’d taken just as long as he said he would, though he had spared the time to do the same thing Sora had promised to do, which involved toothpaste and a liberal application of it on and around his gumline. After which he’d snagged a backpack and climbed out his window. He’d been doing a lot of that lately…it was nice, since his bedroom was on the first floor, but since he couldn’t teleport anymore he had to come up with alternative ways to get in and out of the house undetected. Soirees seemed to be a prevalent thing nowadays. It was a wonder he got any sleep at all.

Five minutes. He’d become expert at navigating the space between his house and Sora’s in as short a time as possible. He didn’t even really need the rope ladder; there was a tree nearby that was easily scaled (he’d done it more than once) if Sora forgot to leave it down, and Roxas was old hat to dexterous feats of acrobatic prowess. He tried to be as discreet about it as possible, though. Landing inside a window with a thud was not the greatest way to make an entrance into someone else’s house.

For the most part, though, Sora didn’t forget. And he hadn’t forgotten now, so Roxas easily scrambled up the side of the house. As his head appeared over the window ledge, however, it was wearing more than its traditional wide, boyish grin. This time there was a large yellow mass balanced atop it, which upon closer inspection would prove to be an oversized beanie pillow.

Shaped like (of all things) a paopu.

Yep. He totally just went there.

Telephone calls. - Inactive

2006-10-15T06:25:38Z

Title: Toeing the line.
Characters: Roxas, Riku
Type: ....*cough*
Rating: G to NC-17

Indecision was not something Roxas was very familiar with, but he was currently experiencing it as he sat in his computer chair and stared at the screen and the ten little numbers glaring back at him from the instant messenger window. Several scenarios were running their merry way through his head, and not all of them were pretty -- maybe he and Riku weren't fighting, per se, but there was still a part of him that sometimes questioned the other's motivations...and rightfully so. Riku could be a tad subvertive when the opportunity called for it, and he coudn't help but wonder for a split second whether or not this was all a prank. If, when he finally called the number, a very angry not-Riku type person would be on the other line. It WAS one in the morning...after all.

Curiosity has been the downfall of many a man, however, and Roxas was not immune to its song. He found his hand gravitating toward the telephone in spite of his better judgement...he didn't have to say anything, right? Worst thing that could happen would be that someone would answer the phone, yell at him, and hang up again. Or he could just say it was the wrong number. Or hell, HE could hang up if he wanted to. What was there to lose?

The receiver was cold to his ear, the dial tone jarring and loud in the silence of his bedroom. One by one, the numbers were pressed with a steady finger; the lights beneath each one winked out with the pressure. Eight...nine...ten. Riku'd given an area code, and Roxas found himself wondering why. Was the island really that big?

Riiiiing. Riiiiiiiiing. The beat of his heart was a doubletime cadence to the slow pulse of the ringer in his ear.

ACTIVE

2006-10-04T06:59:34Z

Title: The Big Goodbye (OPEN)
Characters: Namine, Roxas, Axel
Story: Crack
Time: 1920's Film Noir
Rating: R

(This SL is open to applicants. Please reply to the SL app thread if you are interested in joining us. Apps must fit the story and be approved by all characters.)

It was that kinda evening, the kind that makes people run inside to escape the heavy weather, the kind that makes writers start their stories with “It was a dark and stormy night.” Only every night in this place was dark and stormy, and I wasn’t in the mood to do any running. I’d been running far too long, from my past and my future, and I’d decided it was time to get out my long black overcoat and see what kind of squall it could stand up to. I didn’t know who I was more worried for – me, or the coat.

As I walked back to my office, I could feel the weight of the clouds over my head, suffocating me. It was like they knew I wasn’t gonna get very far today; they hugged my every step and brought with them a sort of whispering cold that latched onto your soul. I shivered…and pulled my coat closer around my shoulders. It was the kinda night that made it easy for someone to follow you. Up ahead, the neon flickered. I heard the rain against the pavement.

Drip. Drip. Just like footsteps. I quickened my pace.

When I finally opened the door to my room I felt a strange sort of relief spread through my chest; I’m no coward, but there was just something about the city tonight that made a man edgy, jittery. Like the next corner you turned could be your last, if you weren’t watching where you going. Well, I always watched. When you’re a guy like me in a town like this, you don’t live long if you ain’t watching.

I slid the sign on my door to OPEN. But I didn’t take off my coat.

AIM RP

2006-10-04T00:52:47Z

Characters: Axel and Roxas
Type: Post KH2
Story: Plot-driven
Title: Reunion

Axel: Axel had been gone for a while. There hadn't been a warning: no notes, no e-mails, not even a whispered goodbye in the middle of the night. One day he was there, warm and real and alive, and the next the bed and breakfast he had been staying at was one patron short. It happened suddenly and left a great deal of a mess in its wake.

It was a night not unlike the one Roxas last saw Axel during. It was late, later than either of them should have been awake, and the sky was very clear. All of the stars were visible, casting Destiny Islands in an eerie waning glow that almost pulsated. Maybe Roxas was dozing, or even asleep. Maybe he was restlessly cruising the Internet, hoping for some sign or completely forgetting about it. Whatever he was doing, there was no mistaking the slow tearing noise of space being pulled apart as a portal formed near the window.

Nothing stepped out, at least not immediately, but the portal was there nonetheless.

Roxas: He hadn’t been on the internet, but he hadn’t been sleeping either. Roxas was lying on his back in his bed with his arms linked behind his head, staring at the ceiling. The conversation with Sora earlier that day was weighing heavily on his heart and no matter what he did sleep just wouldn’t come. His mind was mulling over too much, and the restlessness of uncertainty was too much to push away.

Not knowing was horrible. More horrible than most things he could think of. For a long time he’d worried, before the anger and frustration had started to take over. And then all the myriad of accusations and justifications began to come – wasn’t it just like him? Didn’t he have issues committing to anything emotional? Hadn’t they fought about this same thing so many times before? But it was different now, and the newness of their intimacy made it a hundred times worse. Roxas could not stop the feeling of betrayal that had begun to develop in the recesses of his heart.

He hadn’t even said goodbye.

When the portal appeared, however, Roxas discovered something that was quite possibly worse than not knowing, and that was the manifestation of the truth. Jerking into a sitting position, he watched the portal with wide eyes, waiting. When Axel didn’t appear as expected, his heart fluttered.

What now?

Axel: Maybe Axel wanted to make a dramatic entrance. Keeping Roxas waiting even that extra ten seconds created the intended effect: someone's heart was beating a little too fast...

The portal rippled as it was wont to do before someone stepped out of it, dressed entirely in black that would have resembled the Organization's regalia if it had been leather. This was pure black cloth, as though he had been venturing in a frozen wasteland someplace and needed protection from the sand storms. There was a pause before the rest of his body followed, revealing that he was wearing a backpack slung casually over one shoulder.

His awkward posture should have been enough to identify him. Axel dropped the backpack and turned to face Roxas, apparently at a loss for words--or having too many words to choose from.

But before this moment could turn stale, he crossed over to the bed and sat down on the edge without being invited to. Despite the shroud over his head, his eyes were very green.

Roxas: Blue eyes followed his movements with a hungry, unwavering stare. And though he’d gone over what he wanted to say a thousand times in his head, all those carefully constructed words now crumbled to dust and were blown away in the wake of Axel’s actual presence. The clothing was a surprise, though somehow oddly appropriate – he’d become so used to seeing Axel dressed in garb much like this, he ceased to think anything about it like Sora had.

Roxas was sitting in the middle of the bed when Axel slid down on the edge, and for a long moment they simply sat next to one another in silence. His heart was beating fast, yes, and that was obvious by the red flush to his cheeks. The urge to lash out, to say words to hurt and sting as much as he’d been hurting, was supreme. He wanted to be bitter, to ask the question his heart kept repeating – Why did you leave me? And though he wasn’t willing to start off the meeting with anger, it was still probably very prevalent by the look in his eyes how he was feeling.

He said nothing, and it was obvious this was the time Axel was being given to explain himself. The calm before the storm.

Axel: Axel reached up and pulled at the black cloth that covered his nose and mouth so that at least the front of his face was left uncovered. He didn't look particularly hungry or restless, unlike Roxas, whose emotions seemed even easier to read now than before. There was an odd sort of resignation in his expression, though that didn't come with bad connotations: he had left to discover something and had, of course, discovered it. Now there was completion.

His lips finally quirked to make something of a smile. "You must hate me, huh?"

But he didn't leave it at that question. While he removed his gloves, he continued to speak: "I went away because I couldn't stay. I had to know whether or not being around you was making me feel like I had a heart, some false emotion that'd disappear as soon as I was away for long enough. I had to know. So I left because I knew you'd follow me if you could. Heh...

"And, well, I found out."

Roxas: It was a cheap thing, to simply leave it at that, and for a little bit longer Roxas didn’t respond out of an expectation Axel would finish. When it became clear he was intent on being dramatic, however, he released a little exhalation of breath.

He’d left to see if his emotions were false? There was something to that which didn’t quite ring true, but Roxas didn’t know why. Couldn’t he have been able to figure that out when he thought Roxas was gone forever? Wouldn’t he have known the first time Roxas left, when he did everything in his power to ‘rescue’ him from merging with Sora? But perhaps not, after all, for in both of those instances there were extenuating circumstances. Both of them involved a sense of loss, of death, of inevitability. There was no choice in it.

And a part of him was afraid to know the answer Axel held back. It might be melodramatic to say a life was hanging in the balance, depending on his next words, but it was true – Depending on what the results had been, it would either spell hope or doom for something that had once been so brilliant. Too, there was the matter of Sora, and his ultimatum. Regardless, whatever Axel said tonight, someone was going to lose.

“And what did you find out?” The words came out as sort of a soft murmur, level and frank, betraying nothing like the expressions upon his face. But perhaps that was to be expected. Roxas knew how to moderate his voice; he didn’t know how clearly the muscles in his expression twitched and pulled with pain and worry.

Axel: There was a lot more to it that Axel wasn't saying just yet, which was why the excuse almost seemed hollow at a first glance. Plenty of times he had been away from Roxas, whether by choice or by orders from the Organization, and then there had been that time when he thought Roxas was gone forever. This excursion of his...

"I did a lot of... soul-searching, I guess you could say," Axel added, still trying to smile and starting to fail. "I know I'm not the best..."

Maybe his absence had been, really, to see what would happen with Roxas if he weren't around. Maybe he knew about everything that had happened, which was why he suddenly looked hesitant. He had left, and Roxas had done some things. Cause and effect.

"But I found out that... uhm..."

He scratched at his hair, though it was covered in black, and then started digging through his many pockets. He finally pulled out a small jewelry box--maybe this was his peace offering--and held it out to Roxas. Instead of letting Roxas take it, he opened it himself: inside were two glittering, beautiful rings sitting side by side. One was inlaid with diamond, and the other with black sapphire. They resembled the two rings that Roxas had always worn, though these were obviously far more expensive.

"I found out that I... don't do well without you, and it has nothing to do with having or not having a heart."

Things got a little more surreal when Axel slid off the side of the bed and got on his knees in order to offer these rings.

It was like he was proposing.

Roxas: To say his jaw dropped was an understatement. It unhinged from his skull and hung limp from his face, the only thing keeping it from clattering to the floor being the thin veil of flesh over his face. His tongue worked uselessly in his mouth, his eyes wide and unblinking. This was…it was….not happening…it was…what the hell was this?!

There was a part of him that crumbled a little at the scene before him. Riku’s opinion might not be very high of their relationship, and he might not think Axel was a –good person-, but there were things that neither Sora nor Riku knew about their lives, and that they would never know, which had always contributed to his unwavering trust in the redhead. Roxas KNEW Axel, better than probably anyone else, and while he didn’t pretend to think Axel was a paragon of virtue, there were some things he knew unconditionally that Axel simply would or wouldn’t do. All those beliefs had been shaken when Axel had up and left, and while he wasn’t going to invalidate what had happened with Sora by saying it was because of Axel, he also knew that much of his bitterness had stemmed from the fact that he’d started to question whether or not Riku was right, all along…

He stared at the rings, overcome with the surreal nature of the moment. Axel. Was offering him rings. Rings? He went away for a month and came back with RINGS. There was just…nothing to think. All higher brain functions had shut down, and distantly he wondered if this hadn’t been Axel’s plan all along. And with that question came a certain feeling of irritation. He KNEW this would be unexpected. He’d been counting on it. And the shock of something unexpected always made Roxas forget his anger.

“So…I don’t understand.” He finally remembered how to work his voice and mouth again; now that he had, he fixed Axel with those brilliant azure eyes, now narrowed beneath the weight of his furrowed brow. “What are you…what are you saying here, that you…what?” He almost couldn’t complete the sentence. This really wasn’t fair.

“I mean…a whole month, Axel, and you come back with this? You just…drop this on my lap and…augh!” Unconsciously, his hands raised and buried themselves in his hair, which he tugged with frustration. The fact that Sora had been right didn’t make things much easier – he hadn’t stopped loving the redhead. Not even while he thought he’d left for good.

Axel: Axel looked at Roxas earnestly the entire time, even as Roxas struggled to figure out what the hell was going on. He didn't disappear again and the rings were just there, solid and definite, shining in the low light of Roxas' bedroom.

"I was going to get you some roses too," Axel admitted with a slowly shy (it should have been sly) smile. "But they'd die eventually. This sound so--retarded--but Roxas... I don't want what we have to be like the roses. These rings aren't going to wilt."

To make matters worse, Axel carefully plucked one of the rings from the box and started to reach for a hand currently buried in all that blonde hair. His touch was as gentle as a kiss while he tried to dislodge those fingers and find one to slide the ring onto.

"I'm saying that I want you to say yes," he clarified, bowing his head in almost prayer. "You don't--if something happened while I was gone--then I couldn't blame you, could I? It's not like I gave you a heads up--not like I proved that I... but...

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

Roxas: There was a split second where he let Axel guide his hand down into his lap, but when it became clear his intention was to slip one of the rings onto his finger, Roxas grabbed the hand that held his to stop the movement. This was all well and good and romantic, but there were simply too many things which needed to be discussed for any riding-into-the-sunset to occur. Namely, the fact that Roxas was a teenager, and still in high school.

Guiding the other boy up from his crouch, he pulled Axel onto the bed with a little sigh. He felt guilty for having to ask these sorts of questions, but they beat around the bush far too much, and Roxas was tired of it. This was part of the reason why they were in this predicament now; had Axel just been up front with his feelings, none of this would have ever happened.

“Axel.” He didn’t really know where or how to begin, only that he had to, and it would probably be hard. “I love you. I know you know that. And this…relationship has always been really…weird. I appreciate what you’re saying, and the fact that you’re saying it, but…I can’t help but wonder why. You…you were gone for a month, and you just spontaneously decided to buy me rings and tell me you want to be with me forever?” Looking up once again, blue eyes met aquamarine; they searched the depths there as though looking for reassurance…or perhaps afraid of catching something false.

“Are you telling me everything? Is that really why you’re doing this? Or is there something else you’re not saying?”

Axel: Axel's smile didn't fade--in fact, it grew a little larger when Roxas had the foresight to pick at the chinks in this story's armor.

"It took me going away to realize that I shouldn't be shy about this. We've always had trouble communicating when it matter, as if that weren't obvious. I wanted you to know that I'd miss you when you left, but I wasn't able to say it above a whisper. I wanted to tell you that I was going away, but all I managed was to stand in front of your house for an hour in that rainstorm. You remember that storm, right? That was the night.

"So here I am. I'm telling you absolutely, matter-of-FACTly what I think of you and us and everything." Axel dropped his hands onto the bed and then wilted a little, like the rose he had mentioned eventually dying. He looked very tired, but he didn't comment on why or how. Where had he been all this time? "I just... missed you all the time."

Roxas: It was only after Axel said those last words that Roxas allowed his heart to ache. Well, technically it’d been aching the entire time, but he’d managed to ignore it in an attempt to be strong and unyielding. Now, though, he simply couldn’t pretend anymore; Axel’s shoulders drooping in defeat had the same effect on Roxas as Sora crying. It hit him, hard, right where it hurt most.

He wanted to crawl into the other’s lap, to sit in his embrace and forget all the bad thoughts and feelings he’d been experiencing over the past month. But while the thought was tempting, this cathartic confrontation was far from over – Axel may have hinted at the expectation of something happening with someone else, but it was far too complicated to simply leave it at that.

Still, though, he couldn’t stop the tiny, vulnerable whisper that slipped past his lips. All the insecurity, all the questioning of the last four weeks, the anger and the hurt balled itself up into one small configuration of words that left him more vulnerable and open than any tirade or display of tears could have.

“I missed you, too,” he said, looking at the carpet. “It hurt a lot, you know. Not knowing where you were, or if you were coming back. It was…a pretty shitty thing to do, no matter what you were trying to accomplish.” He looked absolutely miserable for a second, his hands folded in a heap in his lap.

“A lot happened while you were gone.”

Axel: Axel couldn't sit idly by when Roxas looked that wretched. All it took was that bleak look Roxas gave the bedspread for Axel to reach over and wrestle him closer, even if he didn't want to be held or comforted. Axel was very warm, especially when in all that heavy black clothing. He held on almost tight enough to bruise whatever part of Roxas he grasped.

"Heh," he murmured, nosing into Roxas' hair a little. "Now you know how I felt when you got kidnapped--not that I wanted this to happen this way... it just did.

"I'm here, okay? You can tell me anything. I promise."

Of course, Axel hadn't made any promises about how he'd react.

Roxas:He didn’t know what to think. Deep down, there was a voice that intoned incessantly that this would all end in a horrible, horrible mess, that he would lose all the people he loved, all the people who were most important to him. Sora’d already lost Kairi. He new know how that must feel, because the prospect of never having this presence beside him, of not knowing Axel’s face so close to his hair, filled him with a sickening dread.

There was no stopping it. Axel’s embrace pulled him close and that distance was the only thing allowing him to hang onto his emotion. His hands shot up to cling to the thick, warm fabric of the other’s shirt, and Roxas cried. Deep, soul-wracking sobs which shook the entirety of his body as if they would break it to pieces.

“Why weren’t you here? I lost him and I was so alone, so alone, why weren’t you here?” The pain of being separated from Sora had been a debilitating one, but Axel couldn’t know or even begin to understand that. He'd never liked Roxas' connection to Sora to begin with, how could Roxas expect him to understand the reasoning behind everything that had happened? Axel would likely misinterpreted the steady stream of almost unintelligible murmurs, but they were all Roxas could give as he cried.

"He chose Kairi and I lost him and I was so alone.."

Axel: "R-Roxas..."

Axel's voice was humid and shaky, but no tears fell. Maybe it really was impossible for Nobodies to cry, and anything that Axel might shed may as well have leaked out of a crocodile. He clutched at Roxas as though he were a lifeline--in some ways, maybe he was--and refused to let go, even as those gut-wrenching sobs shook them both.

"I'm here, okay? I'm right here," Axel whispered furiously, pushing his face against Roxas' and refusing to let the stream-of-consciousness monologue overpower what he had to say. "I'm not going to leave you again, come Hell or high water. God, it was bad of me--I should've known... I'm so sorry...

"Please forgive me," he finished, barely audible, and pressed a hallowed kiss to one of Roxas' temples.

Roxas:The heavy shaking eventually dimmed, held together by the tight, fierce presence of Axel’s arms around his body. Roxas sat for a minute, hiccupping in an utterly despondent manner, staring at the black lap in front of him. The words were distant and quiet in the midst of his buzzing brain; in the aftermath of his tears, everything seemed painfully loud.

“I forgive you,” came the whisper, but it was as though he was passing on a hope and keeping none for himself. The silence stretched on for a moment longer, and then he began to talk.

“He said part of my light was reserved for someone else. That it wasn’t right for us to be connected like that if we weren’t going to choose to live in each other’s light. He said he wanted to give all of himself to someone, and I wasn’t willing to give all of me back.” There was a pause in which Roxas blinked, but still did not move. It almost seemed as though he was talking to himself rather than telling Axel a story.

“He chose Kairi. I couldn’t feel him anymore. That place in my heart where he always was…it hurt so bad. Empty, all the time. Like a part of me was missing, and I couldn’t find it. Worse than not having a heart, almost, worse than being a shell. Riku knew. He told me to go talk to him. Riku knew he was hurting too. We never thought it’d be…like that…”

He closed his eyes briefly then, almost as though to steel himself for the words that came next. And with the action, one last lone tear slipped free. “He kissed me. And it wasn’t the same, but it was something. And it helped the pain hurt less. And I knew it was wrong, I knew it was, but it hurt so bad and I felt so alone.” The last statement seemed to be repeated like some sort of mantra. Maybe it was his justification. Maybe it was his excuse. Maybe it was a little bit of both, but mostly it was the truth.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Axel:Axel's breathing was noticeably shallower after this revelation. Maybe he hadn't known what had happened, then, though he didn't shove Roxas away or vanish again in a fit of irrational anger at being betrayed. It wasn't like they had been dating officially or anything, and usually your boyfriend didn't just skip town for a month with no word edgewise. It was just as much his fault. His breathing just slowed and lessened, though his arms were locked tight around Roxas.

"Heh," was Axel's initial response, though nothing about this was particularly funny. He shut his eyes and rested his head against soft blonde hair. He was so tired from trying to digest and understand all of this so quickly. "Roxas, you know what?

"You got what you wanted all along: independence. Xemnas gave you your name and you always... always resented this Sora you didn't know, because you'd be his shadow forever and you had to know if he was really all that or not. Heh..."

Axel dragged his fingers up Roxas' sides and then touched the very center of his chest, right over his breastbone. It wasn't where the heart was anatomically, but it was close enough.

"I don't know if I have any light to give," he murmured, "but you can have all of me."

Roxas:He released another noise then, a cross between a hiccup and a sob and a choked, mutated laugh. His eyes were shining with tears both unshed and shed; how did someone who struggled with communicating his feelings always managed to say something so perfect at just the right moment? There was a fleeting, bittersweet smile over his features, and the kiss bestowed immediately after was swift but fierce.

When he pulled away, fingers were intertwined into the hand over his heart; Roxas clutched at Axel’s hand and stared down at their mingled connection. He didn’t bother to reposition the touch – it WAS close enough. And it was less the correctness of the gesture and more the meaning of it.

Something was still troubling him, though, and as he dragged his thumb over the back of Axel’s palm, another frown appeared along the corners of his mouth. Sora…Sora. Sora was his Other, and he always would be that, connection or not. He doubted this would end perfectly, but just like he could not simply drop Axel at Sora’s demand, he couldn’t deny to Axel the fact that he still very much needed the other boy. Looking back up, he once again searched those twin pools of aquamarine for something nameless.

“He’s a part of me, Axel. I’m independent, yes, but…he’s still a part of me. He always will be. I’ve realized…I’ll never be able to leave him behind.” And it was true. Maybe Riku had understood it best when he realized Sora and Roxas came as a package. Not, perhaps, in a lewd way, but…well. He’d fight and die for his Other in just the same way he’d fight and die for Axel. And the redhead’s reaction was being carefully gauged by bright blue eyes.

Axel: Axel could only look back into Roxas' eyes for a little while before he had to look away. He shut his eyes and took a few breaths, possibly to compose himself or to confirm that this was still a reality. When he opened his eyes again, he looked both warm and resigned as he had earlier.

"I know," he said simply. His fingers moved a little despite being intwined with Roxas', but he didn't pull them away. "I've had a long time to understand that. Enough time. I know that I'll never be enough."

His tone wasn't as self-deprecating as it might have been in the past, but what he said was nonetheless true. He could never be Roxas' Other, since that wasn't how the dice of the universe had rolled. While he did matter, there was nothing really intrinsic there; he wasn't the material that made up Roxas. Life had gone on without him, hadn't it?

He looked down at nothing in particular. "So... it's... okay. I understand."

They had touched, even kissed, but Axel didn't know what Roxas had wanted. Maybe he wanted to go try to get back Sora's light and Axel wasn't supposed to interfere with that.

Roxas: But he didn’t understand, not really. Life hadn’t gone on without him; life had been miserable without him. Sora was his Other, yes. And there was a part of his light reserved for that. He wished, somehow, that the world did not operate in wholes. Sora had said once, that you could love more than one person. Would it really be so terrible, if that’s how it worked?

But he knew it wasn’t fair. And he knew Sora well enough to know that the minute Roxas told him about this conversation, he would likely bow out. Because that’s the person Sora was, and no amount of promise of some sort of elusive balance would cause the boy to stay. It would rip them both to shreds, he was sure, but…that was Sora for you. They’d already hopelessly complicated their lives so much...

And he didn’t know how to explain to either of them that there was no ‘better’, there was simply ‘different.’ Roxas needed Sora because he was Sora, and Axel because he was Axel. It wasn’t that one was superior, or that Axel couldn’t fill a space. There were spaces Sora couldn’t fill, either; there was no awkwardness, no off-balance embarrassment or shame when he kissed Axel. They WERE friends who were lovers, something that he and Sora were most certainly not. He’d had always been of the opinion that the reason Axel felt filled was because Roxas had given him a portion of his heart to feel with.

He wasn’t going to take it back.

“Axel.” The taller man would find his face cupped by broad palms, with fingers splayed out on either side of his cheeks. Roxas was forcing him to keep and hold his gaze. “I couldn’t leave you, either.”

It wasn't an easy situation. But then what in life was?

Axel: Axel's expression became a little whimsical and nostalgic once he was forced to look at Roxas. He tilted his head a little to the side, almost nuzzling against one of the hands on his cheeks, and almost kissed the skin nearest his mouth.

"You couldn't," he said, not making it a question. The knowledge warmed him. He had no doubt in his mind that Roxas had looked for him when he had been gone. He had to. "I... heh. Can I stay tonight?"

Roxas: There really wasn’t any getting around the fact that when he was around Axel, there was literally nothing else in the world. The redhead had a way of making him forget…everything. Even in the beginning, when they’d only been “friends”, the reason he’d clung to Axel so desperately was because he helped Roxas to forget a lot of the horrors that kept him awake at night. Maybe there were “better” people out there, but he’d stuck by Roxas when it had mattered most, and that meant a lot, to him.

“Where else were you expecting to stay?” Using his grip to bring their foreheads together, Roxas nuzzled there with his eyes closed for a moment. Maybe he was naïve. Maybe. But right now, he didn’t want to be anything else.

“Where did you go? Really?” he whispered, scooting his body so that he was physically wrapped around Axel with both arms and legs like some sort of gargantuan parcel. He’d said ‘somewhere’, but Roxas wanted to know, especially since he looked like he’d been through hell and back.

Axel: Axel sighed quietly when Roxas asked that and hooked around him like some missing puzzle piece that had been missing forever. With one of his arms slung around Roxas' waist, he was free to feather his fingers through Roxas' hair over and over again. His hair was very soft and smelled clean.

"I went to the edge of the universe," he replied, smirking a little. "As far away as I could possibly get so that I'd be totally alone with myself to think. I also uhm... looked for someplace nice we could go later. Like a vacation."

Or a honeymoon. Since Roxas wasn't exactly keen on the idea of getting hitched, a vacation was a nice enough cover instead.

Then, spur-of-the-moment and very gently, he kissed Roxas just because he could.

Roxas: All further thought and speech was silent for a moment, because there was one sure-fire way to distract Roxas, and that was to have Axel kiss him. He could be in the middle of a tirade and the redhead could kiss him silent, though he’d likely very put-out with him afterward. It was an obvious weakness, but a welcome one; Roxas kissed back with an obvious eagerness that bordered on overzealous. His hands, which had previously been on Axel’s cheek, now snuck up to bury themselves in the depths of his long red hair.

He wasn’t getting out of that kiss any time soon, either. Roxas was making up for a month of not kissing with as much now-kissing as time and lack of breath would allow. Because he didn’t even pause to do that, and for a few moments it wasn’t clear if Axel would ever be let go.

At last, though, he was, and blue eyes gazed up at him, sparkling and adoring. Roxas smile was wide and bright when it was present, and it was present now.

And then a thought occurred, and he looked pensive for a moment. “But…I’m in school now. Are you going to…stay around? I mean…you know.” What he was asking was if Axel was going to wait for him, for real this time, but the words just didn’t seem to want to come out. It wasn’t that he wouldn’t commit to being with Axel, it was just that…for a sixteen-year-old, rings and words like “marriage” were huge and unwieldy things, unable to be fully understood.

Axel: Axel's lungs--among other things--were burning after that kiss. His mouth was parched, even though he had just gotten a long, sweet drink of something better than ambrosia. There was just enough saliva to make his lips glisten when he tried to wet them. Yes, Roxas was sixteen years, but he kissed like he was much, much older. And when he looked that sexy despite looking so carefree, it was hard to remember this relationship could be considered illegal in many places.

He stole another kiss, though he ended it before Roxas could get too excited.

"I'll wait for you," he vowed, nodding just enough. "I'd wait forever for you.

"If you--if you don't wanna wear the rings, at least keep them until you will."

Roxas: Looking down, he gazed at the little box with the glistening rings settled within. Tentatively, he reached out a hand and plucked them free; in the dim light of the bedroom, they twinkled and shone whenever he moved his palm. A small smile began to work its way across his face; separating the silver ring from the black, Roxas held it up for inspection. It was very brilliant, catching and reflecting light in a myriad of fractured color. Whenever he shifted it, he could hear the way its luminosity literally sang out in its own unique voice.

Of the pair of them, this one was the most Roxas, which was probably why Axel had tried to give it to him first. Which was also why Roxas now reached out to place it in the other’s palm, carefully folding over black-gloved fingers before looking back into his eyes.

“You keep this one.” His smile was small but real, his voice quiet. The other ring, still held carefully in his free hand, contrasted sharply with pale skin. He, too, curled his fingers around it. Its weight was real and sure.

“You wear too much black anyway.” In the darkness, azure eyes sparkled like sapphires.

Song Entry

2006-10-01T06:30:28Z

We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see
I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

akingofoblivion @ 2006-09-26T23:44:00

2006-09-27T04:41:58Z

Title: You Can't Go Home Again (OPEN)
Universe: Canon, Post-KH2
Story type: WANGST
Current characters: Roxas and Riku
Rating: R

Ostensibly, the stage didn’t look any different. Not as he climbed the stairs, nor as he approached the center. The billboards were the same, still peppered with fliers, still ringed with benches and bleachers. Only now, there was no cheering, no crowds of people waiting to view a match. The arena was silent and still.

He’d meant to go looking for Axel, and he had. But being severed from the darkness, which had previously made travel so easy, now hindered him; he didn’t know where to start looking, and the vastness of the universe seemed almost overwhelming. So, in the end he’d decided to start his search where everything had begun, in a way. The place he’d been avoiding in his thoughts, in his dreams and in his heart. Roxas returned to Twilight Town.

He wanted to pretend he was doing it purely as a way to rule out the presence of his erstwhile companion here, but deep down he knew that was a lie. The desire to return to this world had simmered deep and strong for a long time; often, when his thoughts were left unguarded, Roxas found himself wondering about the people he’d met here, those whom he’d formed relationships with. Sometimes, when he was least expecting it, he would be overcome with a sickening nostalgia, a longing to return and visit these ‘friends’. That was before he remembered it had all been fake. That was before his mind realized that even if he did come back, they wouldn’t remember him at all.

Still possessed of those memories falsely implanted into his mind, for a long time Roxas struggled to reconcile the fact that the life he remembered in snippets and pictures was not real. He had regained his memories of the Organization, but Twilight Town had not faded away in the interim; smells or sounds or even glimpses of people caught around corners would remind him in a rush, and for a moment he would relive a memory that had never happened. In that split second, he’d smile…and then the reality would kick in, the knowledge that it was all a lie, and the wistfulness would be replaced with an overwhelming shame and frustration. Fake. Fake. It was all fake.

But somehow, it still didn’t kill his desire to go back, his curiosity, the longing to see ‘home’ again.

His feet carried him to the middle of the stage, and for a moment he could feel the adrenaline rush of knowing the fight would begin soon. For an instant, he could hear the cheers of the crowd as they waited for the inevitable struggle; in his mind, he heard the words of his friends as they shouted their support. The memories were pure and vivid, and for a split second, he let them come.

“Hey. You lookin’ for something?” The voice broke into his reverie, startling in its familiarity. Roxas didn’t need to turn around to know who would be standing there; he didn’t need to whirl to confirm his instinct was correct. Still, he found himself doing it anyway.

The boy stood on the steps, his bare arms crossed over his chest and his head tilted in an expression of open curiosity. Close-cropped brown hair stuck up in a makeshift buzz-cut which somehow fit the expression of wary territorialism housed in his eyes. Roxas knew him well enough to know he was being polite simply because it was the thing to do when you first spoke to strangers. Then again, Hayner had always been a bit selective when it came to whom he trusted.

Roxas found an uncharacteristic lump in his throat as he stared back at his onetime friend, not so much because it was a shock to see him again, but because there was absolutely no recognition in his gaze. The urge to wave, to smile, to be friendly…all that died in the instant he looked into the other boy’s eyes and saw nothing but a stranger.

“No…thanks. I was just looking.” The words fell curiously flat from his lips. He had images of growing up with Hayner, of playing tag with him, of the first day of school, of skipping class to go to the beach. He could remember sharing secrets with him, exploring abandoned houses filled with all manner of things made to entice young boys, of doing the myriad of activities only best friends can do.

False. Lies. Artificial. Hayner did not remember these things, and mentioning them would only cause discomfort and pain.

“Oh.” The boy screwed up his face for a moment, as if sizing Roxas up; Roxas felt his hand twitch at his side, but he forced it to lie still. “Well, okay then." A pause. "You new around here?” He seemed confused about something, and Roxas could feel a sliver of anticipation growing in the depths of his chest. “Cause you remind me of someone I used to know.”

“Who?” The word was barely a whisper, and Roxas couldn’t help but feel hope. Could it be…was it possible he did remember something, somehow? “I mean, I’m just visiting, but I came here once. A long time ago.” The lie was real, but his truth was not. He'd never been to THIS place before. Just a semblance of it.

Hayner seemed to debate something for a long moment before shaking his head in dismissal. “Nah…guy I’m thinking of had brown hair. Kinda spiky. You look like him, though.” He blinked, and shrugged, and with those words Roxas felt his heart fall into the depths of his stomach. “Funny.”

“Yeah. Funny.” But it wasn’t.

“Well, if you need anything, let me know. I’m sure I’ll see you around town, if you’re visiting. I gotta get to class. See ya!” And with that, the boy hopped from the step and took off with a loping stride down the street. Roxas could only watch him go in silence.

Why did I come here? He knew the answer, of course, but he did not want to admit it. He’d known this wouldn’t be home. But he’d needed to prove it to himself. And now that he had, the truth stung him with its harsh reality.

I want Sora. I want Axel. I want to go home.